To be scared to have another baby after DH poor show last time.

Please leave. He doesn’t deserve you or the child he has, let alone another one.

This is a no brainer for me. Leave him.

I voted YABU to be still with this horrible man and even consider having another child with him. He sounds vile.

My DH does a lot more night wakings than me... Men and women both need equal sleep. A woman who's gone through a traumatic medical procedure obviously needs more sleep.

OP I absolutely wouldn't have another baby with this man. Please leave him

Urgghhh reminds me of my STBXH. Purposely drove home from the hospital like a maniac after my c section even though I was in agony and begged him to slow down and stop taking corners on two wheels. One of the many reasons he's now an ex.

He got way worse after the second one.

He wants a boy.

you deserve to not even have to ask this question. Xx

He sounds absolutely awful. This is not normal behaviour from a caring partner at all. I’m so sorry you’ve been through this.

What are you even thinking about another baby?, you need to be thinking about leaving. You don't love him and honestly he sounds vile. He will most definitely act the exact same way the second time around

He sounds incredibly selfish, I wouldn't have another baby with a man like that

Why on earth are you with this person?

Oh OP I don't know how you can even look at him, let alone sleep with him.

What a truly cruel appallingly selfish man.

This was distressing to read so goodness knows how awful it was to experience.

Best wishes to you for your future without him.

I wouldn’t spend another day with him, let alone have another baby with him. I’d just leave if you have a large supportive family. Sort out shared finances later on. What a horrible man, and i’ve seen lots of examples of horrible men on here, but he’s right up there

Oh my gosh!! That is some of the worst I’ve read on here in quite some time. You deserve so much better than this!!

and no, men are just as able to deal with sleep deprivation. They actually need (a little!) less sleep than women.

my fiancé stayed up all night in an uncomfortable hospital chair whilst we were waiting to find out whether I had a herniated disc or not… if he can do that (when we had just moved in together), your H can stay up to help care for your shared child!

Leave him. He is abusive.

I've heard the 'men need sleep' before - my first fil literally believed and told me it was natural for women not to sleep but not men! I always wonder why then, until quite recent times, it was only men on the frontlines of battles/war and even emergency services- I'd not realised war had a stop for sleep clause. It's the most ridiculous idea.
However, that musing is really irrelevant here - I'm appalled for you and your child you ended up with such an awful husband/father. It's not even the 'sleep' clause it's the terrible things he said to you, the beyond zero support - seems he's ok, or even likes, seeing you suffer.
I wouldn't debate having a child with him though as he's never going to 'understand' and will make you feel worse about it all over again. Just make sure it can't happen and hopefully make plans to leave. I can't imagine the rest of your life with him, outside the horror of the birth, is moonlight and roses, or even nearly ok. You deserve much, much more, as does your child.
Thoughts to you both xx

I think you know that you shouldn't have another baby with this man. I don't know how you could bring yourself to sleep with him again anyway but also if you were poorly again this time he'd be leaving you to look after a baby and another little one on your own.

I'd personally tell him that it brings out the worst in him, reminding him what he said about you killing yourself, and you're not willing to go through it again because of his actions.

Interestingly my dh trots out the same line about men needing more sleep than women - he does do his share but he's a nightmare when he's tired - yet I read a study the other day that suggested the exact opposite. Actually it's women who need more sleep, we just don't fucking get it.

I voted YABU because I cannot understand why you are still with this man at all, let alone thinking about having another baby with him!!! I’m so sorry you had to suffer that but you can make sure it never happens again by leaving that waste of space.

Two things.

There is absolutely no way you should stay with this man.

Who the hell are the 2% saying you are being unreasonable, and why?!

I think you have your answer on here loud and clear! And I echo the responses. He is the psychopath! I wish you all the best for the future. Take care

It isn't fair on yourself or your child (or weirdly, the husband) to stay in such an unhappy relationship.

I agree with this.

You have been treated appallingly by this man so I'm reluctant to say anything that will make you feel worse, but knowingly having more babies with him now you know what he's really like would be a neglectful and abusive act IMO.

You and your existing child need to get away. I'm aghast that the physical act of conceiving was even on the cards, to be honest!

So why would you even THINK of having another child with him after that?. Are you a masochist?

Oh OP that sounds absolutely awful, I’m so sorry. Echo all the LTB comments. Are you legally married? Time to lawyer up or he’ll take half your house. Good luck.

Hmmm...dunno...always two asides to the story ofc....

And don't forget he's gotta put up with all the shit at work etc - there's no escape for him.

Maybe Even Stevens?

Dunno...not sure...there's loads of shit to put up with all round...the trick is to battle alongside each other, I think...

I always love pop songs where its you and me against the world..."I think were alone now," Tiffany, "Fallin'" - Haim, "Main dans la Main" - Elli and Jacno, "They don't know" - Kirsty McColl

And a good song from years ago: "Cunts Can Fuck Off.."

I like songs x

He sounds absolutely terrible. I can see you are thinking of leaving anyway and you are already tied to him with one child. In your position you could consider getting pregnant again before you leave, having 2 children won’t make you any more tied to him and means children are full siblings rather than you finding a new partner and half siblings. I only suggest this if you really want a second child and have the means raise them without him.