Are there things you've done in the past that you still feel really embarrassed about now?

I have bipolar disorder and I was an absolute train wreck the years before I was properly medicated.

There are some things that I’ve locked away and try never to think about, I’m actually quite grateful to read it’s not just me that has moments in their past that they struggle to look back on. I had a bit of a wild past but amongst the dangerous, ill judged and illegal activities there were plenty of just plain embarrassing moments.

I lied to an ex boyfriend when I was 17
that I had a new boyfriend who pulled up outside my house on a motorbike with red roses and a guitar serenading me with Bon Jovi songs, I got my best friend to lie and back me up. The funniest thing is he actually believed me and was jealous, he only found out when I fell out with my friend a few years later and she told him I’d made the whole thing up.
He called me up and said “So the Brad guy who pulled up outside your house on a Harley and sang to you until all the neighbours came out and clapped was all in your head was it?!”
Hearing him say it and how ridiculous it was made me cringe - more for him for believing it though. He was 20 at time and it was a few years later when he called me so he was in his mid twenties and had to be told that “Brad” didn’t exist 😂.

I painted my best friends kitchen bright pink when I started over one night. It was all colour coordinated with matching accessories and appliances and she’d spent a long time getting it how she wanted it. She was horrified when she saw I’d ruined her cream and duck egg colour scheme with Barbie pink left over from her daughter’s bedroom when she was younger. I don’t know why I did it but 20 years later and she still asks me not to paint anything if I’m alone in a room in her house!

I told family members at my cousins wedding I was engaged and kept flashing off my cubic zirconia Elizabeth Duke “engagement ring” unfortunately “Brad” was unable to come to the wedding. My poor mother had to keep shaking her head and telling people I was being silly. Yes Brad had a motorbike as well 🤦🏼‍♀️.
I was sick of being treated with pity and the “ohhh is there STILL no one special” conversations and so told them I was engaged before they implied I
was going to die alone. I was only in my early twenties and no one would question me being single so young now.

Before I met my DP I had a crush on a man I worked with (Steve not Brad!) and had for years. I planned a work night out just so I could invite him and when I found out he was actually coming I spent days getting ready. I had my hair coloured, spray tan, nails done, legs waxed etc… I spent a fortune on a new maxi dress and very high heels.
I’m not used to wearing heels but assumed we wouldn’t be walking anywhere, unfortunately we all met in one bar and agreed it would be better to move to another about a 5 minute walk away.

I managed to walk next to Steve and was on cloud 9 as we chatted away whilst I trotted next to him struggling in the heels. Suddenly the heel of my shoe caught in my dress and I fell over spectacularly in a heap on the ground. Poor Steve held out his hand to help me up but I was so embarrassed that I ended up crying with shame, he put his arms round my waist to help pull me up and as he did I let out the HUGEST fart. I’d been holding my tummy in to look slim in my dress whilst we were walking and obviously had a lot of trapped wind. Steve dropped me again in shock and other colleagues came running over to see what was going on and found me in a crumpled heap sobbing with Steve standing motionless in shock wondering what to do next.

If I had just laughed it off it could have all been forgotten about and just seen as a funny but embarrassing moment, I was so bitterly disappointed that I’d ruined everything that I couldn’t stop crying and to top things off I’d hurt my ankle and couldn’t even stumble off in shame. I had to wait with all my colleagues for a taxi home as they insisted on staying to support me.
Funnily enough Steve and I never did get it together, he didn’t seem that bothered either when I told him about my new boyfriend Brad 😆 (that bits a joke!)

I’m used to constantly embarrassing myself but at least my DP is autistic and a bit socially awkward himself. I spent months building up to telling him I had bipolar disorder and was terrified of his reaction, when I finally told him he just laughed and said he’d already worked it out months ago. He’s not got a motorbike but he’ll do.

I’ve remembered another one…

I was about 23. I used to stay at my boyfriend’s house and he still lived with his parents. His dad once gave me a lift to the train station and as I was about to hop out of the car I think he must have leaned across towards me to reach for something in the glove compartment. I don’t know what thought process went through my mind, but I thought he was sort of showing me his cheek as if to ask for a kiss. So I kissed his cheek before jumping out of the car and waving bye. I have no idea why I did that but I suspect it will still make me cringe when I’m 80.

When I was at uni I got chatting to a guy at the local student indie night. After a few weeks of polite chat he suggested we go for a drink the following week. I thought he was just being friendly and wanted to be my friend so I agreed because he seemed like a nice guy. A few days later I bumped into another student indie night regular and he suggested we hang out soon. So I mentioned I was going for a drink and invited him along and I was thinking we would all have a great time chatting about music. So the following week these two lads turn up and it felt super awkward and I couldn’t work out why. They didn’t really say anything and I sat between them both trying to make conversation.
Fast forward 5 years and it suddenly dawns on me that they both thought they were going on a date. I can still clearly picture their faces and the awkward body language of one guy with his hands in his lap. Still cringing about it all these years later. What was I thinking?!? I was a very late starter with boys and had never had a boyfriend and wasn’t used to being asked out, so I was very naive 😆

So, so many things! And I replay them most nights. Some just cringe. Some terrible. In fact I've had some quite recent realisations about things that happened 20 or even 30 years ago, it has made me question whether I'm ND. As in things I just didn't 'get' before.

