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Original poster

Why are teachers so rude?

187 replies

Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:14

I will preface this by saying I do not have kids and therefore my last interaction with teachers was when I was at school. I'm not going to let my teenage years cloud my judgement.

I have recently taken on a job that involves visiting schools (think cleaning supervisor, but not) I spend a couple of hours walking round with the team, talking about challenges, reviewing paperwork and doing a general checks. I don't have to interact with the teaching staff at all (thank god). But I find them so rude. They think nothing of just butting in mid conversation, no "sorry, I can see your talking, could I just ask X a question" they just start talking. They stare with a frown constantly and consistently. They don't thank you or the children for holding doors open for them. And they never smile back if you smile at them...

It takes me back to being at school all those years ago and now I wonder if it wasn't just me hating the place. I wonder if the teachers were all like that too.

This isn't an isolated incident. I travel to many schools and they are all the same...

OP posts:
Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:50

Paisleydad · 10/10/2024 07:45

My son in law is a teacher. I've asked him about this.

I'm told it's in his contract that he must take every opportunity to seek out visitors to the school and find ways of being rude to them. Butting in is one of the most common techniques apparently. Others include talking about visitors within earshot and blocking cars in in the car park.

They have a Visitor Rudeness Form to fill out. This is a key performance indicator requiring monthly returns to Dept of Education and contributes positively to school league tables.

Apparently, it's something of a struggle to maintain a lead over the counter-balancing measure of pupils and parents being rude to teachers.

Ha maybe so.

Don't start me on car parking... not sure where they thought all the teachers would park when they built those tiny car parks!

OP posts:
BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:48

@Paisleydad - thank you for that information. I'm wondering if ofsted have a rude-o-meter so that they can gauge everyday rudeness in schools?
About half a million teachers to ensure consistent rudeness is quite a task.

Paisleydad · 10/10/2024 07:45

My son in law is a teacher. I've asked him about this.

I'm told it's in his contract that he must take every opportunity to seek out visitors to the school and find ways of being rude to them. Butting in is one of the most common techniques apparently. Others include talking about visitors within earshot and blocking cars in in the car park.

They have a Visitor Rudeness Form to fill out. This is a key performance indicator requiring monthly returns to Dept of Education and contributes positively to school league tables.

Apparently, it's something of a struggle to maintain a lead over the counter-balancing measure of pupils and parents being rude to teachers.

SidekickSylvia · 10/10/2024 07:45

We're really busy.

Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:45

Firenzeflower · 10/10/2024 07:40

The moment a cleani g supervisor arrives I stop what I'm doing and bow.

I was just thinking about schools and cleaning companies. How appallingly they treat their cleaners, how they lie to schools about what they will provide v what actually happens. They expect cleaners to clean huge areas under a lot of pressure. All the cleaners over the years who have cleaned my classroom have been lovely. I always get them a present at the end of term and get to know them.
But the company and supervisors are unrealistic and often downright lie. They are all about getting contracts by lying and exploiting hard working cleaners.

You're not wrong. They under quote and over promise. The cleaning, catering, maintenance, caretaking staff all do a wonderful job that is often looked down on and let down by their management company.

OP posts:
SmileEachDay · 10/10/2024 07:43

And it's unfair to tar everyone with the same brush

And yet that’s what you decided to do.

Sometimes, when people who don’t work in schools come in, they don’t see that everything needs doing at lightening speed. If you were “deep in conversation”, perhaps you hadn’t noticed someone waiting for a pause so they could get something done.

BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:43

That's terrible about the cleaning companies, @Firenzeflower . It makes me wonder if they're using low waged and migrant workers to increase profit with no consideration for their workforce?
See, OP? We can all draw conclusions which may or may not be fair, based on limited information.

DoreenonTill8 · 10/10/2024 07:42

stravagante · 10/10/2024 07:16

I was once told, by a very wise mentor that if I was regularly finding everyone around me to be an arsehole then the problem wasn't them, it was me.

I've worked in loads of schools and they've had their fair share of idiots but most folk are nice. Like in the rest of life.

This and also the 'are you meant to be where you are for the times you are?' posts.
How long ago did you leave school that you're still holding on to this resentment?
From your last post We were deep in conversation yesterday about a troubling incident to be rudely interrupted by a teacher
Are you working with pupils at risk of being excluded who share your resentment of teachers?

BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:41

Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:40

Abrasive is not a bad description.

