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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not want dp to work more?

28 replies

BelleSauvage9 · 03/10/2024 23:43

3 dc (13, 2 and 1).

Dp currently leaves for work at 6:30am and gets home at 6pm (mon-fri). I'm a sahm atm.

Dp wants to start working Saturdays for a (unspecified) period of time in the hope that it will help boost career. I would be fine with this down the line when we don't have young children, but I'm against it atm as they are young and full on and I want his support and presence at the w/e. Dc1 also plays football every Saturday and I hate having to do the matches by myself with both toddlers in tow.

He says he hates being poor. I would say that we manage okay, our bills are paid, we have plenty of food, we manage to go out and do things on occasion etc. We can typically afford one uk holiday a year. I would much rather his presence than some extra money. He thinks I'm being unreasonable, am I??

OP posts:
TheBeesKnee · 04/10/2024 00:09

YANBU but financial stress is a huge factor in why many couples divorce.

Do you plan to go back to work at some point?

SD1978 · 04/10/2024 00:06

You say an unspecified period of time, but what is he estimating? How often does the promotion he want come around, does it then involve going back to Mon-Fri. I can see both sides, he is completely financially responsible for the family, and you are emotionally and practically responsible. Would this promotion give him more time? Maybe he's more concerned with your finances than you're aware of?

Anisty · 04/10/2024 00:02

You're not being unreasonable but i think you do have to suck it up as a SAHM. I was in your exact same position when i had a 6 month old, an 18 month old and a five year old. DH worked full time and then worked Sundays for an extended spell for more money. Which did come in handy at that time. I felt just the same as you at the start.

However, during that period, i became much more capable, and after a bit of self pity, i just got out with the kids myself at weekends.

DH did the Sundays for about 6 months i think. But i felt much boosted, knowing i was able to manage getting out and about with 3 perfectly well.

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