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Not allowing heavily pregnant woman to use a loo

665 replies

pelvicfloorisnomore · 08/10/2024 10:38

I’m imminently due my third baby and have a massive bump. Popped to the local coop post school run and as I was checking out was desperate for the loo. My pelvic floor is pretty shot from previous 2 kids, the baby had dropped during the school run walk so I was feeling like I could not wait. The store was empty bar a couple of pensioners. I asked if I could use the staff loo as desperate, there are no other loos nearby and I was unlikely to make it the half a mile home in time. The member of staff said no against policy and I soiled myself before I even made it the front door of the shop. Completely humiliating and had to walk home like that and could have been avoided if a little kindness shown.

AIBU to expect some flexibility in branch policy to accommodate for those in need? It hardly fits with the coop key value of caring for others.

OP posts:
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wombat15 · 10/10/2024 12:06

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 11:52

@wombat15 you just don't get it. Every co op I go in has barely any staff. They simply don't have someone available to escort people to the staff toilet unless they close the store.
If a staff member does this for one person - they will become expected to do it for everyone who has an "emergency" need. Then there would be far more complaints that the doors were locked and a "back in five minutes" sign on the door several times a day.
What is needed is many many more actual public toilets.

Many people including me have mentioned letting people with a medical need use the staff toilet on the odd occasion. It doesn't open the flood gates and if there aren't enough staff it is easy to say so.

Boxoo · 10/10/2024 11:59

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 10:55

Not always ideal but I haven't worked anywhere where it is dangerous to go to the toilet.

Not ideal can still mean not suitable for the public. It's not suitable for the staff either but often times it just is what it is at a job and the staff make do.
It's not "dangerous" to the level of needing a hard hat to squeeze down a small corridor packed high with boxes that could fall or up a narrow flight of steep stairs with a roof leak making it slippery and a loo with a broken seat and full of cleaning supplies so you have to sit at an angle etc.
These aren't dangerous to a high level. But it's not appropriate to allow a pregnant woman or small children.
It shouldn't be appropriate for staff either. But the fact is there are places like that and unless you can find a new job a lot of people have no choice.

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 11:52

@wombat15 you just don't get it. Every co op I go in has barely any staff. They simply don't have someone available to escort people to the staff toilet unless they close the store.
If a staff member does this for one person - they will become expected to do it for everyone who has an "emergency" need. Then there would be far more complaints that the doors were locked and a "back in five minutes" sign on the door several times a day.
What is needed is many many more actual public toilets.

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 11:16

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 11:07

@rainraingoaway91 aren't co-op shops franchises? Or at least under different regional managements?
Anyway....it doesn't matter what the official policy might be. Sales assistants are there to sell and restock goods not escort people to the lav.
Harsh. But true.

Obviously selling and restocking is part of the job but most company also want sales assistants to be polite and helpful (within reason) to their customers, especially the regular ones. There won't be much selling and restocking if regular customers go elsewhere because assistants are rude and unhelpful.

MooseBreath · 10/10/2024 11:15

I am sorry that happened to you OP. I remember what it was like in late pregnancy, and sometimes with the best planning possible, there is still an urgent need for the toilet. Some people are being horrible to you.

No, it's not the fault of the employees, as they could lose their jobs. But it is something that companies should be considering. Suppose you had an accident in the shop, then slipped and injured yourself? Surely it would be safer and more reasonable to let a visibly pregnant woman use the loo.

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 11:07

@rainraingoaway91 aren't co-op shops franchises? Or at least under different regional managements?
Anyway....it doesn't matter what the official policy might be. Sales assistants are there to sell and restock goods not escort people to the lav.
Harsh. But true.

rainraingoaway91 · 10/10/2024 11:04

lazyarse123 · 08/10/2024 17:20

Well I just retired from coop and we always let pregnant ladies and kids use the loo. We go with them even though they can't access the money or anything valuable. We leave that up the fucking shoplifters and their bags for life.

Just highlighting this post again for the posters in the back who keep harping on about their wrong assumptions of the Coop's policy

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 10:58

@wombat15 I never needed a hard hat but loading bays can be busy with very large roll cages which are temporarily all over the place when the delivery is being bought in.

marcopront · 10/10/2024 10:57

@wombat15

Not always ideal but I haven't worked anywhere where it is dangerous to go to the toilet.

But can you understand that there will be places where it is.

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 10:55

Fluufer · 10/10/2024 10:41

Having worked in 100s of shops, I would think you wouldn't be surprised to learn that the working conditions aren't always ideal 😂

Not always ideal but I haven't worked anywhere where it is dangerous to go to the toilet.

Fluufer · 10/10/2024 10:41

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 10:40

I very much doubt the staff in local shops need hi-vis or hard hats and if there are boxes piled everywhere it isn't safe for anyone including staff.

Having worked in 100s of shops, I would think you wouldn't be surprised to learn that the working conditions aren't always ideal 😂

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 10:40

Boxoo · 10/10/2024 10:10

Safe for staff and safe for the public doesn't always mean the same thing though does it? If the staff toilet is on a building site or warehouse where you need to wear hi-vis or hard hats etc. So of course it's safe for trained staff wearing those things. It isn't safe for the public.
And honestly let's face it, "safe" doesn't always happen in many places anyway. Staff may not technically be meant to pile up 50 boxes balanced precariously in a tiny corridor, but sometimes it happens. Staff overworked doing 10 different things pile them up to deal with later. And at that moment the pregnant lady wants to squeeze down the corridor to the loo.
Obviously in most cases this won't be the issue. But to say all staff toilets will always be via a "safe" route isn't true.

