So for context. I was brought up Catholic - Irish catholic to be exact.
I was Christened, had my First Holy Communion and confirmation. Went to a Catholic primary school, church every Sunday etc. I believed in God because I was told to believe in God.
When I was 15, my younger sister 13 was diagnosed with a malignant brain cancer and had to have several invasive surgeries and several years of treatment. She then ended up with a benign growth on her brain 12 years later and again has several invasive surgeries and years of recuperation - she is now 36 and still not "fully" recovered. She cant work and leads a very solitary life with her (abusive in some ways, not physically) partner of 20 years.
I was told that this was gods way of testing her and testing us as a family. My young brain couldn't comprehend this - I mean - why would God, the GOOD entity in all this, want to TEST a child? Test our family? (we where good church goers, my family fostered, we were pillars of the community!)
I had led a sheltered life until I was 17, grew up with strict rules, around fairy tails and encouraged to grow up, get married, have children.
I got married at 18, but why did God direct me to an abusive alcoholic?
I had a baby at 21 and was divorced at 22.
I now have a son whom (I love with all my heart! dont get me wrong!) behaves appallingly (my other child doesn't?) smashes doors, pees in bottles, breaks everything, doesn't wash, lives in filth, has no respect for me or our home, was a nightmare through Nursery, Primary school, Secondary school and College and at 17, wont go to college because "I hate maths". (yes he has SEND - but do you THINK HE WILL GO TO SEE A DOCTOR? No?!
Why would God send me such a difficult person to parent? why me?
Anyway - I digress.
I haven't been to Church (unless it was a funeral) since I was15. I'm 38 now, I don't believe in God and don't believe there is any evidence that Religion is anything but man made. I mean, I am a good person. I don't drink, smoke, take drugs..... I stay on the right side of the law, I'm kind, thoughtful, loving.... why why have I had so many bad/very difficult things happen to me in my life?
I recently saw an old friend, who at Secondary school was considered "promiscuous", but has been married for 15 years and is now a Mormon (has been since she married). The meeting was completely accidental, and she constantly used phrases like "God was good to us" or "God provided...." etc..... kinds felt like she was rubbing it in, despite how she acted at school!
She then went on to ask about my family and children and was shocked that I had not indoctrinated them into the Catholic Religion.... she was then further upset when I explained that I had my reasons for not believing, that I believed religion was man made.
She got really upset and the interaction ended quite badly.... with her insinuating that I was calling her faith lies (I didn't!) and me furious for being called a bad person because I didn't have a faith.
I fully accept that people have religion - You do you? But surely you should be open to the idea that people don't have faith?
What's your opinion? Was I being unreasonable by saying that no GOOD GOD would put tests on a child (my sister) by giving them cancer?... therefore God cannot exist?