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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to be so irritated by this boy

86 replies

Thirdusername · 07/10/2024 20:40

I can't work out if this boy is rude or if I'm tired.

I have 2 dc - age 2 and 5. I'm a single parent who works full time but with one afternoon off a week which I spend looking after a neighbour's son. My neighbour looks after my eldest dc in return once a week.

The boy asks for things a lot of the time which i find quite demanding but not sure if im being unfair.

For eg:

Him: What's for dinner?
Me: chicken and rice (I know he likes this / eats this)
Him: can I have something else instead?
Me: you can have some bread/ fruit but that's what we've got for dinner
Him: thats a shame. Can't you make fish fingers instead please?
Me: no not tonight, maybe next time
Him: can I have the spiderman plate pls?
Me: yes
Him: can I have that paw patrol cup please
Him: actually can I have that plate instead
Me: yep
Him: can you put on some music?
Me: yep (puts music on)
Him: Is there any more food?
Me: yep extra rice but no more chicken
Him: I wish I could have extra chicken. Do you think your dc will eat all theirs? I wish I had theirs
Me: there's lots of other food you can have
Him: no, I only want chicken. What's for dessert?
Me: yoghurt
Him: can we have those biscuits instead / can I go in the garden / can you get that toy down from the shelf / can I do painting/ can I have an ice cream / can I borrow some clothes and get changed / can you fold 10 bits of paper up / can you get some scissors

Etc etc.

I've usually got a lot of tolerance for kids. So I don't know why this gets to me so much! He sometimes says please and thank you, sometimes not.

Ps should add I hope he has no idea / think I do a good job of hiding it

Yabu: he's a kid and you're being unfair on him

Yanbu: he Sounds a bit entitled/ demanding

OP posts:
Nadja0fAntipaxos · 07/10/2024 20:52

That would both drive me up the wall, and impress me at his confidence. None of it is rude, if a bit lacking in please-and-thank-you. It’s great if kids have the confidence to talk to other adults and express their needs (or annoying whims).

I am also annoyed by the ones who go completely silent and wide-eyed in panic when you ask if they want ketchup or do they like peas.

HorsePeopleAreStablePeople · 07/10/2024 20:51

mikado1 · 07/10/2024 20:49

I feel a bit sorry for him and his mum that you've posted about him. He hasn't done anything wrong and is clearly very polite.

What an odd thing to say

SpiritAdder · 07/10/2024 20:51

It is good that he is comfortable around you. I disagree that he is “too comfortable” or sees you as a substitute mother. I baby sat for years and this is how 6 yr olds are. Nonstop questions. He actually sounds really adorable as he is asking questions politely.

mikado1 · 07/10/2024 20:49

I feel a bit sorry for him and his mum that you've posted about him. He hasn't done anything wrong and is clearly very polite.

BarbaraHoward · 07/10/2024 20:48

Well that sure sounds like a six year old. Grin I'd say he feels comfortable in your house and so is badgering you as if you're a parent rather than being on his best behaviour. I certainly wouldn't mind you reminding mine to use their pleases and thank yous and ask nicely etc, so unless the parents would be weird I think it's fine to correct him as you would your own.

EmeraldRoses · 07/10/2024 20:47

That would drive me up the wall, he sounds really annoying

Original poster
Thirdusername · 07/10/2024 20:47

Sorry he's 6

OP posts:
hoarahloux · 07/10/2024 20:46

Nothing wrong with suggesting a please here and there. "What's the magic word?"

Or "Your food is already on the spiderman plate."

He does sound a little too comfortable in your home, enforce some boundaries and stick to them if you don't want him doing crafts, playing in your garden, etc. "No we're not having paints out.. I can't fold paper for you."

Lavender14 · 07/10/2024 20:43

How old is he?

I would also find that irritating but I'd also assume that he's either testing boundaries as he is somewhere different to home or he's pandered to more at home. Neither of which are his fault as such. Just have a strategy on hand for that afternoon with what to do to keep them all occupied!

alwaysmovingforwards · 07/10/2024 20:43

Just be polite and consistent, firm but fair.

Aibusadandhormonal · 07/10/2024 20:42

How old is he?

He sounds like he sees you as a second mum? He sounds very comfortable in your home. And he does say please and thank you right so I don't think he sounds "rude" just a bit straight forward and honest.