Period pain proof required for school sick days

Depends on where you work.
I'm so sorry you are obviously in workplaces that dont value you enough to treat you as adults.

I work in a place that actively discourages me to go in with a stinking cold, because I work with really Ill children, them catching my cold could hasten their demise. So as I dont like the idea of killing off children, I take time off for colds and I get paid too.
Also the staff then dont catch my lousy cold and it doesnt do the rounds.
That is what a decent workplace should look like, and a school for that matter.

My DD just had a day off the other day for severe period pain, we get this on the first day or so every other month, She is year 11 and she will refuse to go if thats bad as can vomit.
School are not sympethic to this so I dont tell them the real reason. Once they rang me to say she she had been sick and can I pick her up. I mistakenly said about DD's periods and the receptionist's tone changed and said "Oh i see. We dont normally let them go home for period pain".

We have been to the GP but they refused to give any kind of test and just suggested pain killers which dont help that much.

Of course she's going to miss some days of school, in that situation. Restricting toilet access is a vicious circle.

Toilet use is one of the things I’ve been asking about at secondary school tours. So far there seems to be a definite trend where the state schools seem much more draconian than the private schools. It does feel really dehumanising to have to get a special pass to use a loo or to just have no option at break,

I still remember being absolutely mortified that I flooded at work when I was younger and as I got up to leave I saw blood on the chair. I was in a meeting I felt I couldn’t leave and I just felt so humiliated. Now I’m older I would have stepped out much earlier but you tend to have a lack of confidence when younger. I’d hate for my girls to not be able to use the toilet at school and it is one of the things I’m thinking about re school choices but it is ridiculous that I’m even thinking about it.

My dd is almost 16 since starting her periods she has one pretty much every other month which is incredibly heavy. As soon as she stands she floods thru a heavy tampon and pad which then makes her feel lightheaded/sick. They aren’t allowed to use the toilet as needed (teachers discretion and most say no) without a toilet pass. After a few months of toilet passes they refused anymore and said she would need a drs note before issuing anymore toilet passes as clearly there was an issue. We had already been to the drs who were no help and just said they would likely balance out over time. It’s not nice when your periods are so heavy you flood that much so yes she’s missed some days of school - she has to get public transport to and from school and no one wants to be worrying about standing up on a train and leaving a huge patch of blood on the seat/on your uniform. The whole thing around periods in secondary schools feels outdated imagine having to ask your boss to use the toilet in the office and being told no!

100% this- no way should children be forced to wear tampons or take painkillers just to go swimming!

Yes, one wonders what the local GP practices think of all this nonsense.

Want to recommend tranexamic acid to all Mum’s of teens suffering like this. It has made so much difference to my DD. She can go to school now through her periods whereas was vomiting and pale and in massive pain before.

I also don’t understand why it’s a 5 day rule for the fines when, in the real world, you have to self-certificate for 7 days. I’m pretty sure doctors won’t provide “medical evidence” for absences less than 7 days?

How have you possibly made this about race? My point is (and I posted the actual guidance) this is click bait as has been evidenced very well by this thread.

I don’t know any schools that send attendance letters every month. We get them termly. My DC had a day off v early in the term and is already at 95.6% attendance. Even with another day or two, average by end of autumn term will still be at the magic number of 96%.

Similar, as a teen I had horrendous pain on first day or two. I ended up in the school office with a hot water bottle and pain killers because I couldn't make it home by myself in that state. Every single time.

Been awful but bearable as an adult and now I'm menopausal so dont have any. And the relief that I no longer have to suffer or take far too many tablets is immense.
No pcos no endo but a painful period is a painful period, why the hell are girls being treated like this. Almost forced to use pain relief and sanitary ware that even adults wont use, just to prop up a failing school. I am furious that yet again the girls get to be the bloody scapegoat. And then refused access to the very needed single sex toilet, oh wait.

How would that be applied for girls in the first months of secondary? There would be no record to rely on. There would be no prior experience to use to make decisions.

Do you pick on girls of a certain race or post code? Girls who come from certain primary schools?

Does some new head teacher keen to make a big impression decide to make an example of the first ten girls who take a day or two off every month?

This, with bells on.

It's school, not the bloody army.

I'm not sure why or when we seemed to make a collective decision that anyone who carries on working/going to school when they're unwell is somehow morally superior.

Why on earth do people compete for bragging rights about how little time they've had off? Or how they "managed to power through" <insert your choice of debilitating illnesses/surgery etc>.

There's no medal for pushing yourself through misery when you'd be much better taking a day off sick and recovering.

The UK - and certain other countries - has a terrible attitude to self-care, and completely lacks balance in its approach to well-being and health.

