Page 2 | Would you send reception child to school today ? Illness related

savetheday · 2024-10-07T06:03:41+00:00

My threshold for illness and sending my child to nursery has always been very low. So any slight issue, I tend to keep her home. She's started school now and her brother has had a fever for a few days. She woke up today and I took her temperature at 38. I told her she may not be able to go to school today and she was distraught because she's going to miss her friends, bless her. Anyway, she's downstairs now and the temp seems to have come down on its own at around 37.4, some times 37.7. In my opinion, she should not go in today. What would you do ? As I said, my usual threshold is low but I understand that now she's at school - she'll sometimes need to go in even with a sore throat or something but I draw the line at waking up with a fever ? To me that means she's not well and coming down with something. She says she doesn't have pain anywhere.

longapple · 08/10/2024 10:37

savetheday · 08/10/2024 10:29

@TenWeeCaramelJoeys I clearly need to change my tune though don't I ?

That's why I asked because I know I'm cautious, but I need to change my ways as she is at school now. I'm sorry if that sounds like I don't give a toss about other kids. Unfortunately it's the schools that are penalising parents too much for absences. I agree with you that she should not have gone yesterday. But what choice do I have, now she's at school and needs to attend ?

I'll only keep her off if she's really unwell in herself. I feel for your child. I am immunocompromised myself. The system isn't right, if you ask me.

You won't get fined for illness. Fines are for unauthorised absence, if you follow the school policy and report sickness correctly it is authorised absence.

I follow the NHS guidance here:
https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/is-my-child-too-ill-for-school/

And if my child was off enough for them to question it (he hasn't been off an unusual amount, but who knows what will go around any particular year) I keep a record and will ask them which illness I should have sent him in with.

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 10:29

@TenWeeCaramelJoeys I clearly need to change my tune though don't I ?

That's why I asked because I know I'm cautious, but I need to change my ways as she is at school now. I'm sorry if that sounds like I don't give a toss about other kids. Unfortunately it's the schools that are penalising parents too much for absences. I agree with you that she should not have gone yesterday. But what choice do I have, now she's at school and needs to attend ?

I'll only keep her off if she's really unwell in herself. I feel for your child. I am immunocompromised myself. The system isn't right, if you ask me.

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TreeCake · 08/10/2024 10:26

I was one who said that she sounded fine and I would send her in.
I stand by it too; in my situation I can take a single day of domestic leave at a time so I keep this for when it's really needed. However with a temp of 40 I would obviously be keeping her at home.

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 08/10/2024 09:55

savetheday · 08/10/2024 09:33

@Sendwineandchocolate I would think so. It's unfortunately a risk we all expose our kids to when we take them to school or anywhere really.

And most of the time, they're fine and it builds their immune system.

But of course, on this thread I can't win, can I !

Well you certainly changed your tune based on a few opinions on the internet. You went from being concerned about your child being unwell and possibly being contagious to others, to not giving a toss. Maybe I’m biased because I have a child who is immunosuppressed. I accept that it’s unrealistic to think we can (or should) protect our children from all illnesses, but a bit of common sense doesn’t go amiss when it comes to a raised temperature.

DappledThings · 08/10/2024 09:52

The vast majority of people who responded early on were the "crack on, you're being paranoid" crew. They're all oddly quiet now though. You're right op, you can't win! Please make sure you make time today to sit and eat something nice and have a coffee while you're looking after the plague house!
I'm happy to come back and stand by it. She might have been brewing something yesterday but she was fine to go in. It wad still the right decision.

longapple · 08/10/2024 09:49

The vast majority of people who responded early on were the "crack on, you're being paranoid" crew. They're all oddly quiet now though. You're right op, you can't win! Please make sure you make time today to sit and eat something nice and have a coffee while you're looking after the plague house!

It was your call and you were happy with your decision. You know your child best and you said she seemed well in herself. For me, the temperature is enough indication that mine needs a day off to rest but I think he only gets a fever when he is properly unwell. All kids are different and those with less well tuned immune systems will get an overreaction to something that they throw off in a morning.

If she has no obvious other symptoms perhaps it could be something like a bladder infection, those are sneaky and take a while to become obvious.

