How and when did you move your child(ren) into their own room? Is this too soon?

I mean, any study in any field you can think of some uncontrolled factors, but that is a massive effect size across 4 studies, covering different countries, with no principled reason to assume that there'd be significant behavioural differences in the uncontrolled factors (you could argue that uncontrolled factors would go either way here... richer people more likely to have room for a nursery and usually following public health guidelines is higher and mortality/morbidity are lower for richer people). And obviously there will never be an RCT dictating where parents put their babies to sleep, so converging evidence from a number of less rigorous studies is always what the evidence base will be. You can argue that uncontrolled factors cross-culturally have created that huge effect size, but it's not reasonable to call it 'really flawed'... I personally think this looks like stronger evidence than much of what is seen in behavioural healthcare and would definitely follow the advice.

4 weeks, his room but I slept in with him. 4 months, I moved out. He didn't sleep through until 8 months. But he's 3 now and thriving. And he had a little brother arrive who shares his room. They love it.

Mine went in hers at 7m. I was fed up of sleeping like a sardine between dh and the cot and our snoring was waking her up sometimes too. She occasionally sleeps in our bed.

How do they know the parents who room-shared weren’t more vigilant anyway e.g. with placing baby on its back, foot to foot of cot, no loose bedding etc.— I.e. the real factors for SIDS?

As far as I can see this study only case controlled to match factors like smoking and locality, not other behavioural factors. It’s really flawed.

lots of references in here - https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article/138/5/e20162940/60296/SIDS-and-Other-Sleep-Related-Infant-Deaths

"The AAP recommends room-sharing, because this arrangement decreases the risk of SIDS by as much as 50%89,91,172,173 and is safer than bed-sharing89,91,172,173 or solitary sleeping (when the infant is in a separate room).89,172"

The guidance says wait till 6 months for them to sleep alone, but I actually moved mine at 4 months and then slept in with him for a month (i.e. slept with him for 5 months) so at least I could have my own room to chill in before going to sleep. He was very healthy and sleeping through the night once he was in his really big cot (much nicer for him than the small ones that fit next to your bed) so by 5 months I slowly felt comfortable enough with all the cameras, sleep trackers etc to have him in his own room, and it was easier to check on the camera of him to see what was going on when he made a noise without disturbing him when I was in my own room. If he'd had a nasty illness I would have slept back in with him but he's been super robust - and I do sleep in the same room as him on holiday but he has more disturbed sleep because of it.

But even if we hadn’t had sex for 6 months, I’d consider it worth it to significantly reduce the risk of my baby dying of SIDS.

What’s the evidence that — all other things being equal — having your baby in your room ‘significantly’ reduces the risk of your baby dying of SIDS? Sorry, but I don’t think such an experiment has been done because you can’t separate this from other factors. Happy to be proved wrong though.

My DS (eldest) moved into his own room from 6 months because I had lovingly decorated the nursery while I was pregnant and I was excited to use it as soon as possible. I was really looking forward to the 6 months being up!

DD was 9 months because we waited until we had moved into a bigger place.

No. I’m saying we didn’t have sex in our bedroom while the baby was asleep in there for 6 months. But even if we hadn’t had sex for 6 months, I’d consider it worth it to significantly reduce the risk of my baby dying of SIDS.
Actually though, we didnt have sex for 6 months after DC3 was born due to the hideous birth injury that left my baby disabled and me barely able to walk for 3 months. 6 years on we have a healthy sex life, are very much in love and haven’t been damaged by our dry period 😊.

I don't see why it should. You'll be going in any time she wakes to settle her, and when she wakes up in the morning. My gut feeling is that you're more likely to risk that if you leave it longer.
But hey, my babies were in their own rooms as soon as night feeds were done, at about 8 weeks so maybe I'm just a tough mummy.

Are you saying you didn't have sex for 6 months?!

Exactly. Without wishing to sound morbid, I can’t see how you’d know that your baby had stopped breathing if it was asleep in the same room as you any more than if it was in the room next door. You’d be asleep.

The only SIDS advice when I had my children was the ‘back to sleep’ campaign. There was nothing about keeping your child in your room.

I moved my son into his own room the day he turned 6 months. Ever since he was a newborn I’d breastfed him to sleep and then put him down in his crib in my room already asleep. I just started putting him down in his cot in his own room instead. He didn’t even notice the difference.

I just figured for the first 6 months of their life it was worth it to help prevent SIDS. We got back on track afterwards.

It baffles me. How does anyone have a healthy sex life if they’ve got a baby or toddler in their bedroom?!

I’m really interested in this. Is this now what mums are being told? That by co-sleeping they are helping their baby’s brain development? Ergo if you don’t co-sleep…

That sounds like an awful lot of (extra) pressure to me.

I’m no neuroscientist, but I’d be willing to bet children get most of this from their interactions when they are awake…

We moved our baby at 4 months. He has a monitor and we can hear him in his room next door anyway. He quickly then slept through the night. We used some light sleep training and it worked very quickly. I really believe a well rested mum and baby with good sleep habits is worth its weight in gold. Yes there are the odd bad nights or regressions but he's a very happy baby. Most of my NCT group have done the same.

That’s interesting - if I’d known that I might well have done things differently with DS1. But moving DS2 at 6 months was hard and I do t think it would have been easier later on, probably even harder! We all need bigger bedrooms! Squeezing the cot in ours was a challenge.

Same here. We never had the children in our bed. If they were poorly in the night we would see to them, sort them out and they would be back in their beds.

6 months for all mine, as per SIDS advice. Wasn’t worth the risk to me of going against advice as the stakes are so high. I don’t think any of them felt abandoned!

There are other areas of the house to have sex, and you can have sex in the room while baby is completely unaware of it - probably the first 6 months - and then you just need to be quiet so as not to wake them lol.

We are lucky our room is big enough that past 6 months the next to me bed gets put away and the cot is put up against the wall away from our bed though so I guess that helps.

But definitely other rooms... A whole house in fact.

My oldest was 6 months, she then took febrile convulsions and we moved her back in beside us until around 15 months. Middle was approx 1 and youngest is still in with me at 18 months- pretty complex kiddo though so feels safer to us.

I totally agree with you. My bed is a child, laptop, food and dog free zone (husband admitted subject to good behaviour hahaha). Because we need sleep and sorry but yes, sex is a healthy part of a marriage/relationship.