Having children fixed my heavy periods, but I had a nightmare when I was younger. Occasionally my DD has a horrible period that leaves her doubled over in pain - but the majority are absolutely fine and she doesn't even need pain relief. If she was having one of her bad periods, then there's not a single chance in this world that I'd force her to power through it and endure a day of misery just to fulfil a headteacher's desired attendance quota. And I was a school governor for over five years, so it's not as if I don't appreciate the importance of good attendance....

I know there's a back story but really, this is happening in multiple schools and I don't care what the excuse is - it's not OK. We should be teaching our children to prioritise their wellbeing and to take time out if they are genuinely unwell. There's no shame in giving your body time to heal and recover.

If you think the average doctor would be any help with severe period pain, you are mistaken. The vast majority of the time, women and girls presenting with severe menstrual related symptoms are dismissed as cry babies.

It takes years for the average woman with endometriosis to be diagnosed, usually after being told she should take exercise, take aspirin, get psychotherapy, and many other non-solutions.

And why shouldn't girls be allowed to skip PE or swimming if they are experiencing period related discomfort of any kind, or pain?
Tampons are not for everyone. Medication can have unpleasant side effects. If you think parents should make their daughters straighten up and fly right, maybe ask yourself why it's desirable to make girls ignore physical symptoms or not listen to their bodies.

See people who say ‘on really I never gave any pain!’ I want to slap them. I remember writhing in my bed begging my mum to put a knife through me and praying to God to stop the pain despite not believing in any religion. I was lucky that my mum had suffered worse than me so she listened and believed me. Even now at 45 I can feel like I’m being snapped in two. That’s why I liked wfh as I didn’t have to put on my game face, problem is my cycle had always been erratic so working hybrid means I still have to go in as I can’t always predict it. If anyone says they have period pain I instantly feel for them.

I hear you. There have been times where I have honestly wanted to be dead as the pain was so intense. I've been on all fours on the floor, screaming at the top of my lungs until I passed out.

I'm utterly outraged that we are not taken seriously by medical professionals, and other folk who don't appear to believe us because they haven't experienced it themselves.

That was me. My mother, who was neglectful of my health at best, sent me to school regardless and I would be sent out of class every single month over two days. I couldn’t stand up when the pains were at their worst.

I was taken to the doctor and was dismissed with painkillers that did bugger all as I would throw up from pain so half dissolved pain killers would come up. The Dr said having a baby would help..I was 14, I wanted to die every month and told my mum I was going to throw myself under a train and was serious about it. I had it planned as we lived near a high speed line. That was when the GP very reluctantly prescribed the pill.

So it’s hard to get medical evidence.

I used to faint from period pain when I was a teenager. My friend actually knocked herself unconscious as she fainted in the bathroom and hit her head on the sink. Can you not grasp that some women are more badly affected than others!

Why can’t we normalise not doing pe when uncomfortable? Particularly for girls getting the hang of managing periods.

as an adult who is a keen gym member, I skip the gym the first 3 days of my period so I don’t go dizzy or flood while in light clothing. Can’t we offer teenage girls the same dignity?

And I keep DS off when he’s having mild asthma trouble on pe days because they won’t accept a note for pe and he gets so much worse after it. Note not indefinitely: just on the tail end of a cold or similar that makes it flare up.

I was lucky enough to have a GP who listened to me and took action. I kept a diary of symptoms for 3 months then printed it out and showed him.

He was aghast.
Referred me straight away.

Funnily enough, I managed to conceive just before one of my appointments.
Had DS1 by em c/s and never had so much as a twinge of pain since!

(and I used to cry silently into my cupboard at work as I was in so much pain)

WTF, how not legitimate? Take a girl who's filling a super tampon and a night-time pad in 20 minutes, who can barely hear what the teacher is saying because she's having to put so much effort into just sitting straight and not vomiting or passing out from pain. She's told she can't use the toilet during lesson time and bleeds through her clothes. At what point in this nightmare (I describe my own experience) is there any benefit to anyone in her being at school? Get a fucking grip. And I'm older than you. Age has nothing to do with it.

I had period pain that bad as a teenager. I did seek medical attention but there wasn’t much they could do for me. It got better when I was ready to go on the pill, which at 13 I was not. I was also a competitive swimmer and it took me blooming ages to get the hang of tampons. I wanted to use them but could not get them up my vag properly!! I’m sure some families take the piss but if a 13 year doesn’t want to insert something in her vagina, she jolly well should t have to do PE!!

I took many a day off work in my twenties because of period pain. Has it occurred to you that debilitating pain from periods is common?