To ask if you have a successful MIL/DIL relationship…how did you do?

I think my MIL has played her role very carefully and tactfully. She is a very family orientated, conservative, organised, middle class woman. We are not very similar but we are both family orientated and this seems to help us get along and prioritise family connection above all else.

Her main key to success is that she never judges or offers her opinion on my parenting. I know that she likely doesn't agree with baby-led weaning or co-sleeping for instance because she didn't approach parenting that way. She doesn't say a word. We focus on what we have in common.

In return for her tactful approach, I work to ensure that they regularly see their GC. I know this means a lot to my MIL. I want my DC to have a strong connection with their GPs. We all win.

I had a great relationship with mine but she didn't interfere at all. She was always really friendly and easy to talk to but didn't pry. She treated her son as an adult. They always had a relaxed relationship and laughed a lot so ours was an extension of that.

I have a reasonable relationship with mine and now 18 years later love her dearly. Initially at the start I had strict and clear firm boundaries between her home and mine. This was because initially she tended to get overly involved in our lives. Things have warmed up a lot as we are both careful to limit any opportunity for undue interference that may lead to misunderstandings. She also respects my relationship with DH and I also respect her relationship with her son.

I have a DIL. She is my daughter’s wife so maybe that makes a difference? I don’t know. I just treat her like I do my daughter, we’re good friends, we have a laugh together, I never ever interfere with anything they’re doing and we get along really well.

However, she is a lovely person, easy to be with, good fun. It would be so much harder if my daughter had married a difficult woman.

My DD was married to a man before she “came out” ; their divorce was very amicable and we are still all friends and spend a lot of time together, I even worked for him for a while when he was running a bar.

Basically I think a lot of it is down to luck, your offspring marrying someone easy to get along with. I’m very lucky my daughter made good choices!