Please.
I need to be told to get on with it.
I know I can’t cancel.
I am having an endometrial ablation on Thursday.
I’ve been booked for the surgery for ages, I need the endo ablation to give me a chance at normality instead of not leaving the house for the 3 days at the start of my monthlies, my children suffer because of it.
I know my consultant well and he is hopeful for a good result. He knows I have a difficult gynae history. He agreed to perform the ablation under general anaesthetic because of my history. I couldn’t face it under local/sedation and I’ve waited ages for a date. Also, my consultant is leaving the trust shortly so I’m keen to have him not someone I don’t know and haven’t built trust with yet.
But.
I am suddenly terrified. Not an impending doom feeling but a fear.
In the last 4 weeks my father and 2 friends have passed away - none under anaesthetic or due to surgery - but I am suddenly terrified I will die and leave my children.
I know I need the surgery but keep thinking about cancelling.
Please help.