To take my toddler to my growth scan? No childcare.

I agree.

When I was having my daughter, the scan waiting room was shared for lots of pregnancy related stuff so you could take kids in there, just not in the actual scan room. Not sure how that's helpful though :(

Sounds like my hospital, it is a terrible practice. During my extended infertility issues l had to go to one of those scans, had to wait ages to get booked in as the man in front wanted to argue about going into the 12 week scan with his pregnant partner. It was during COVID when scans were just the patient. He argued for ages, in the end they still said no -big surprise! I controlled myself and manage to not say can l just get checked in without this debate going round in circles and at least you can get pregnant.

Go on an app - sitters are good we used them a couple of times when desperate! - the sitter can come to the hospital and sit in the cafe w your child. Ideal if they can also meet beforehand if possible,
I should imagine the hospital would not allow the toddler in the scanning room/appt.

Our hospital had the twelve week scans and infertility scans in the same room. Yeah that was pleasant. Sorry about your experience. Sounds horrendous.

My hospital I took my 3 year olds to a few appointments as had nobody else and the midwife said it was fine they don’t ban children as all it does is stop people coming to important appointments and we live in quite a deprived area

@alba146

Hope it all works out for you x

This! My check up resulted in baby being born very premature. Had I left the hospital then I would’ve lost her. I was monitored for still birth from 21 weeks, no way would I chance walking out!

Experienced student? Wtf??

some people have had very sheltered lives.
as a CSA survivor, I am NEVER leaving my child alone with some rando, I don’t care if they’re on Bubble, how many DBS checks they show me, whatever. And people are going around “just get a sitter/student/neighbour”

beggars belief

This.

A friend had a situation where she had to unexpectedly stay in hospital and had nobody on hand to care for her one-year-old (this was before I met her). Her DD had to go into emergency foster care for the two nights then back to my friend once she left hospital. It happens. Some people literally have nobody on hand.

I've say in the cafe with other people 's children who didn't know me well on more than one occasion for similar things. Was always not a problem.

is there a parent at nursery who'd do that for you?

I was told they were very concerned about the health of my baby and if I left it would be against medical advice. Did they lock me to bed with handcuffs? No. Did I get the impression they'd probably call someone about me if I left? Yes. At the end of the day if you're told leaving would be risking the life of your baby you tend to stay.

My friends baby was in such bad shape they required resuscitation. Had she left rather than the crash section there is quite frankly 100% chance her baby would be dead.

@northernredrose I haven’t spoken to anyone about it. I did try to complain at the time but I wasn’t getting anywhere and just ended up leaving it as I was struggling with everything else that I had going on. I have paid for some private physio about a year ago when I had a chunk of time that I knew I’d be able to stick to regular appointments but unfortunately there wasn’t a great deal of improvement due to the time that’s passed.

We have no other children as I don’t know that my body would physically cope with another pregnancy. I think I’d end up on bedrest with a young child which just wouldn’t be possible.

Well it's no true that you " were not allowed" to leave now is it?

Yeah that I understand. I used to use Sitters occasionally for DS of an Evening but not a daytime scan which is what the issue is for OP

I’d contact them again and explain the situation and, if they still insist, explain you’ll need to cancel and rebook for another day. This isn’t an appointment you’ve had for weeks and just haven’t arranged anything, it’s a last minute one and you have tried but are unable to source appropriate childcare. It obviously is an important scan and you’d like to think that the consultant etc would be sympathetic to your situation and perhaps pull some strings to arrange the appt on a nursery day.

You really do need a plan for your toddler. A friend went in for a CTG due to medical issue. She didn't think anything wrong. 10 min after the CTG baby was born by EMCS.

One of my growth scans they weren't happy with growth and I got sent to triage to be monitored on CTG and not allowed to leave until it had been reviewed.

If you go there and you need something done right there and now, what you planning on doing with toddler?

@Gogogo12345
During the working week after school shift in the evenings when parents go to restaurants/ events etc

They will turn you away if you show up with toddler. My children were 12&10 and were not allowed to accompany me to NHS scans. One time I had brought them to one of my weekly scans and they were refused into the room, they were however allowed to wait in the waiting room due to their age.

When I went for a scan, there were a couple with a toddler. They all wanted to go in but the sonographer made the husband wait outside with the toddler and the lady had to go it alone.

I suspect they would turn you away.

Unless it's your 12 week scan, surely the rest aren't time dependent? I'd just rebook for when your husband / In-laws are back.

I missed growth scans during Covid because I had Covid and all was ok

Do you know anyone who uses a childminder who you could about theirs? Some childminders do offer add hoc slots? Worth asking.

I was a childminder very many years ago when my eldest was little, and minded two one year olds/ toddlers who's mums I met on my antenatal course. One was full time but the other's dad worked shifts and wanted to pick her up if it was his weekend-equivalent mid week. I then filled a lot of the slots they weren't using with ad hoc care for other mums I'd met at antenatal class who were sahm and occasionally friends of theirs - word of mouth acquaintances.

This is hard for you and I sympathise but I wish more places considered the dignity of all patients.

My local hospital has a joint waiting room for maternity and gynae oncology, so at my (2 hour overrun) appointment where I was waiting to find out if I had cancer on top of the emergency hysterectomy, I was surrounded by bumps, babies and toddlers. One woman had 3 under 5 and kept telling those who made eye contact, “don’t have children, it’s awful!”

The mums in there weren’t to know of course but I wasn’t the only woman silently crying, and to this day I think it takes a certain kind of sick mind to make those two groups share a waiting space.

tldr sometimes people other than mums need consideration too, and that’s OK.

Hope you can find a solution that doesn’t involve bringing your toddler.

During the working week though? Would she not be working as a TA at the time?