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Things DP said to me while on holiday

641 replies

noodlewoo · 08/10/2024 07:01

Commented on what I was wearing to the airport. He said “you could have made more of an effort. “look at all these girls wearing trendy clothes. You need to start wearing clothes like that” I mean we literally had just got to the airport to go on holiday. Not a great start

Then when we got there he continued to point out what other women were wearing. “I like those gym leggings and sets” Don’t you wish you could wear stuff like that”

Continued to remind me that when we get home I need to get back on my diet. Maybe this is where I’m being sensitive because he said “for your sake not mine”

Then he asked if he thought people would put us together. Wasn’t sure what he meant so I asked him. He said well do you think people would think either of us were punching.

I sometimes have trouble with my back where it “goes” We were on a boat trip and when it was time to get off and stand up I said ouch and told him my back had a little twinge. He said “don’t start”

Then on the morning we were due to go home I came on my period and said I was “angin” for people who don’t know what that means it basically means disgusting

I’ve come home feeling a bit shitty and unloved but I’m not sure if I’m being over sensitive. Seems like he possibly doesn’t find me attractive which if that’s the case then fair enough but how would this make others feel?

OP posts:
speedmop · 08/10/2024 07:24

So this all came out of the blue and otherwise he’s a loving and supportive partner?

please say no kids involved

ExtraOnions · 08/10/2024 07:24

What do you say back to him when he says there things ?

”dress smarter for the airport”
”I was following your lead”

”would people put us together”
”probably not, as I’m such a catch”

You don’t need to be passive in this.

dayslikethese1 · 08/10/2024 07:24

LTB; he's basically saying he thinks you're not good looking enough for him, that's horrible.

noodlewoo · 08/10/2024 07:24

And to top it off he said all this on my birthday🤣 it gets better

OP posts:
Gettoachiro · 08/10/2024 07:24

He is way, way way below your level. He needs to be shipped out with comments like this or, given your life together, a complete change in attitude and with how he speaks and treats you, starting from now.

Blooming awful.

noodlewoo · 08/10/2024 07:23

So we are still young (29) and had our first DC when we were 21. While we were on holiday he said “do you wonder what our life would be like if we didn’t have children so young” now I can’t remember exactly what he said next it was either that we probably wouldn’t still be together or that we might not still be together. Then when I questioned that he said he was joking

OP posts:
Backtoblack87 · 08/10/2024 07:22

Wow he clearly doesn’t like you much! Bin him NOW!

Sceptical123 · 08/10/2024 07:20

A BIT shitty and unloved??? 😳

ahemfem · 08/10/2024 07:20

noodlewoo · 08/10/2024 07:17

Thank you everyone. You’ve made me feel better knowing it’s not me. For those who have asked, we’ve been together 12 years and have 2 DC

Oh. I was hoping this was a new relationship and you'd find it easy to leave. Is this how you want your 2 DC to behave? Is this what you want them to think love is? You need to leave him to show them it's not acceptable.

Oceanviews · 08/10/2024 07:19

What a nasty man. How would he like it if you made such comments towards him? He wants to destroy your self esteem, make you insecure about yourself and that can take years to recover from. I'd leave asap.

HavingAnOffDAy · 08/10/2024 07:17

OP please make plans to leave this ‘man’.

My ex-H ruined many holidays, my self esteem, and our marriage making similar comments. I wasn’t allowed to be ill/demonstrate pain, and towards the end even emotion of any kind.

He was abusive and so is your partner. Get out. Fast.

BogRollBOGOF · 08/10/2024 07:17

Hopes that "DP" is meaning recent boyfriend and is very straight forward to dump...

He's vile and you're already doubting yourself. Get him out of your life before he crushes your self esteem.

If he's grossed out by periods, he'll be beyond hopless with pregnancy, birth and fatherhood so there's no happy future in that department with him involved.

Bugger- cross posted.
I hope it's not too difficult to unentangle your lives.

noodlewoo · 08/10/2024 07:17

Thank you everyone. You’ve made me feel better knowing it’s not me. For those who have asked, we’ve been together 12 years and have 2 DC

OP posts:
Summerhillsquare · 08/10/2024 07:16

I bet you are gorgeous. Big hug OP. Some people get off on putting others down, because they are so inadequate themselves.

Trebolle · 08/10/2024 07:16

Good news is he's not your husband.

Dump him immediately.

Moonshiners · 08/10/2024 07:14

Please get rid of this vile bastard.

AimieDaisy · 08/10/2024 07:14

What a horrible man. I’m sorry he made you feel crap on your holiday

Cardinalita90 · 08/10/2024 07:14

He clearly thinks he's better than you and tbh OP, almost like he has contempt for you. These digs will continue like a tap dripping until your self esteem is gone. Bin him off.

eatyeateat · 08/10/2024 07:14

He thinks your period is disgusting? Surely you know that's not ok? Do you ever want children- because if so get rid of this looser right now, things get a whole lot more 'hanging' than a period

Twiglets1 · 08/10/2024 07:13

My husband would never speak to me like that!

How can he still think menstruation is disgusting, is he 12??

He lacks respect for you and very likely all women. Is one of you punching? Yes, and it’s him. He doesn’t deserve a nice partner.

frockandcrocs · 08/10/2024 07:13

Why are you with him?

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 08/10/2024 07:12

Well, put it like this, do you ever say stuff like that to him? I'm going to assume that you don't. That's because you're a decent person. He isn't. He's chipping away at your confidence and it will never be any different. He's a horrible human.

Lentilweaver · 08/10/2024 07:08

In over 25 years of marriage DH has never commented on what I wear or should wear. Unless asked for feedback. Or compared me to others.
He's bloody awful.

MrsWinkly · 08/10/2024 07:08

Yeah, don't waste any more time or energy on this tosser.
Can't imagine DH saying those things to me. Your (D)P sounds like he's got tickets on himself.
You don't have to put up with him, that's not how relationships work.
Remember how shit he's made you feel this holiday then take it from there, and eject the rude lump.

Waitingfordoggo · 08/10/2024 07:08

Sounds like a total cunt. How long have you been putting up with this nonsense? (I’m assuming he hasn’t just suddenly started being rude and unkind out of the blue).