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AIBU?

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AIBU to overtake a hearse?

409 replies

confusedabouthormones · 01/10/2024 12:10

So today on the way home from school I had just pulled onto a dual carriageway and there was a hearse with some cars behind it. They were going to a near by crematorium. I pulled into the outside lane and drove past it.

My mother was in the car and she had a right go at me for being disrespectful and how she was embarrassed to be in my car. When I looked in my mirror no one else had passed the hearse.

Is this a thing? In my 30 odd years driving I've never heard this.

Was I being unreasonable to pass the hearse?

OP posts:
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6
sanityisamyth · 01/10/2024 12:27

It's that persons last ever journey and you couldn't wait 5 minutes?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 01/10/2024 12:27

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:25

Yes it is.

Might not be to you but to many (most people) they appreciate that it's the deceased's final journey and that's the convention

There's no issue with the hearse and cortege going slowly but there's no reason for non-relevant traffic to follow suit and it can be dangerous. Better for people to move out of way for the hearse etc. to continue its journey at conventional pace.

Mcginty57 · 01/10/2024 12:27

DavidBeckhamsrightfoot · 01/10/2024 12:22

I don't know why the hearse has to crawl about anyway.
They're perfectly capable of following normal speed.
It's not disrespectful

It's not your relative and there's no reason they shouldn't be respectful of your time.

Eh because someone's body is in the coffin in the back ffs, what a stupid comment. Would you want your loved one being rattled around in their coffin.

GasPanic · 01/10/2024 12:26

Dual carraigeway is fine IMO.

From what I have seen of hearses these days they tend to go slow during the first bit away from the house, then they tend to go at a more normal speed, but may well slow down at lights etc to keep the procession together.

I think overtaking them during the slow bit is disrespectful but the slow bit shouldn't last for long. You shouldn't really need to go past them otherwise, but if it is a multi lane road then fine.

itwasnevermine · 01/10/2024 12:26

DriverMeCrazy · 01/10/2024 12:26

I wouldn’t.
You said the crematorium was nearby anyway. What was the big rush?

Edited

Crawling along a dual carriageway is incredibly dangerous

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:26

Anywherebuthere · 01/10/2024 12:24

I disagree. It's fine to go ahead if its safe. Much better than building up extra traffic on a dual carriageway.

Don't overthink it. In fact it's fine on any road as long as it's safe. If you want to wait to be polite that's up to you but its not necessary.

Sometimes people are in a rush and there might be 20 funeral cars going slow, daft to wait for them all to pass if you can go on.

To some people it is necessary

This makes me sad to think another thoughtful action is being dismissed

DavidBeckhamsrightfoot · 01/10/2024 12:26

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:25

Yes it is.

Might not be to you but to many (most people) they appreciate that it's the deceased's final journey and that's the convention

And? They're dead.
They can go at a normal speed.
And not hold up traffic.
People have places to go.

DriverMeCrazy · 01/10/2024 12:26

I wouldn’t.
You said the crematorium was nearby anyway. What was the big rush?

Tellysavelas · 01/10/2024 12:25

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:23

They were going to a near by crematorium.

So no need to pass

Nearby is relative and could mean 10, 15, 20 minutes away. I think the police would take a dim view of cars creating traffic by following a hearse on a dual carriageway, which is designed for overtaking.

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:25

DavidBeckhamsrightfoot · 01/10/2024 12:22

I don't know why the hearse has to crawl about anyway.
They're perfectly capable of following normal speed.
It's not disrespectful

It's not your relative and there's no reason they shouldn't be respectful of your time.

Yes it is.

Might not be to you but to many (most people) they appreciate that it's the deceased's final journey and that's the convention

Anywherebuthere · 01/10/2024 12:24

I disagree. It's fine to go ahead if its safe. Much better than building up extra traffic on a dual carriageway.

Don't overthink it. In fact it's fine on any road as long as it's safe. If you want to wait to be polite that's up to you but its not necessary.

Sometimes people are in a rush and there might be 20 funeral cars going slow, daft to wait for them all to pass if you can go on.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 01/10/2024 12:24

Tellysavelas · 01/10/2024 12:23

Do you know what a dual carriageway is?!

That's the second post I've seen this week where the first poster doesn't have a clue but dishes out their ill-informed viewpoint as fact.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 01/10/2024 12:24

It's fine.

The reason you don't overtake a hearse is because splitting the hearse and the following cars is disrespectful.

On a dual carriageway it's not a problem, because you just pass the lot. Maybe don't go a million miles an hour with your engine revving, but overtaking itself is fine.

Tellysavelas · 01/10/2024 12:24

FacingTheWall · 01/10/2024 12:22

Our local crem is right next to a dual carriageway, we’d never get anywhere if we all just crawled behind all the hearses in procession every day!

Exactly! AIBU gets more nuts daily!

Mcginty57 · 01/10/2024 12:24

I don't think it's an issue on a dual carriage way as long as you don't pull back in till some way ahead. At junctions/roundabouts I always let them go if I have right of way and let the funeral procession go. On single roads you obviously never would.

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:23

MumApril1990 · 01/10/2024 12:13

I wouldn’t care about that on a dual carriageway at all. Seems stupid for everyone to go slowly behind it creating a build up of traffic?

They were going to a near by crematorium.

So no need to pass

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 01/10/2024 12:23

I would overtake on a dual-carriageway. I wouldn't zoom past but I would definitely overtake. It keeps the flow of traffic and there's absolutely no reason for drivers not part of the cortege to be driving in it or behind it.

Tellysavelas · 01/10/2024 12:23

lovemelongtime · 01/10/2024 12:11

Afraid so - perhaps just a lesson learnt

Do you know what a dual carriageway is?!

itwasnevermine · 01/10/2024 12:23

@Nanny0gg they were on a dual carriageway not a residential road. There's no way everyone can be expected to crawl behind a hearse on a dual carriageway

DavidBeckhamsrightfoot · 01/10/2024 12:22

I don't know why the hearse has to crawl about anyway.
They're perfectly capable of following normal speed.
It's not disrespectful

It's not your relative and there's no reason they shouldn't be respectful of your time.

Nanny0gg · 01/10/2024 12:22

confusedabouthormones · 01/10/2024 12:10

So today on the way home from school I had just pulled onto a dual carriageway and there was a hearse with some cars behind it. They were going to a near by crematorium. I pulled into the outside lane and drove past it.

My mother was in the car and she had a right go at me for being disrespectful and how she was embarrassed to be in my car. When I looked in my mirror no one else had passed the hearse.

Is this a thing? In my 30 odd years driving I've never heard this.

Was I being unreasonable to pass the hearse?

Were you really in that much of a hurry?

It's another respectful convention that's getting lost

FacingTheWall · 01/10/2024 12:22

Our local crem is right next to a dual carriageway, we’d never get anywhere if we all just crawled behind all the hearses in procession every day!

Grantanow · 01/10/2024 12:21

On a dual carriageway of course. And I would overtake on other roads too if my need was urgent if it were safe to do so. I wouldn't want to miss a hospital appointment, etc., given the present state of the NHS.

Salmoney · 01/10/2024 12:20

confusedabouthormones · 01/10/2024 12:15

Ah ok. I wouldn't do it on a residential road and I wouldn't split the hearse and the limo. But thought on a dual carriage way it was ok.

It is okay. MN is often weird about driving, most people seem to not have a clue. I don't know anyone that on a dual carriageway when you're in no way interrupting or cutting into any vehicles within the procession would wait behind and leave an empty lane.

Benshawsberries · 01/10/2024 12:20

On a dual carriageway it’s fine people are being ridiculous