A terrible thing I once said. At a party with people I didn't really know that well. Just rambling really about someone I'd seen that day and they had a child and I had no idea they were a parent because they looked like a lesbian. I then proceeded to notice that there was a lesbian couple within earshot where one of the couple was pregnant. It was at that point I think I realised assuming what a lesbian looked like was ignorant. Assuming a lesbian wouldn't have a child was ignorant. Saying these things made me sound massively homophobic. I then spent the rest of my time there antagonising about whether I should say something to apologise (I probably should have) or if that would just make things worse (it probably would have) but mostly just hoping the ground would swallow me whole and I would die.

I started working in an office, my boss was a very nice man, elderly (to me) and very religious. He asked if I spoke any other languages and I said French, as I had French O level.
He said he would give any correspondence in French for me to deal with. He left a letter on my desk which I couldn't make head nor tail of, so I went to the deputy boss and said "Mr XX has put a French letter on my desk". I wondered why he looked like he was trying not to laugh. I told a friend and she told me a French letter is another name for a condom. I wanted to die.

What a beautifully phrased way to express regret. Stunning writing!

I was 10 in 2001 when my gran died and decided to write a letter expressing how much I loved her and missed her. I thought it would make my mum feel happy/better and we would share a lovely moment together when she read it.

The letter was almost entirely made up of Westlife song lyrics because they were all love songs and I loved my gran. I can still see the look on my mums face when I close my eyes.

This ^

Who says you are meant to open champagne when given to you as a gift ?

I've both received it and also bought it for others and in neither case would have opened it or expected the other person to open it .

Many years ago I wore cream to a wedding. I had absolutely no idea this was a massive no no until I read a recent thread on here. Absolutely mortified and grateful I don't really see any of those people anymore.

This is the best thing I have ever read. I need to know his reaction.
@Mercedes45
He taught me how to dance and we lived happily ever after 😂

Joking obviously! We became teenage fuck buddies and then had a really dramatic breakup that also makes me cringe.

It is a thing.

My first bar job and the busiest night always seemed to be the landlords night off.
They came back one day and said its really busy and I jokingly said its because you went out!
I have no idea why I said that, they didnt see the funny side at all and it's made me cringe to think about it ever since.

Went to a friends and stayed about four hours. After a couple of hours her parents came over. Looking back I think she assumed I'd be gone by then!

Once got a lift home from another school parent and sat outside my house chatting for about 40min . I'm guessing she was too polite to say are you going in so I just sat there blabbing away.

I'm hoping if I release these they will stop haunting me-

Very recently accused someone of not responding to a group email when they had in fact responded separately.

Accidentally called my bosses boss weird

Fifteen years ago i propositioned a younger man (9 years) and embarrassed myself

Tried to have sex with some one and ended it half way through caus he made a shitty comment. (Something about preferring a blow job)

Accidentally nearly head butted elderly mil once offering her a kiss on the cheek.

Went on a night out with work colleagues got hammered and started discussing sex toys

I'm sure there's more but every once in a while these pop in my brain.

This is the best thing I have ever read. I need to know his reaction.

Ex-girls grammar school girl staying in my male cousin's flatshare in London, he kindly slept on the floor and gave me his bed. I breezily told everyone over breakfast that he'd woken me up in the night groaning and grinding against the floor. Everyone smirked and giggled and I had no idea what I'd described. Despite having two older brothers, I had no idea what a wet dream was.

So beautifully put. I hope you are a writer.

I had no idea that you should never call unexpectedly to someone's house when I first moved to UK . But DH did so don't know why he didn't stop me . Also went to visit someone and stay over when they had a six week old baby . Never crossed my mind as I had no DC and hadn't a clue . Tried to be ironic and witty and just ended up being rude . The only thing that keeps me from being in a permanent cringe is knowing that my intentions were not meant to be unkind.

Bless you. If it makes you feel better I once wrote a letter to a guy that dumped me which was probably about 6 Diana Ross songs strung together.

Usually relationships and trying to please awful men

@MaybeItsBecauseImALodoner omg I am dying, this is so amazing 😂😂 In coffee shops in my early 20’s I used to stare off into the distance broodingly whenever emotional songs came on thinking I looked really pensive and interesting to passers by, wanker 🙃

Are we twins?!

Only my drink thing was Cinzano because it was the only alcohol name I could remember and my parents had a very dusty bottle in the cupboard probably for Christmas. It was a first date too and I was just under 18 in the pub - probably only let me in because I was the only person trying not to look dressed up - jeans and an uncool band t-shirt... we did date for five years though in the end! Cinzano in a pub in 1996... no mixer mind you, didn't know to ask for one!!!

And work, yes I hear you, I was asked: "What do you want to change?" I went first and said something along the lines of the fact that I thought that First Past The Post was a ridiculous undemocratic way of voting (thank you A-Level Government and Politics), but everyone else spoke about stuff within the company we were working for... I am blushing even as I type this (but to be fair I also still believe that!)

Yes. Awful things in my 20’s. Normally when off my face that I cringe about now I’m 40 with kids. I’m a terrible person….the shame. Sounds awful but I’m sure at the time it seemed fun and I wasn’t ashamed, which makes seem even worse now!

I have had a day of my mind playing it's favourite mortifying moments from my life. It has plenty to choose from. . .