Period pain proof required for school sick days

But they might not have been diagnosed with endometriosis or other issues at that point?
Endometriosis pain is a legitimate reason to take time off work, I cannot work with it on very bad days
Just because age 14 it might be "period pain" doesn't mean it's not actually endometriosis pain

I’m 46 - old school I guess? I’ve had endometriosis since too young an age to too old an age.

A lot of pain which is highly disruptive to my well-being.

I also suffer from a highly debilitating illness .

I don’t think period pain / colds are legitimate reasons to have time off school. As they wouldn’t be reasons to have time off work.

Cont

And pastoral support (year team, safeguarding, Sen team) left in the last academic year. It is estimated at closer to 100 staff across the establishment. A combination of leaving for greener pastures and being got rid of due to performance.

Their Sen department was run into the ground and is being built back up from rubble by a dedicated group of staff, with very little funding to do anything substantially effective.

This will be a reaction to a number of new policies being put in place (girls are also only allowed to wear trousers, talk about victim blaming).

If you want to know what sort of head runs the school, you can do worse than check out chrissietutoruk on twitter. A very talented teacher who worked wonders with her classes, who had an amazing rapport with her lower set and Sen students. She was subjected to some very unprofessional behaviour by the head and trust leaders.

This would not have happened under the previous head, Jason wing. A former Olympian. The students knew where they stood with him. With this head, the rules change so often they don't know which ones they should be following. There is no consistency.

And yes, there are also a large number of entitled parents of entitled children. The majority who work within expectations are being caught in the crossfire here.

In short, NWA was once a great school. But an indecisive slt and lack of appropriate funding are driving it into the ground. With few options for the majority to go elsewhere.

Omg no surprise the head is a male !! My periods were dreadful during my teen years ( and beyond ) I used to suffer passing big clots gushes and pain . The humiliation at school of suddenly bleeding right through pads and school uniforms was intense . I thought the world had become more understanding

I would agree except that I’ve seen similar letters from other schools. Parents being fined for kids being off sick etc
There are now Facebook groups organised to start fighting back because people have had enough. Some schools are sending out automatic letters warning parents about fines. And of course at this time of year missing just a couple of days massively alters the percentage. Some common sense is needed.
I’ve seen people sending in photos of sick etc in to prove their child is ill!

I am the parent of my children and I will decide when they are too ill for school be it with illness or period pain. The school can do one. As long as my kids are doing ok academically and have overall good attendance then that’s what counts. School is there to teach not dictate when my child is well enough for school or what they can have in their packed lunch or drinks bottle. My child my choice how to parent them - and for the record I absolutely do believe that sometimes just like adults our kids get sad, exhausted, fed up and need a bit of tlc and a duvet day.

Huh. I wish my mum would've taken me seriously when I had period pain - she never had a painful or heavy period in her life, and she simply did not believe how much pain I was in during the worst times. I remember just silently crying in maths class once, the teacher came over and asked me what was wrong - I can't remember what I said but I basically almost fainted in the corridor and had to be taken to the nurse's office to lie down. Wasn't allowed any painkillers of course. Mum came and got me and was livid.

No point to this story except I do understand the whole 'power on through' kind of attitude, but for some it's really really difficult and like I say on all the threads like this - this isn't targeting the kids of people that are commenting here. It's commenting those parents that don't take school attendance seriously and let their kid off for any reason, mainly because it's easier for them.

(I do think there is a degree of wilful naivete here as well - I'm sure while your daughter would never, some might let's say, over egg the pain they're feeling to get a day off snuggled in bed.)

I know this school very well. The head is the husband of another headteacher whose school is doing much, much better in the same trust. I am sure there will be a competitive element between them. The head talks a very good talk. But isn't able to put much needed money where his mouth is. Over 60 members of staff, mostly teaching and

But this is going against the government guidance on attendance. It literally says schools shouldn’t ask for medical evidence for stuff like this.

Good for you.
You do realise there are different levels and seriousness of colds and period pains?
Or is this just about you?

I remember a day in the sick bay at school because I had crippling period pain. That was about 45 years ago.

What alarms me about this is what sort of "proof" these fuckers want. Period trackers? Sworn testimony? It's all too reminiscent of the extreme control of women some US politicians advocate for.

My eldest has seasonal asthma which is really exacerbated when he has a cold. If we don’t take a couple of days to nip in the bud with plenty of rest then he will be ill for weeks.

last year he had chicken pox, scarlet fever and severe asthma complications in the space of September-January and they sent us a letter about his attendance despite the fact we had proved he was unwell (appointment/hospital letters, GP notes etc)

I was furious and genuinely don’t think he would have been so ill if we hadn’t pushed him to go to school when he wasn’t quite right.

Period pain is a persistant problem if you're affected by debilitating pains. On average it can easily be monthly.

I was lucky. Mine were erratic and I was afflicted only every 6-12 weeks.

It only takes one block of significant illness to become a persistant absentee.

Many schools don't take the length of the school year so far into.account either, so absence in the autumn term very quickly sledgehammers attendance data and it won't pick up until the summer term.

I’m an ex teacher and used to get really annoyed being surrounded by snotty kids who were too ill to be in school. It’s ridiculous! Yes there are those who take the piss but the majority don’t. I had horrific period pains from the age of 12 and would regularly pass out at school. I remember realising something was wrong when we were told in a biology class that the amount of blood lost was equivalent to a tablespoon or something! I wasn’t diagnosed with endometriosis until I’d been suffering for 15 years. My DDs suffered as well and I would never have forced them to go to school. This drive for 100% attendance is unrealistic!

