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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want him to complain in restaurants?

211 replies

FirecrackerK · 09/10/2024 11:19

My DP is really into his food, makes most meals at home and even thought about being a chef when he was younger. It's a hobby.

But I'd say 60% of the time when we're out for a meal, if the server asks 'how was your meal?' he doesnt give the obligatory response.

Instead he uses it as an opportunity to moan about the carrots of the gravy or whatever and say 'it could've been more X'. I feel really embarrassed when he does this as other diners are just quietly enjoying their meals!

He stopped for a while because he knew it bothered me but he's back at it again

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Precipice · 09/10/2024 11:26

How often are you going out for meals? It doesn't seem worthwhile. I find that I often begrudge the money, because I could make a meal I liked much more for much less. For this reason, I rarely eat at restaurants.

Cheesecakecookie · 09/10/2024 11:26

God I knew a woman like this. Awful.

“tell the chef x doesn’t go with y - too strongly flavoured”

FirecrackerK · 09/10/2024 11:25

@Blusterydaytodaypoohbear well I can at least say DP is generous and wouldn't be paying in small change!

But I do have moments of thinking, can I put up with dining like this forever. Just once id like him to say fine or good, and leave it at that

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ComtesseDeSpair · 09/10/2024 11:25

As long as he isn’t rude then I think it’s fine: they are asking for feedback on the meal, he is offering his opinion that the cooking time wasn’t quite right / seasoning could be better / more gravy on the side as an option would be appreciated. If you’re paying for a meal and there’s something wrong with it, the chef generally wants to know.

I think it’s a very British thing, to be unhappy with something but refuse to say so. All my non-Brit friends give restaurant feedback perfectly readily.

FirecrackerK · 09/10/2024 11:24

Honestly @PaperGloves we aren't.

He's doing this in very good restaurants. In the Michelin book level or actual Michelin in one case!

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Blusterydaytodaypoohbear · 09/10/2024 11:24

My friend's dh used to make complaints about friend's food even when she was happy with it! It was so cringe.. He used to pay their portion of the bill in small change... Stopped at 2 meals out..... Never again. She divorced him. He refused to have his dd once when she was off school unless she sent dd with a tin of soup from her cupboard...

FirecrackerK · 09/10/2024 11:23

It makes me cringe. I hear the question and worriedly anticipate the response 😂

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PaperGloves · 09/10/2024 11:23

But why are you regularly eating out in sub-par restaurants? If he’s foodie, why not eat out only in great places, doing it less often if necessary? DH used to work in food, and is very fastidious, and eats out a lot, but I can think of vanishingly few times where he’s made negative comments to staff.

FirecrackerK · 09/10/2024 11:22

@RampantIvy he usually only does it it in really good restaurants now I think about it.

So I would say fussy.

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forgotmypassagain · 09/10/2024 11:20

Haha yes this would annoy me 😂

RampantIvy · 09/10/2024 11:20

Is he really overly fussy or are you eating in restaurants that aren't very good?