People Cancelling Last Minute!!

Maybe cos it's really hard to find new friends with consistency.
That are local ish . I can only seem to find stuff like I'm doing today in other cities miles away.

I doubt people here would be OK with someone cancelling every time.

Not enjoying eating my lunch on a park bench with pigeons everywhere .

Who knows whether the friend is lying, or whether the OP is lying about the stress this has caused. Does it really matter? My guess is that neither is lying, but they are both seeing things only in terms of how they affect them, and not considering the other party. Whether that is reasonable or unreasonable, they are equally culpable.

The friend was selfish and inconsiderate to cancel so late. IMO he was also in the wrong for agreeing to do something that he knew he might struggle to do.

The OP was wrong to send the texts, which will only have made matters worse, but the friend should at least have replied to the first one or two until it became apparent that there were going to be regular updates about how the day was going in his absence.

Neither has come out of this very well.

Completely understand that but she has acted completely childish imo.

She wants recognition of the stress and anxiety it has caused her but says her friend is lying about being anxious and is just lazy.

Completely unreasonable.

In regards to the friend not replying to texts, I'll often text or email and then not look at the reply because the thought of doing causes so much anxiety, dread and nausea so it might not be that the friend is ignoring her.

If she thinks her friend is lying and is unreliable then just end the friendship.

I think as he lives with his parents he just didn't want to tell them he was out today
As he doesn't go out much so perhaps they would ask who with etc..
Such a lame excuse. Has anxiety sometimes yet goes cinema often or stuff with immediate family.
I don't need to do that with my parents! I live alone and can lie if I want. Or say I went out with company even if it was alone. My life to say whatever.

Maybe she doesn't wanna do stuff on her own hence why did it with friend it can affect her co fidence what he did to. People don't understand that to

@Aquarius1234
Are you going to answer any of the questions about whether you met this guy on a dating app and what sort of relationship this is supposed to be?

I feel like you are studiously ignoring points that people are making.

Christ, you sound awful. You're making our friend is lying about having anxiety yet you're claiming him cancelling has caused your to have anxiety? Maybe you're lying.

And yes, I get someone cancelling last minute causes stress but "going of spite to him" is hilarious. You still had 20 minutes, weren't going to miss your train. You've seen a show (?), did you enjoy it?

Complaining about eating your lunch with pigeons around is a pointless detail because you would have eaten lunch with pigeons around if friend had made it?

Spamming texts is so immature and that really comes across in your posts too. I suggest working on yourself.

Anxiety is horrible and doesn't go "I'm going to appear just before x event" meaning there's no warning and often means cancelling last minute. I have some chronic illnesses and often cancel last minute because when plans are made, I feel up for it and by the time comes I just can't do it. It's awful, I feel guilty but people that actually care understand that's it's not in my control and don't claim I'm lying about it.

You really need to grow up.

Turn this around OP
and see it from your friends point of view.

I was due to see my friend today. I haven’t seen them for 18 months as I struggle with anxiety. Today it all got on top of me and I couldn’t go. I feel terrible but I text my friend to apologise. Since then she has sent me lots of negative and frankly, abusive messages. We won’t be friends anymore but AIBU that she is a nasty peice of work and completely selfish, maybe even unhinged?

MN: YANBU!

So just lazy and blaming anxiety. Yet I know they went to event with a relative last week.
They even said that in message. I know I went to such and such last week. But I don't think I can go out this time!!
I think they just don't wannt meet me!
It's the pretending that bothers me and agreeing to all the plans and asking all the questions.

I always find it odd when it's always one party that moves the goal posts and times / dates when arranging meets.
Any psychologists in the house??
Do more vunerable or desperate people, let people cancel on them multiple times and still forgive eventually??

I think as he lives with his parents he just didn't want to tell them he was out today
As he doesn't go out much so perhaps they would ask who with etc..
Such a lame excuse. Has anxiety sometimes yet goes cinema often or stuff with immediate family.
I don't need to do that with my parents! I live alone and can lie if I want. Or say I went out with company even if it was alone. My life to say whatever.