Exactly!
And it's being blamed on headteacher being a man. Any policy of that sort is likely to have gone through the governing board (which is likely to be more women than men, most are) before being approved due to knowing there will be pushback and complaints from the parents coming their way.
This isn't about the child with excellent behaviour and generally good attendance having a day off per month with bad period pain, it will be about the persistent offenders using periods/colds as an excuse for termtime holidays etc.

Your comment makes me furious.

I have passed out from period pain and ended up in hospital from over-dosing on pain meds and a hole in my leg from a hot water bottle (the result of passing out from too much codeine and paracetamol) which burned a hole in the bottom of my leg when I passed out, and then it needed packing.

Do you think we are lying? Do you think if someone is in so much pain that they can't function properly that they will actually learn anything despite attending?

I got sent home from school on multiple occasions when my attempts at powering on through period pain were floundering. This was both as a pupil and a teacher.

I had prescriptions, but as my periods were erratic they didn't help with day 1 because they weren't in my system in anticipation. In one holiday job at 18, I ended up totally incapacitated in the fetal position on a filthy stockroom floor waiting to be found because I couldn't move through the pain. My cramps would radiate through my quads up into my abdomen.

In comparison, while waiting to get to 3cm dilated in labour, I went out for a bar meal. Labour had been confirmed the previous night and at least I only had to shut my eyes and breathe through the contractions every 5 minutes at that point. At least by the pushing stage 24 hours later I got gas and air and wasn't expected to crack on as normal.

5-6cm dilated in a back to back labour hurt less than my teenage period pains!

Attendance policies are fucking ridiculous in schools. DS was marked unauthorised last year for vomiting. He'd used up the goodwill allowance on authorised illness with a chronic condition (that resulted in a 999 call from school) and surgery.

The quote is this:

guidance states that in the "majority of cases" a parent informing the school their child is ill "can be accepted without question or concern".

It added: "Only where the school has genuine and reasonable doubt about the authenticity of the illness should medical evidence be requested to support the absence."

But you put period pain in the thread title and it’s as good clickbait as the BBC.

My dd vomits and faints with period pain, can’t eat anything. It just lasts a day. She has a very high pain threshold which has been commented on so she is in no way not resilient. She has spent many weeks in hospital for a condition that is very gruelling.

There is no way I’ll be bothering our GP (even if I could get an appointment) and in no way is she going in to school when she can barely move.

Periods vary hugely as does the menopause. They’ve recently said menopause needs to be better understood in the workplace but now periods don’t in school. 🤔

Can we have a serious conversation vs what’s been reported as a headline (click bait) on the BBC.

That schools is struggling with attendance numbers. Teachers are not minded/stupid enough to be requesting medical evidence they know is almost impossible to get for children who are otherwise engaged at school and doing well.

It will be persistent offenders.

Makes me think it's worse than those cultures where you have to go to a special hut when bleeding. I thought that was bad but it's better than being forced to participate when you're feeling appalling. When will any culture learn to respect women and the amazing things their bodies do

As an example today I've taken
Max dose of naproxen
Max dose of paracetamol
240mg dihydrocodeine
Max dose of Buscopan
Herbal pain patch
Heat pad

Virtually no relief. My stomach looks like a balloon and I'm not even on!

It's part of the wider problem though that time off sick, whether school or work, is often not seen as acceptable anymore. Looking back, I remember being proud of myself for pushing myself to work when I was really quite ill - only to find my company much less impressed when I passed my lurgy to a number of colleagues who were sensible enough to take time off. I ended up getting a bollocking but still didn't quite get it. Later on I ignored a hacking cough for ages under the guise of 'powering through'. It turned out to be pneumonia. Similarly I ignored for too long a headache that turned out to be meningitis. It was all part of a culture of 'manning up' and getting the job done no matter what. Of boasting of never missing a day.

It's caused me more trouble then benefit and I won't be insisting on the same for my daughters. Sometimes you just need to rest and recover and I actually find you get back to work sooner and are more productive for it than pushing on, unable to do the job properly and making mistakes because you're not at your best, and then having to take more time off when you've made yourself sicker than you would have been had you dealt with it straightaway. It's ridiculous.

I get that there are malingerers and people who will take advantage and I don't know how we get around that. A girl at my school was off long term sick but was spotted on TV at that big Smash Hits event thing that used to happen every year, so clearly well enough to have gone to school that day. Period pains shouldn't be used as a get out of school free card but nor should we putting people, particularly children, under this sort of pressure.

I feel like we need a mumsnet campaign on this. It's ridiculous and it's discriminatory.

fwiw I do not have endometriosis or PCOS and my periods since I had children have been fine BUT as a teenager day 1 of my period would always involve vomiting, fainting, diarrhoea, and being unable to move from a fetal position. Day 2 would be painful but I could power through and day 3 onwards was ok. I cannot imagine how much women with medical conditions like endometriosis must be suffering. No one has the right to tell them to power through.

Thing is, if it's endo it's not always just on your period
I'm 40 and only just diagnosed and I have stage 4, adenomyosis, kissing ovaries, a 9cm endometrioma... still waiting for surgery

Tonight I've taken every single painkiller I can up to the max dose and nothing is touching it, it feels like my ovary is being twisted and yanked. I'm ringing the GP tomorrow to ask about morphine and I'm more capable of coping with pain than a child

And likely to punch the next person who says oh take some paracetamol