Really upset with family’s reaction

And from reading these comments, from people who apparently know better than medical professionals, they’ve said they’re feel resentful and jealous.Why would someone feel jealous of someone who has a health condition and think it’s ok to to make assumptions, their health condition is not 'bad enough’! without seeing their medical records and not understanding the process of a medical assessment.

Trust me their not giving it to every person with these conditions they are giving it to the most severe cases where people literally can't function anymore

@Liveheretoo I agree with you. None of us like paying such high taxes, but then it’s unpopular to point out we shouldnt give hundreds of pounds a month to every person with bad PMS who can’t concentrate very well

@ToWhitToWhoo I know people work and claim PIP, I didn’t say anything to the contrary?

Fact is we can’t afford to give a payout to every person with ADHD, autism, anxiety, depression. We didn’t used to give money to everyone with these issues 20 years ago? There isn’t a money tree to pay for it.

It's a big shock when you realise that a family member thinks that you're a benefits scrounger. I couldn't believe it when it happened to me. Is your mum usually so unsupportive? I would keep your business to yourself from now one but I know it's difficult as a neurodiverse person to not over-share...I do it all the time and regret it when the information is used against me!

I'd also recommend not seeking validation from others (especially this benefits bashing lot!!!). No-one understands your personal situation. People who've never had health problems don't understand and therefore their opinions are not valid. As an autistic person with chronic fatigue/burnout and anxiety who has been turned down for PIP twice, I am happy that you have had it awarded.

You do not need to ask for permission on here. Just live your life, do what's best for you. It's none of anyone's business and perhaps those people who think it is, should re-direct their anger towards large companies paying too little tax, rather than a vulnerable ND woman.

More vigorous? How many more disabled people need to die after being judged "fit to work" before you are satisfied the process is "vigorous" enough, exactly??

They’re not really obscure at all though, are they?

Excellent, the 4 millionth thread about pip and how it works and how shit the whole degrading process is, overtaken by smugarses who have no idea about illnesses and how pip works, who feel suitably qualified to be patronising and disablist.

We don't have enough of these threads.

How ? Because for you to believe that I think you have very little experience of the pip process

Of course there are always people who physically can’t work and they should be supported. I still maintain that there are many who could work but would rather claim benefits. The system needs to be more vigorous.

@PepaWepa Like many illnesses, I imagine it's the severity of the illness that dictates what sufferers can or can't do. One of my friends has ADHD and works as a GP, because she's able to control her symptoms with medication.
I'm diagnosed with GAD, but I can also control it with medication and counseling.

People who are seriously ill though may not be able to do this. That's what the OP's family isn't understanding.

She said excluding PMDD, she doesn't feel the others are a reason not to work. That seemed to include the ADHD. Also went on to talk about how she's able to work with ADHD.

So I think she was.

No absolutely there are times when I wouldn’t have been able to work, and I didn’t for about 6 months.

Bit I do think it’s important to counterbalance the comment I was replying to which basically said all workplaces are toxic and boring and working won’t help you. It did for me and I think putting out a positive experience is just as important.

I wasn’t on MN when I was at my lowest but if I had been ans read something like that it would have scared the shit out of me. I don’t think it’s helpful.

So this is what it all comes down to resentment, jealousy?!!! Your comment is absolutely pathetic.Why should OP acknowledge, her brother works hard, what to make him feel less resentful!
It’s adding to the ignorance and hatred towards people who have debilitating health conditions.
I supported my mum through, the pip assessment, all the paperwork and l found it challenging, stressful but there was no way she could have gone through this on her own, because it’s a lengthy, process.I understand people who do get pip, they’ve been assessed by medical professionals, so why isn’t that good enough for you.

And yet you engaged with the OP 🤦‍♂️🤣 you could have looked up what it meant in less time than it took you to write your original response 🤣

Aix Thank you .The worst part of it all was that my friend ,(who is in her 70s and already knows DD cannot work )said it to me .There is such a lack of understanding for MH issues .If someone was disabled, and in a wheelchair there would be much more understanding.Even though many disabled people do actually work!Older people esp seem to have this attitude .

Pip is an in work benefit to help with the extra costs of your disability, not exclusively for people who are too ill to work

Quite. On another group I used to be on, there was a woman always banging on about benefits ‘everyone is capable of working blah blah blah’.

Then she got cancer. Then she couldn’t work. Then she had to rely on benefits.

I had to sit on my hands to stop myself from pointing out the irony.

So why did you write is this the new term for pmt. Pmdd isn't pmt and that's the equivalent of saying to someone who has clinical depression so your a bit sad or saying to someone with an anxiety disorder so you get a bit nervous. It's not the same thing and it's certainly not anything new and has been a diagnosable serious mental health condition since 1985

Fyi i did before posting and tge search results said it was severe Pmt.

they werent talking about ADHD

Your brother sounds dreadful, as does your mother.

PIP is very hard to get so if the OP has been awarded this, the assessors must have been satisfied with her evidence. Your opinion is based on nothing but your own prejudices.

I think people are twitchy about anyone claiming benefits now. We have this dire picture of the country painted of the squeezed middle, the working poor and lazy benefit claimants. Meanwhile the really rich get richer.

I get UC, I work full time and it’s a couple of hundred quid a month which helps massively. I wouldn’t admit it out in The real world as every ice cream or extracurricular I buy my kids would be judged. I can hear it now “shouldn’t be claiming benefits if you can afford ballet or music lessons or decent food or shoes” I pay more in tax than I get back but in so much of the public mind it’s benefit claimer=scrounger.

I just think it’s better to keep that information private, otherwise I’ve seen people start doing math publicly. They work out what you get versus their tax bill and then have a go. It’s brutal out there you have to look after yourself.

I am so glad you are getting the space and support you need OP. People don't understand how important it is to view humans as separate to output makers with differing needs.

I have had a number of awful things, circumstantial and medical happen - I have complex PTSD after childhood sexual abuse, I had clinical depression and anorexia, then hyperemesis x3, I left a physically abusive relationship with a terrible injury to my shoulder where I was bitten by exH, I then got a diagnosis of endo, adeno and fibroids with frequent UTI's and I suspect I had undiagnosed PMDD also, all while trying to bring up 3DC. Then I had a hysterectomy and surgical menopause. I have worked full time for nearly 20 years and dealing with my conditions on top of work has stressed me out so much that I think I'll die early from a chronic stress related condition.

Honestly? I shouldn't have done this. I haven't been the best employee and 'braving it out' and flogging myself to be economically active hasn't served me or my DC. It has served Social Care and the NHS (who I have been employed by) but actually I haven't had the chance to become fully healed and parent well. I admire people like you who know their limits and want to access the space and time to get themselves functioning properly and really understand themselves before engaging with the working world. Ignore those who are projecting their crap onto you and continue to take great care of yourself