To wonder "who does that and why?!"

this happened to me too, my hubby made my mate pregnant, we had only been married a few months and i had just had his baby. she was ringing me up saying she met a nice guy, i would like him and all about them shagging etc. then i find out she is pregnant, and through the village grapevine find out it is my hubby! so i kick him out and tell him to go live with her. she had the nerve to wheel new baby over to me at the following year village carnival saying "oh we have something in common, both babies from him!" i had to walk away or i would have slapped her face! 30 yrs later she friend requests me on FB! her son and my daughter did meet up, (being half siblings)and the lad is is a nice chap (unlike the dad) ironically, a few yrs later he turned up at my door with massive bunch of flowers (after never paying penny maintenance , or xmas/birthday card for his kid) i was with someone new and also had new baby, begging for me to take him back because .... wait for it...... he got in from work found her shagging his mate on living room floor! ha ha ha ha! made my day hearing that taste of his own medicine, as you can imagine door then slammed in his face while i was laughing head off!

The woman my ex husband had a 3 year on and off affair with friend requested me and contacted me wanting to talk to me. Turned out it was a very positive thing. I found out she was unaware he was married for the first 2 years and only after I’d found out he was cheating with yet another woman (not her!) and chucked him out had he hoovered her back up and she had stupidly carried on. He mentally abused her in every way that he had abused me (narcissistic cycle of abuse) and so comparing notes helped us both to really learn that it was him, not us and started our recovery.

I suspect she was having a snoop and accidentally sent you a friend request! My ex partner did this with my now husband, when we were dating!! My husband blocked and removed the request. I wouldn't dwell on it, just remove the request (and block if you want).

Had a similar experience with Friends Reunited. A wife of an ex fiance contacted me. Bit of a surprise but she told me how lucky I was to have dumped him. He had become an abusive husband locked in the house. Locked the bathroom so she couldn't use the loo. Insisted he had to be in the bathroom when she showered or used the loo. Cut her off from her family and friends. It was horrible to read but I guess she needed to vent to someone who maybe new her husband. We have been in contact now And then since. Not often. He has turned her daughter against her and her daughter is now married to a controlling abusive man. Such is life.

Sounds nuts! The only logical explanation is that it was an accidental friend request. Unless she has a completely forgotten that she was screwing your boyfriend all those years ago. Either way, avoid!

There was a glitch recently on FB where if you looked at someone's profile it might send a friend request. Pretty sure they fixed it now but it was definitely happening.

After all this time she might not even realise? I had a very awkward situation years ago with something like this: A DH of a friend of my sister's - so someone I know well enough in that we've attended various parties/dinners with but not someone I know particularly well personally - put something on facebook that was vaguelly amusing. Someone had commented under it, and I put another comment under that one agreeing along lines of "Dave has it right - you're totall ymissing a trick here". or whatever.

The next thing, "Dave" is sending me a message going, "Wow, MsMarch, I can't believe it's you, how are you..."

I had managed to completely miss that "Dave" was a man I knew at uni who had almost date raped me after an alcohol fueled night. He had, the next day, realised his behaviour was totally not ok, and had apologised, but of course I'd never had anything to do with him ever again. When I had responded, 20 odd years later to this other post, I hadn't clocked that it was the same person. It was a fairly bog standard name, "Dave Jones" and the man with the original post was not someone I'd ever have known could have known this man.

I actually felt bad about it. He knew he'd behaved badly, he'd apologised, I'd like to think it taught him a lesson, and he probably thought that I had forgiven him when I posted on that post....

Possibly accidental, but anyway, you don't have to accept it. Just decline it or press ignore.

I'd accept her friend request so that she gets the notification and shits herself that her snooping error has been exposed. And then after a very short time i would delete and block 😂

Maybe she married him, had some children and has just realised he’s been cheating on her all these years. It’s made her want to apologise, so she can feel better.
Or she was stalking you and pressed it by accident.
Either way, just sack her off.

In the past I’ve nearly mistaken ‘people you may know’ as a friend request and my ‘acceptance’ of their request meant that I actually sent them a request. Luckily the algorithm got it right and I did know them and all good. But Jesus…..imagine if it was someone contentious

A guy I had a very brief fling with when online dating about eight years ago (we went on three dates, shagged once, he briefly ghosted me before popping back up) still tried to add me on every available platform even though I have blocked and deleted him to kingdom come.

Hes just tried to follow me on threads. We have had no contact whatsoever since then and I have been in a relationship with someone for 7 years. He tried to add me on Facebook, the tried under a different name, did the same with Instagram. It’s borderline stalker behaviour but not completely abnormal.

I think a lot of people feel friending people is like saying hello. It’s just what you do in their eyes. They forget all the pain and the drama and just chalk it down as “someone I know”.

I don’t think there’s anything sinister about it, it’s just a sign of a shallow person with no sense of ownership over their own behaviour.

She’s probably stalking you and pressed ‘add friend’ by accident 🙂

I’m glad you cleared that up! I was like wow what an interesting use if ‘meaty’ maybe I’ll try that some time…. Phew

Check your message requests and spam messages some people friend request to try to get their messages seen by you

I said a fair few things that I'm not going to repeat here as I've related this story to a lot of people in real life!

*mean, not meaty!

People are strange. My ex-best friend who bullied me horrifically at university tries to add me on instagram periodically (I'm private) and on Facebook even though we parted ways horribly and I immediately deleted every trace of her from my life (this was over 10 years ago). I think especially when it's the person who did the meaty thing, the pain was so much less for them that they don't realise that what they're doing is inappropriate and strange. She probably thinks of you as a long-lost acquaintance! I can only assume in my case that she doesn't remember quite how horrific she was to me and thinks in some strange way that we just lost touch...

A girl who had made my life a living hell at school for dating someone she fancied approached me in a pub 25 years later and acted like we were old friends. She even introduced me to her partner telling him we used to hang out together at a local venue (We did not. As soon as she came in I'd leave because I was terrified her and her friends would rip my hair out again.) There was no embarrassment and I genuinely believe she'd forgotten. I said to her "You didn't like me much back then" to which she looked taken aback and said "Course I did!"

This completely, she probably hasn’t even realised but will be massively embarrassed when/if she realises!!