Page 7 | To decline to answer what school my child goes to?

Alongthepineconetrail · 12/10/2024 06:10

I had the supermarket check out lady ask me and I mentioned the general area rather than the actual school. There are 8 schools in my borough so it could be any one of them.

Just say he goes to the local schooDodown the road, job done. I think you're overthinking it, this issue can be very easily dealt with politely.

ahemfem · 12/10/2024 06:00

peterrabbitontvagain · 12/10/2024 05:53

I'm a teacher and I always get asked where I teach. I hate it. There's such a pressure on teachers atm. It's always followed up by someone the know who goes there and then makes me paranoid!

Why? It's normal talk to ask where people work.

ahemfem · 12/10/2024 05:59

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 02:08

But people on social media blank out their kids school jumper logos , I've seen it

Yeah but really they shouldn't be putting their kids photo on the Internet at all they just don't get the real threat posed

DreamW3aver · 12/10/2024 05:53

Sparklfairy · 12/10/2024 05:27

If it's a small town where people talk, I hate to tell you this, but your obdurate answer will get them talking more. What is she hiding? It was just small talk, has she got a crazy ex? Should we be worried in the community for our safety? The gossip will spread like wildfire.

I would say he goes to a completely different school. Then it's a socially acceptable answer that won't start the rumours, and you get to keep your privacy. Don't pick a different one every single time though - because you'll lose track

Then you'll get all tied up in knots, the hairdresser will say oh my niece goes there, he's the same age as you child, is he in Mrs so and sos class or what did you think about that shocking thing that happened last week etc and what then what do you say?

I can't think of an evasive reply that won't make you sound a bit weird

peterrabbitontvagain · 12/10/2024 05:53

I'm a teacher and I always get asked where I teach. I hate it. There's such a pressure on teachers atm. It's always followed up by someone the know who goes there and then makes me paranoid!

mumedu · 12/10/2024 05:53

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 02:08

But people on social media blank out their kids school jumper logos , I've seen it

That's totally different - it's got their face and their identity is exposed. I do think it's weird and I wonder why you are being so secretive.

KatyaKabanova · 12/10/2024 05:30

She knows your name, address and phone number. I think if she had some sort of terrible agenda, something would have happened by now. She couldn't get past school security anyway.

Sparklfairy · 12/10/2024 05:27

If it's a small town where people talk, I hate to tell you this, but your obdurate answer will get them talking more. What is she hiding? It was just small talk, has she got a crazy ex? Should we be worried in the community for our safety? The gossip will spread like wildfire.

I would say he goes to a completely different school. Then it's a socially acceptable answer that won't start the rumours, and you get to keep your privacy. Don't pick a different one every single time though - because you'll lose track

CurlewKate · 12/10/2024 05:19

Does he not wear uniform?

UserNameOfShame · 12/10/2024 05:16

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 02:08

But people on social media blank out their kids school jumper logos , I've seen it

Yeah and that's weird too. Your child may walk down the street in their uniform and people might see with their actual eyes 😮

LeontineFrance · 12/10/2024 04:47

Why not just say one of the local county schools which actually says nothing but does answer their question?

daisychain01 · 12/10/2024 04:21

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 02:08

But people on social media blank out their kids school jumper logos , I've seen it

Ridiculous! If a dodgy person with ill-intent is hellbent on getting into a school they 100% are not going to target their specific precious offspring, unless they're Prince George and they're looking for a chunky ransom.

Bournetilly · 12/10/2024 04:07

It’s strange not to say if you are already having a conversation with someone. The hairdresser isn’t a stranger off the street and I doubt she really cared what school he went to, she’s just making conversation.

liveforsummer · 12/10/2024 04:03

In a small town any and every stranger on the street will know what school he goes to due to the school uniform he's wearing anyway. Not sure why an acquaintance such as a hairdresser is any worse knowing

ToNiceWithSpice · 12/10/2024 03:58

They are just making small talk , they really don't care what school your child goes to. Well unless their child is going to soon and are likely to be going to the same one and want to know what you think about it

Sporadica · 12/10/2024 03:55

As a general principle - it's your child. No one is going to look out for him 100% of the time except for you and his other parent, if applicable. So if you genuinely feel that revealing a piece of information (to a member of the public, obviously not to relevant authorities) puts him at risk, act accordingly. His safety and privacy is more important than a stranger's or acquaintance's possible momentary discomfort at not being told. If I were on the receiving end, I'd respect your right to maintain boundaries even if they're not the same ones I'd set for giving info about my own children.

ItsTheGAGGGGGGGGG · 12/10/2024 03:54

I don’t think you need to tell people what school your child goes too if you don’t want too, it doesn’t exactly have anything to do with them

Dontsparethehorses · 12/10/2024 03:48

People blur logo out on social media but not when walking down the street! That’s the difference OP!

MsAmerica · 12/10/2024 03:44

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 01:59

I sometimes get strangers asking what primary school my son goes to if the topic comes up in conversation and I always prefer not to answer just from a safety and privacy POV. For example the hairdresser today asked and a few weeks ago, someone else that I don't know that well asked.
Is it weird to just say I prefer to keep his personal information private when someone asks?

Yes, it's weird if you're doing it out of paranoia that someone will kidnap him.

Wokkadema · 12/10/2024 03:14

If you're not going to answer I would suggest finding ways to deflect while maintaining a friendly conversation.
'Oh gosh, I am not here to talk about the kids, this is the only time I get to talk about grown up things! Have you seen the new Netflix series...'
'Oh are you trying to choose a school for your child? How old are they?'

NerrSnerr · 12/10/2024 03:13

I live in a small town and know what school most children go to without speaking to their parents. For primary the direction they're walking will tell you which school and secondary all the school blazers are different.

My hairdresser asked me today what secondary school my daughter wants to go to this morning. It's just small talk which she's doing hair, she doesn't actually care.

Original poster

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 03:05

@Changethetoner wow, that's awful, so sorry you had to go through that and yes I'm sure you wish you hadn't said what school your child went to but I'm sure you never imagined the man would be such a psycho!

OP posts:

Tourmalines · 12/10/2024 03:01

Weird

pasturesgreen · 12/10/2024 03:01

It's hardly a state secret, is it?

MumChp · 12/10/2024 02:58

Icicle90 · 12/10/2024 02:10

He has special needs and I just don't want anyone knowing his business, it's a small town

In a small town everyone knows anyway.

Don't be ridiculous.