To not want to go to the airport 3 hours before?

I like to be at the airport earlier rather than later. Sometimes it can take an hour plus to drop bags and clear security. I don’t like the stress of being late.

Luckily my DH indulges me on this, or we compromise in the middle but even with my timing we rarely have much downtime as it’s just enough time for a meal and then a relaxed walk to the gate.

I really, really, hate the stress of being late. The one time we went with his timing we were last to board after an awful sprint across the airport and nearly missed the flight. He is more reasonable now.

Most people check in online and if only going for a couple of days just take hand luggage. Only security to get through. Not all airports are geared up for a nice meal/mooch around either. Manchester Terminal 3 being one! People sat on steps, no room in the bars etc. it’s a hideous experience.

I'm with the OP on this one. 2 hrs is more than enough.

YABU. You are supposed to be at the airport at least 2 hours before you fly. You should also allow some contingency in case there is heavy traffic getting there. 3 weeks ago I spent nearly an hour going through security at Luton airport. It was good to know that I had the time. Who wants to feel rushed and in danger of missing your flight. We usually get to the airport about 2.5 hours before we depart. If we get through security quickly we have a meal.

You really need more than 2 hours for a European flight from Dublin? I have never found that.

Not forgotten the panicking phone call from my son to say that he had missed his train stop and thus missed his flight home. No flights until the next day and he didn't have the money to transfer his ticket or pay for an overnight room.. It's one hour and I always build in extra time!

Depends on the airport too. With Dublin and Manchester, it is acknowledged that you need longer than 2 hours. Small regional airport is a different story. If you are using trains, you should definitely allow more time.

So the questions for me are

1. Which airport are you traveling from (e.g. if Newcastle, I'd be 2 hours, Manchester 3 because it's so bloody random)
2. Are you checking bags? Again that would push it out to 2.5 hours for me, 3 if your bags are in any way weird that need to go via the special baggage checkin.

The airport is a symptom not the problem. I'd be very surprised if this is the first and last time his needs to do a very specific thing in a specific way collide with your wish to do something different. If you're in a relationship with a man like this and you can't accept it and give way you're in for a bumpy ride. Honestly I'd be wondering if you were suited.

Just meet him there. He can do his mooching for an hour and you get to sit and chill at home for an hour.

I can't imagine not compromising on something so insignificant for someone I care about, but that's just me. He's already told you what he's going to be doing and to suit yourself so just do that.

Have him pay lounge entry for your three hours there

YABU.

Being late to the airport is incredibly stressful and I don’t know why you'd do it? What are you doing that's so important?

Entirely depends on what airport you’re flying from and where you’re going. We do 2 hours for shorthaul but would definitely aim for longer if going further afield than Europe where the costs and disruption of missing a flight or greater.

We were through security at east mids in 20 minutes last week..

Snap!

And we compromise by treating us to a lounge so we can enjoy the time in that.

Also the 3 hours early also builds in normal delays on the tubes/traffic. So most times you arrive early and sometimes you arrive with "only" 2 hours.

I wouldn't be impressed though if the only way he will discuss it is to say he's doing his thing, you do what you want.That isn't compromise, it won't always be a possibility in a marriage for you to each do something exactly how you want separately.

Ask if he’d like to compromise by paying for you to have access to one of the lounges. Then have a proper relax, glass of wine and a really nice start to your break with no stress. Also pay for fast track security which cuts out more anxiety from long queues.

I love hanging around the airport but then I am a bit weird. Sometimes we have to do things we don’t really want to do - it’s part of being a grown up 🤷🏼‍♀️

Last year we came perilously close to missing our return flight home from Venice Marco Polo Airport because of horrendously long check-in and security queues. We were there three hours minimum ahead of our flight time too, as hotel checkout and airport bus times necessitated it.

Good thing we were. I have never seen such total and utter chaos in any airport, and I have been through a fair few. Queues just not moving, doing automated check-in and then sent to do it all again at a manned bag drop with gridlock at that queue too because they only had one person serving what looked like thousands of people. Gridlock again at the security queue. Eventually we were expedited and put into the fast lane but guess what, gridlock there too!! Then again at passport gates and then we had to absolutely race to the gate!! Not joking!

I have never before seen a whole plane load of passengers having to run all at once to the gate, with the crew waiting to depart. I saw it that day though, and the crew told us that it wasn't a particularly unusual occurrence at that airport. Chaos was apparently the norm. Our flight wasn't the only one affected by this.

Give plenty of time. Worst case scenario is you get a chance of a relaxing drink so I really don't see the issue.

I couldn't be bothered posting for the sake of 60 minutes. I don't like being there too early, my DH does. Chances are being early was right. We never get to look in the shops, have a drink/food and take a leisurely walk through the airport so each time I am glad we didn't leave it any later. I too hate busy areas, but busy areas AND rushing is even worse.

Long term relationships are all about compromise, if you want to enjoy your trip, don't die on this hill. It's not worth the argument.

I’m with your DP I am always at the airport at least 3 hours before, often more as I have to factor in a long drive and allow for traffic. We just pay for one of the lounges, once we are through security we head straight there and that’s when holiday starts for us, wine and snacks on tap, away from the crowds and a comfy sofa to sit on

It's what you should technically do and I have had occasion in the past to be very glad I kept to that guideline. If it was Europe though (which it must be at 2 hours I guess) I think a compromise of 2.5 hours is okay. We fly a lot as a family (posted overseas) and we are always there three hours ahead, bit of a pain sometimes with kids but we have made our flights when there have been serious holdups for various reasons and it reduces stress.

So he gets there earlier and you don't, what's the issue? He's not demanding you be there.

I'm sure you can compromise together. Or you'll end up like me and my autistic partner and he stays home whilst I go alone.

He can't change and you don't want to change.

Just meet him past security. It's not a big deal.

Why does it give him anxiety if he's not 3 hours early?