One thing about swimming, I was prone to ear infections as a child and was told by the doctor not to swim with a snotty cold as that could push the infection into my ear. That's the only reason I know of not to swim and is only relevant if you're prone to a certain type of ear infection I think. Or it might just have been 80s advice! I'm sure your mum was just trying to help, smile nicely and say you'll bear that in mind next time! I'm sure the cool water felt lovely if she had a bit of a fever :)

Hope they're both on the mend today x

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 09:33

@Sendwineandchocolate I would think so. It's unfortunately a risk we all expose our kids to when we take them to school or anywhere really.

And most of the time, they're fine and it builds their immune system.

But of course, on this thread I can't win, can I !

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Sendwineandchocolate · 08/10/2024 09:19

savetheday · 08/10/2024 08:58

She definitely had a few readings at 38. It had nothing to do with her being in bed. She wasn't feeling well in the morning, clearly. She said her skin was hot. She only says that when she has a fever. She doesn't even really sleep with covers on anyway, so it just wasn't that she was really wrapped up or anything, like some posters suggested.

She was coming down with it, I stand by that. But she was probably ok to go in. She didn't eat her breakfast but just wanted milk. She was in the beginning stages of the illness yesterday and it kicked off properly yesterday afternoon.

She'll be ok and so will her classmates.

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You know her classmates will all be ok ?

Sendwineandchocolate · 08/10/2024 09:18

Pandasnacks · 08/10/2024 07:32

Obviously not. And I've seen your other post saying someone would come out of the 'woodwork' to say she should go in today. But you were not given bad advice on here yesterday, you were being over cautious, today she is ill. Not sure why you want to nit pick at the reasonable advice you were given. Next time don't ask if you don't want the comments I guess 🤷‍♀️

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No her daughter had a temp yesterday 38 is a temp and is not caused by a duvet.
she had the same virus / illness last night with a fever of 39 etc as she did in the morning at 38

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 08:58

mm81736 · 08/10/2024 08:46

Definitions of a fever vary by organisation, but a temperature of 37.5 or above is considered a liw grade fever.I wouldn’t send a reception child in with a temperature. What are they really going to miss? On the other hand she will be in close proximity to 20+ others including g the teacher

She definitely had a few readings at 38. It had nothing to do with her being in bed. She wasn't feeling well in the morning, clearly. She said her skin was hot. She only says that when she has a fever. She doesn't even really sleep with covers on anyway, so it just wasn't that she was really wrapped up or anything, like some posters suggested.

She was coming down with it, I stand by that. But she was probably ok to go in. She didn't eat her breakfast but just wanted milk. She was in the beginning stages of the illness yesterday and it kicked off properly yesterday afternoon.

She'll be ok and so will her classmates.

OP posts:

mm81736 · 08/10/2024 08:46

Definitions of a fever vary by organisation, but a temperature of 37.5 or above is considered a liw grade fever.I wouldn’t send a reception child in with a temperature. What are they really going to miss? On the other hand she will be in close proximity to 20+ others including g the teacher

Haroldwilson · 08/10/2024 08:27

Come off it, they would have caught it anyway and it's not a bad thing they did - coughs and colds are important in childhood to build up the immune system.

Go with your instincts, but don't keep a child off just for a snotty nose. I also think fever always sounds quite dramatic, like someone lying listless in an eighteenth century bed - temperature is much less hyperbolic unless they really are feverish (I think this means hot/cold, shivery, incoherent etc).

TenWeeCaramelJoeys · 08/10/2024 08:17

However in terms of absences, it's probably best she did go in yesterday and I have saved the time for when she's actually very sick, like today.

Not best for the other children in the class though, some of whom will now have caught what your daughter has. Honestly, I think you should have gone with your instincts yesterday. You sounded sensible rather than paranoid. It was annoying to see how many were saying you should just dose her up and send her in. A fever means the child is fighting something and viruses are generally most contagious at the start. I hope she's feeling better soon.

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 08/10/2024 08:08

You sound like a great mum OP. Hope your children are both feeling better soon.

Blondeshavemorefun · 08/10/2024 08:05

Nurofen I find it better for temp then calpol

But you can give both alternatively

MuggleMe · 08/10/2024 08:04

My standard is to inform the teacher at drop off that DD is feeling under the weather and I'm at home and don't hesitate to call. I've volunteered in reception and seen children snoozing in the book corner because the teacher knows it'll be massively disruptive to call the parent away from work an hour before school finishes.