I very much doubt the staff in local shops need hi-vis or hard hats and if there are boxes piled everywhere it isn't safe for anyone including staff.

Boxoo · 10/10/2024 10:10

eggandonion · 10/10/2024 09:32

There should be safe routes especially to fire exits. I can't think of anywhere Ihave worked...in 45 years....which wouldn't have a safe route to the staff toilets.
I have had to go upstairs or downstairs and through loading bays and packing departments at times.
And if I don't want to take someone I can refuse. But to refuse a pregnant woman who is a regular customer...no way.

Safe for staff and safe for the public doesn't always mean the same thing though does it? If the staff toilet is on a building site or warehouse where you need to wear hi-vis or hard hats etc. So of course it's safe for trained staff wearing those things. It isn't safe for the public.
And honestly let's face it, "safe" doesn't always happen in many places anyway. Staff may not technically be meant to pile up 50 boxes balanced precariously in a tiny corridor, but sometimes it happens. Staff overworked doing 10 different things pile them up to deal with later. And at that moment the pregnant lady wants to squeeze down the corridor to the loo.
Obviously in most cases this won't be the issue. But to say all staff toilets will always be via a "safe" route isn't true.

GiantHornets · 10/10/2024 09:44

She can pee in the street if she likes - pregnant women can pee anywhere under most by-laws

hahaha can you post a by law to prove that? Can a pregnant woman pee in my front garden? Do I have to let her into my house?

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 09:40

eggandonion · 10/10/2024 09:32

There should be safe routes especially to fire exits. I can't think of anywhere Ihave worked...in 45 years....which wouldn't have a safe route to the staff toilets.
I have had to go upstairs or downstairs and through loading bays and packing departments at times.
And if I don't want to take someone I can refuse. But to refuse a pregnant woman who is a regular customer...no way.

That is how I would feel. I worked in 100s of shops and can't think of anywhere where I couldn't have accompanied someone with a medical need to the toilet on the very rare occasion someone asked.

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 09:38

Auburngal · 10/10/2024 09:29

My previous job (remember I left last week) was at a supermarket. We had a customer toilet which is frequently closed due to people pissing on the floor, ramming toilet with so much loo roll.

We don’t allow customers to use staff toilets as they are right at the back of the staff area and therefore walk past £000s of pounds of stock.

Those on water tablets - knew people who took them. They were told not to take them when they were travelling etc

So you think people with conditions that mean they can't wait should stay at home and never go anywhere?🙄

eggandonion · 10/10/2024 09:32

There should be safe routes especially to fire exits. I can't think of anywhere Ihave worked...in 45 years....which wouldn't have a safe route to the staff toilets.
I have had to go upstairs or downstairs and through loading bays and packing departments at times.
And if I don't want to take someone I can refuse. But to refuse a pregnant woman who is a regular customer...no way.

Auburngal · 10/10/2024 09:29

My previous job (remember I left last week) was at a supermarket. We had a customer toilet which is frequently closed due to people pissing on the floor, ramming toilet with so much loo roll.

We don’t allow customers to use staff toilets as they are right at the back of the staff area and therefore walk past £000s of pounds of stock.

Those on water tablets - knew people who took them. They were told not to take them when they were travelling etc

wombat15 · 10/10/2024 09:21

Needmorelego · 09/10/2024 22:10

@ThatRareUmberJoker that's ok then if they had the staff available.
My point was that so many shops simply don't so it's probably easier to have a blanket rule of no.
(I don't believe the OP said how many staff members were there though)

Or say yes to the very tiny number of people who ask and ha e a medical need.

Needmorelego · 10/10/2024 09:15

@AW24 safely can just mean knowing where the back fire exits are.
Unless you are given a tour of the backshop how would you know that?

Tdcp · 10/10/2024 09:15

AW24 · 10/10/2024 08:55

If it’s not safe for one human, customer or staff. Then it’s not safe for another, staff should have a safe working environment. Therefore it should AlWAYS BE SAFE!!!
So go annoy someone else today! I’m not in the mood for you!

Our toilets are through a loading bay, it is not safe for the general public to be in the loading bay and it is against our insurance policy to have members of the public in the loading bay. It is safe for staff because we are trained on the risks such as forklift trucks / pallet trucks being used for one example. Just because something is not safe for the public it doesn't mean it's not safe for staff.

AW24 · 10/10/2024 08:55

marcopront · 10/10/2024 08:39

I'm amazed that you know the layout of the back rooms of every shop in the country.

How else do you know they can always do it safely?

If it’s not safe for one human, customer or staff. Then it’s not safe for another, staff should have a safe working environment. Therefore it should AlWAYS BE SAFE!!!
So go annoy someone else today! I’m not in the mood for you!

marcopront · 10/10/2024 08:39

AW24 · 09/10/2024 23:43

I've been in many a shop Where they let my child.
They accompanied us.

They can safely if they want.

I'm amazed that you know the layout of the back rooms of every shop in the country.

How else do you know they can always do it safely?

AW24 · 09/10/2024 23:45

@pelvicfloorisnomore
I think you're fighting a losing battle here 🤪

AW24 · 09/10/2024 23:43

I've been in many a shop Where they let my child.
They accompanied us.

They can safely if they want.