Not allowing heavily pregnant woman to use a loo

How could I plan better? Buy adult incontinence pads!

I'm sorry this happened but YABU! They are staff toilets, not public. For all you know, they get requests daily like this- my child needs the loo, I have IBS, my husband can't wait etc etc. Where would they draw the line? Well they draw draw that line for EVERYONE!

I bought a She-Wee, practiced using it in the shower, then carried it around with me and discreetly wee'd on bushes and trees when needed. I travelled for work up until 39+3 so couldn't always find toilets when I needed them.

So sorry, OP. Be kind to yourself today x

Yes you are being unreasonable. It’s policy. That’s all you need to understand. The staff member could and would get into a world of trouble if they let you in unauthorised areas-especially if you were to trip. You know your limitations, you know your medical conditions, it’s on you to plan things and have a contingency in place. An employee shouldn’t face a disciplinary and potential dismissal for gross misconduct for your benefit

OP is probably aware of what she is and what she isn't. You're not being funny, you're being rude.

They should have let you use the staff toilet. When I worked in retail we often did.

Wow cut to the chase

It’s nothing to do with the kindness of the staff, they have to do their job and could potentially be sacked by allowing this. Is the slight inconvenience of wearing tena lady for a few months worth someone’s job?

I have bowel disease and completely understand the need for urgency when it comes to toilets, but I wouldn’t put staff in compromising position. I use the appropriate sanitary products when I have a flare up. Is it nice? Not really, but it’s better than the alternative.

I do empathise as I have a medical condition and can confirm the urgency when there's no loo is awful. It's not the shops fault though, not only is it for insurance reasons, but often the loos are up stairs and well within the staff area- it's just not appropriate to let non staff back there and I wouldn't expect anyone to risk their job for it.

Ive worked in a Co Op. There will be one toilet and that’s near where high value stock is stored (spirits, cigarettes, wine etc) and where the safes are.

Im sorry this happened but it’ll be nothing personal or lack of empathy. They probably don’t have enough staff to monitor a customer being in that area.

It’s pretty obvious the OP means she wet herself.

Did posting this make you feel good about yourself? Did it contribute anything positive to anyone's day? Or did you just make a woman's already horrible morning that little bit worse?

Sorry to hear about your troubles, OP. I'm heavily pregnant too, and sympathise xx

They would have had to sign you in as a visitor, explain the fire evacuation policy and remove a member of staff from the floor to escort you.
Members of the public can't go wandering around the staff areas of shops.

During covid I was waiting for my appointment about my food allergies/possible celiacs. They didn’t let me use the loo. I had to shit in a bush. I then missed my appointment.
I feel your pain OP.

I had a lot of cough/sneeze incontinence during the end of my last pregnancy, I just had to wear tena pads most days unfortunately. I was once allowed to use the staff toilet in a primark, so it is always worth asking, just in case- just be prepared to be told no.

Return home and go back out. I'm not being funny, you are pregnant not disabled.

Aww, that's really horrible op.
I also feel like the shop staff are caught between two considerations there and could have gone either way understandably.
I think many people would have done the kind thing, and I'm sorry you had to go through that.
The world is a hard place these days with little trust for others ((for good reason often), sadly the bad apples have spoilt the barrel for others.

Yes probably the school would be a better bet than the co op

I used to work in the coop and someone got fired for letting a member of the public into the back area to use a loo! It's 100% the insurance element unfortunately.

I don’t think the co op is at fault - the fact there are no public loos these days is not on them.

Can your husband not leave you the car for the rest of your pregnancy and get to work on public transport? And when the baby is tiny too. If it’s so rural there’s no way of him doing this, is being a one car family really practical?

Adult nappies also sound sensible until the baby comes, esp if so imminent.

Im assuming you mean wet yourself rather than soiled?

Why didn’t you ask at the school where they know you? You would probably have had a more sympathetic response. I am sorry this happened though, one of the joys of being a woman. Make sure you do your pelvic floor exercises post birth.

Buy a pack of incontinence pants just to see you through until you have the baby.

I'm sorry this happened, but In those types of shops the toilets are usually behind locked doors, where the stock is kept and safes etc. allowing an unauthorised person back there would probably cost someone their job. I'd be hugely sympathetic to you though.

When you say 'soiled' yourself are you talking about faeces? If so, I would probably speak to the GP about this- urinary incontinence is understandable in pregnancy with the bump on the bladder but I'm not sure faecal incontinence is expected in pregnancy.