To feel rubbish about this - breastfeeding groups

I think you are being a bit touchy, I think, rather than unreasonable. But it is an odd thing to do, and handing out certificates for breastfeeding is simply weird.

I completely agree.

They probably won’t.

These same women will all feed their kids macdonalds and coke before they are three.
And think it's ok for their kids to smoke weed at 13 in the park. And be drinking vodka at 15.

Of course there is societal pressure to breastfeed. You only have to look at the endless threads on mumsnet devoted to the subject to see that. If there was no pressure or judgement around the subject then these threads would not exist, people would make there own individual feeding choices and that would be the end of it. Yet here we are again.

I got massive PND from not being able to breastfeed and ironically enough got free counselling that was held in a room with posters on the wall saying ‘Breast is Best’ it triggered an anxiety attack and the counsellor removed them. In my case I was sick of it being shoved down my throat.

After a c section I didn’t plan and not being to breastfeed I came to the conclusion that I survived and so did baby and that was a ducking miracle - many others aren’t so lucky

Ffs who wants a certificate for that?! I was lucky I could breast feed although with twins it was an endurance challenge that I stuck to because I felt I was failing them. More of a sign I had pnd rather than I was super mum. It’s patronising, smug behaviour. I bet half of them have McDonald’s before they are 3. Op, there’s so much more to dc health. No dc turns to their dm as an adult and says “I wish you’d breast fed me longer”!

The vast majority of women start out breastfeeding. There’s definitely societal pressure to do it during pregnancy, even if a woman doesn’t want to.

It’s also a reason why so many women feel guilty when they stop breastfeeding for whatever reason.

How is there societal pressure to do it when the vast majority of women don't? Formula is normalised, breastfeeding is not.

Is it always a case though that most women who intend to breastfeed stop because of lack of support or formula marketing techniques though? While I don't doubt those are factors, is it also not a case of many of those 85% of new mothers who intended to breast feed found that in reality they simply did not want to do it? They disliked the feeling of it or underestimated the demands of it? However, the societal pressure to do it is huge so when asked why they are not breast feeding they will resort to saying things like 'oh, I can't produce enough' or 'my milk took too long to come in' rather than simply admitting 'I just don't want to.' As I said earlier in the thread, I formula fed from the start so none of this applied to me and when asked I would always state that I had chosen formula, but maybe women who change their minds feel under pressure to give an acceptable reason.

I wanted to check the statistics posted on the thread which led me to this site

https://www.unicef.org.uk/babyfriendly/about/breastfeeding-in-the-uk/

More than half of mothers were still breastfeeding at 6 weeks and over a third at six months.
81% of new mothers started breastfeeding
Just 1% were still exclusively breastfeeding at 6 months

Although it also says that 8 out of 10 women stopped breastfeeding before they wanted to. But I'm not sure that we should hold women to a decision they made before baby arrived and before they knew if it was even possible. Alternatives are good for mothers and babies who either can't breastfeed at all or who can only breastfeed at significant cost to the mother. Exclusive breastfeeding seems a very high bar to set.

Like I said, more support for those who want to breastfeed is needed.

Those who don’t want to though should be left alone after an initial discussion.

And I still stand by the fact it's bad that many women are forced to formula feed.

OP just to reassure you that you don’t ever have to justify why your DD is bottle fed. I felt the need to do this with DC1 and looking back it truly was not anyone’s business ♥️

I agree that those who want to breastfeed need more support.

Not everyone wants to breastfeed though and I still stand by the fact that it’s good that women aren’t forced to breastfeed. Formula is a wonderful invention.

OP, for what it’s worth, I genuinely think that what you feed your child from weaning age, until they are grown up, has a much, MUCH bigger impact on their overall health than breast milk as an infant.

My experience was kind of like this. I wanted to BF but the midwives in the hospital didn’t have a clue. They tried to pressure me in to giving him a bottle and wouldn’t let me go home until we had ‘established’ BF… it was strongly hinted that I could go home and ‘give up a bed’ if I switched to formula. I pumped and pumped to feed him what I had but I had no idea about colostrum and how you only produce a tiny amount of it so I thought nothing was coming out. Another said I only had to feed him every three hours and not to bother waking in the night to do it. Another said ‘even if he only latches for a minute that will probably be enough. He may just want to play with your nipple’
They were useless and he was tiny.
We got home and I still struggled until I fortunately was able to access some good advice. Luckily for us, it was a simple size issue. My boobs were too big for his tiny mouth to latch on to. Simple fix was to hand express a small amount before I fed him to ‘soften’ my boobs and then it was easy to shove my nipple in his mouth. From then on it was so much easier (apart from cluster feeding and sore nipples and thrush and all that other wonderful stuff!)

No, they certainly aren't- in fact, given ~85% of women state a wish to exclusively breastfeed and only about ~1% end up doing so, I'd say it's quite the opposite and women are forced to formula feed by inadequate education and support, along with increasingly sophisticated and insidious formula company marketing techniques.

It’s also a miracle in that it gives women a choice. Thankfully women aren’t forced to breastfeed if they don’t want to.

Humanity wouldn't have survived if babies didn't know how to breastfeed. In countries where breastfeeding support is properly funded, breastfeeding rates are much higher, despite the fact that babies are the same worldwide, and breasts are the same worldwide. There are a very tiny number of women who cannot breastfeed and a very tiny number of babies who cannot latch, for whatever reason. Formula is a lifesaving miracle for that tiny number of babies, who in the past would likely have died.

Hardly. I didn't think I was going to feed past 2. My son is 2.5.

This was almost my reply 😂

Quite frankly being 'awarded' for feeding your own baby is really weird!

It's up there with '100% school attendance' awards. Like congratulations you wonderful child for not catching a tummy bug or needing your tonsils out this year?!

@ChiffandBipper I paid £1,000 on a lactation consultant who actually knew what she was doing and she got me and baby to learn how to breastfeed. I called her on day 2 from hospital when I realized the midwives in hospital and HVs were absolutely clueless and just pressured me to formula feed for an easy life. My baby is 6 weeks old and breastfeeding is going amazingly. That consultant will forever be my hero. So yes, I find midwives nowadays know fuck all about breastfeeding anymore and a bit of knowledge really does help.