Show quote history

...all teachers, that you have ever met?

Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:40

DibDabDoh · 10/10/2024 07:40

I have quite a few teachers in my family. They are lovely people but can be pretty bossy and abrasive. I think they generally have to be this way to cope with the job! It can be annoying.

Abrasive is not a bad description.

OP posts:
Firenzeflower · 10/10/2024 07:40

The moment a cleani g supervisor arrives I stop what I'm doing and bow.

I was just thinking about schools and cleaning companies. How appallingly they treat their cleaners, how they lie to schools about what they will provide v what actually happens. They expect cleaners to clean huge areas under a lot of pressure. All the cleaners over the years who have cleaned my classroom have been lovely. I always get them a present at the end of term and get to know them.
But the company and supervisors are unrealistic and often downright lie. They are all about getting contracts by lying and exploiting hard working cleaners.

BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:40

Gazelda · 10/10/2024 07:38

The teachers I know are compassionate, caring, funny, kind, generous, tired, overworked, underappreciated, and demoralised.

They all put on a friendly face when I see them, which can often crumble when I ask how life's going.

Get to know them better and you might see a warmer side.

Yes, that's always been my experience. Plus, mostly, they always give over and above, in my experience as a parent.

Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:40

Gazelda · 10/10/2024 07:38

The teachers I know are compassionate, caring, funny, kind, generous, tired, overworked, underappreciated, and demoralised.

They all put on a friendly face when I see them, which can often crumble when I ask how life's going.

Get to know them better and you might see a warmer side.

You might be right. Maybe because I am there during the school day it is a very stressful time and I don't see the best of them...

OP posts:
DibDabDoh · 10/10/2024 07:40

I have quite a few teachers in my family. They are lovely people but can be pretty bossy and abrasive. I think they generally have to be this way to cope with the job! It can be annoying.

Gazelda · 10/10/2024 07:38

The teachers I know are compassionate, caring, funny, kind, generous, tired, overworked, underappreciated, and demoralised.

They all put on a friendly face when I see them, which can often crumble when I ask how life's going.

Get to know them better and you might see a warmer side.

ShowOfHands · 10/10/2024 07:38

Happily, I and my colleagues are some of the friendliest people I've ever met.

The only common denominator is you during these interactions. Maybe you're misreading situations?

Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:38

GoldyHorn · 10/10/2024 07:35

So everyone around you in all different places is a twat and you are not a twat?

No I'm not a Twat. I am there for maybe an hour. I walk around with the team and I leave... I'd have no interactions with them really. I am polite, respectful of their areas and I'm doing a job to try to help their environment.

OP posts:
Onand · 10/10/2024 07:36

If this is happening often - I’d say the issue is you, OP.

BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:36

"it's unfair to tar everyone with the same brush"
So get MN to change the title of your thread.
Talk about unfair generalisations.

GoldyHorn · 10/10/2024 07:35

So everyone around you in all different places is a twat and you are not a twat?

Original poster
Van34 · 10/10/2024 07:34

It's a complicated job, but the teams I visit I do not directly supervise. Cleaning supervisor was a bad example... I actually work for a different company so they wouldn't know who I was. I am by nature, a very friendly smiley person and have never encountered this in any other public sector area.

Agree that there are some schools that are worse than others. And it's unfair to tar everyone with the same brush. But it is unfortunately, more common than not.

We were deep in conversation yesterday about a troubling incident to be rudely interrupted by a teacher (who didn't apologise) wanting to know if they could hang a flag off the railing... not exactly urgent or safeguarding information.

OP posts:
BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:33

Treat people how you want to be treated. Teachers, nurses, bus drivers, supermarket staff, whoever. Be reasonable, be polite, be respectful.
You'll find, with rare exceptions, people will be the same to you.

BeatrizBoniface · 10/10/2024 07:30

Ivyn · 10/10/2024 07:16

What a horrible post.

Isn't it? Why so unpleasant, negative and goady about an entire profession? Quite unnecessary.

Pumpkincozynights · 10/10/2024 07:30

I also imagine it’s because they often don’t get real breaks. They are often having to supervise the shitty kids being held in detention. Or do extra in their lunch break such as remedial work.

SmileEachDay · 10/10/2024 07:29

conversation, no "sorry, I can see your talking, could I just ask X a question" they just start talking

Can you give a specific example of the actual thing a teacher has started talking about?

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