I would have sent in yesterday as she was keen, ate breakfast (a big marker round here) and especially because she had a school trip. They'll be doing work on it and chatting about it all week.

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 08:02

@NerrSnerr I know what you mean, but I do like to tell her these things sometimes to disprove her theories, as my logical mind knows that she won't get pneumonia just because she didn't have socks on or something.

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Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 08:00

@Dramatic yes you're right. My gut told me she wasn't ok, as soon as she called me yesterday morning.

I think she was ok yesterday during the day having fun with her friends and then crashed when she got home. But I don't know for sure. I'll ask the teachers. Her class only has 15 in it, so you'd think they'd be more likely to notice if she's unwell. I'm assuming she was just having fun and fine most of the day, even if she had a slight fever.

However in terms of absences, it's probably best she did go in yesterday and I have saved the time for when she's actually very sick, like today.

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NerrSnerr · 08/10/2024 07:56

savetheday · 07/10/2024 18:29

@Phonicshaskilledmeoff my mum is OBSESSED with stuff like this causing pneumonia and bad illnesses... I normally take it with a pinch of salt but I am exhausted today from being up since 3 am. She really freaked me out.

' well hopefully she doesn't get something REALLY REALLY bad ' ' I can't believe you let her go swimming ' ... etc etc

If you knew that you shouldn't have told her. Just don't tell her next time.

Dramatic · 08/10/2024 07:53

savetheday · 07/10/2024 17:06

DD has come back from school with 39 fever.

There was definitely something up this morning.

She seems ok in herself but just tried.

You know your child best and in future if this happens I'd keep her off. In my experience if a child feels hot to the touch it usually means they're coming down with something even if their actual temperature hasn't gone up yet. Kids can go downhill quite fast and in a class of 30 they may be overlooked and left feeling awful most of the day. I hope both of them are feeling better soon.

Pandasnacks · 08/10/2024 07:32

savetheday · 08/10/2024 02:14

40 degrees fever now for my DD.

Surely I can't send her to school in the morning..

Obviously not. And I've seen your other post saying someone would come out of the 'woodwork' to say she should go in today. But you were not given bad advice on here yesterday, you were being over cautious, today she is ill. Not sure why you want to nit pick at the reasonable advice you were given. Next time don't ask if you don't want the comments I guess 🤷‍♀️

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 07:29

Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 08/10/2024 06:59

She’s probably fine, just a cold, but no school at 40, and keep a close eye on her. Ring 111 for advice (I’d do now rather than later as will only get busier) but I suspect they will say to ring back if creeps up higher, lasts longer than a couple days or she develops other symptoms. Don’t think gp will bother seeing you yet x

Yeah I'm sure it's just the same thing my son has. She doesn't seem to have any other symptoms though which is a slight concern, but I assume they'll come later. She's watching TV and talking, rather than being really down.

She says her chest hurts though and she seems to be feeling nauseous as she asked for a bucket and said she needs to ' spit '. That's what she calls it:.

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Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 08/10/2024 06:59

She’s probably fine, just a cold, but no school at 40, and keep a close eye on her. Ring 111 for advice (I’d do now rather than later as will only get busier) but I suspect they will say to ring back if creeps up higher, lasts longer than a couple days or she develops other symptoms. Don’t think gp will bother seeing you yet x

Original poster

savetheday · 08/10/2024 06:57

savetheday · 08/10/2024 02:14

40 degrees fever now for my DD.

Surely I can't send her to school in the morning..

I wasn't really asking but I thought that for sure that someone would come out of the woodwork and say that she can go in if she's ' fine ' in the morning.

I am undecided if she should have gone in or not yesterday. She was coming down with something but it hasn't properly arrived yet. Now it has arrived..

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Sendwineandchocolate · 08/10/2024 04:32

savetheday · 08/10/2024 02:14

40 degrees fever now for my DD.

Surely I can't send her to school in the morning..

I’m not sure why you would even need to ask this. Of course now, she shouldn’t have gone this morning either.
home, fluids and calpol if needed.