To be envious of these female Doctors

This is very funny and describes me very well😅 Part of the problem is that, on days when I am not well turned out I find people (staff and patients) don't trust me or take me seriously. I need to look the part given what I'm doing so patients have confidence in me.

I think you should just take a little prescription from them, OP. Go out this weekend and get yourself some wide-legged trousers and new shoes. Have a haircut and a grooming session. Maybe get your car valeted. You'll feel better. There is nothing more remarkable about being a doctor than a teacher.

I've no doubt op that someone will be looking at you thinking they wish they were you! I used to work with a woman who had her babies really young and it was funny because I really wanted a family but hadn't met the right person at the time and I remember her telling me she wished she'd waited and she really envied me because I was starting out well in my career and had money to spend on myself and going out having fun etc, whereas I really envied the beautiful relationship she had with her kids and how rich her life seemed to be with love for them.

I think this maybe says more about your confidence and sense of investment in yourself. Maybe it's time for a new haircut or having some fun with your wardrobe and building up a collection. I'm nearly 40 now and I feel like since having ds that I've fallen into such a routine of wearing the same frumpy clothes, wearing much less makeup and scraping my hair up when really it could do with a wash and ideally a colour! I think it's just a sign that you need to carve out a bit more you time?

I'm a teacher and my sister is a doctor. Not a chance I'd swap places. And we live in similar size houses, drive similar cars etc. I'm sure she's got loads in pensions and whatever but her lifestyle certainly isn't different enough to make me at all envious of her job, which frankly sounds far less pleasant and fun than mine!

I briefly worked as admin in a paediatric department of a hospital and some of the consultants were so beautiful and stylish. I don't doubt the work they did to get there though, so I can't say I'm jealous

So dh is a Dr, not too far off retirement now, he's never been glamorous or well groomed 😂. And our car is leased we don't even own it. Most of his female colleagues just look like any other working woman, they don't swish around like models. I saw a private Gynae this week and what I noticed most about her was how kind she was, I've no idea what she was wearing.

Just remember though that to get where they are, they've made a lot of choices that probably involved sacrificing other areas of their life (e.g. spending lots of time studying, giving up a lot of their twenties/thirties working long shifts and unsocial hours) and could have regrets in that area. They could easily be looking at you and being envious of aspects of your life that they don't have

This. I worked in health care for years, know, and are friends with quite a few consultants (most of whom do private work in addition to their NHS work). They worked bloody hard to get where they are and they have sacrificed and still do sacrifice time with their families to get and stay at the level they are.

My friend who is a consultant plastic surgeon (he specialises in facial disfigurements/ reconstructive surgery as well as cosmetic) works from 7am until 10pm every day. He does ward rounds on Saturday mornings to see his private patients and is sometimes called out over weekends due to emergencies etc. He loves his job and is amazing at it but it has come with huge sacrifices and I know he doesnt see his wife or teenage boys as much as he would like to.

My DD was born with a heart issue (all sorted now) and her consultant was young, beautiful and Irish, with a great lilt to her voice. She was married to another dr who was equally as gorgeous and she had 2 sets of twins very close together.

I was always amazed at how she was so clever, put together, mumsey and a generally nice person.

Nothing mediocre about a teaching career! That takes amazing skills that most people don't have

You're doing an important job - setting the Doctors of tomorrow on the path to success

Mediocre teaching career! Cheers for that!

I have a pair of gazelles and a nice car on my mediocre wage 😂

The child psychiatrist was wearing smart clothes-wide legged trousers etc, but with really nice Gazelles

Trousers and trainers that you could easily also wear

But these were private doctors and the OP obviously is in a position to access private treatment so can't be doing that badly.

99% of the world would envy you your wealth and career!
I'm a teacher too.

Been a doctor for nearly 20yrs….look decidedly average, dress mainly in m&s, car needs a wash, still renting. On the rare occasion that I go out in the evening I don’t tell people what I do for a living unless really pressed because it’s really not that ‘cool’ & I’d rather talk about other things. We don’t all have family money, exclusive educations, fabulous wardrobes and perfect lives!

My sister's comment regarding NHS female consultants. Easy to spot as they're slim (no time to eat) and wear good clothes 20 years out of date as they have no time to shop. So suspect that this is very much the private medicine element!

Perhaps people aren't jealous of us for the same reasons that you mentioned above (e.g. fancy clothes and status), but I do think people have a glorified image of teachers as a job where you've escaped the 'rat race' and get to spend your day doing something fulfilling while having amazing holidays, and therefore they can be a bit jealous of us in other ways (I'm also a teacher - until Christmas anyway..).

Obviously, anyone who actually works as a teacher will know that that's complete and utter nonsense, and that schools can be some of the most 'rat-racey' workplaces there ever were. But then again, you don't know what thei day-to-day workplace of these glamourous doctors is like either, it could easily be very very different to how you imagine and they need to fancy clothes and cars to make the stress of it all seem worth the effort.

That said, I'd highly recommend using these feelings as a stimulus point for considering if you'd like to make any changes, however small, in your own life? Maybe there's a promotion at your school you could apply for, or a training course (e.g. an NPQ)?

You could have seen me with my grey hair and Ford Fiesta

Nobody is envious of NHS doctors these days either.

Plus, you're teaching the future doctors. That's got to be worth something

This is very true

Many of us, maybe even most, could have studied an awful lot harder and yet would still have not been suitable doctors from an academic point of view or when it comes to other qualities.

I think that being a medical doctor just has a certain cachet that other professions do not. I have some friends who are post-doctoral researchers but they don't get the same kind of response as my friend who is a doctor.

You're a TEACHER, OP. huge respect, more respect than I have for some of DH's colleagues ( he's an NHS consultant).
These people may be slick but "We all eat, shit and die (mama)", ( can't remember who said that but it's a great leveller).
I'M proud of you, anyway and have huge admiration for what you do, OP; it most certainly isn't mediocre. Xx

Why are envious?

I get ya! When I meet a woman who looks all put together, well qualified, intelligent and warm I swoon a bit. I have the same thoughts and think I should’ve worked harder at school etc but the fact of it is I’m a bit scatty and clever enough but not a super-academic. I could never have maintained the sort of discipline to get into that line of work even if I could magic up a bit if the brains.

What I do is steal a bit of their energy off them and try to channel it - a sort of fake it till you make it approach. I do the same with CJ Crane when I have to do a presentation at work 😆

Just to give you perspective.

I have a dream of changing career and being a teacher.

I have a degree so I would just have to to the PGCE.

But I'm so afraid, I've heard it's really hard and I'd be so worried that I would fail it.

It's some people's dream to be a teacher.

If it helps I'm a GP. I come from a shit background. I am never put together. I drive a 10 yr old basic car. I earn well but am terrible with money so lurch from tax bill to pay check. I am quite smart I guess but menopause brain is erm interesting. We aren't all like that...