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AIBU?

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Frightened

366 replies

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 11:01

Just been into the local cemetery walking my dog, and felt uneasy about a man who seemed to be watching me.
He went to one grave down the bottom of the hill, went to another all while watching me, he didn't have any flowers or nothing for anyones grave. He appeared to be talking to himself.
He slowly made his way up towards the hill towards me, at this point my back where to him. I felt really uneasy, so faced towards him and he was staring at me and I felt really intimidated he stopped at another grave and then faced me again staring. I felt is was not quite right and my gut instincted was going, so I decided to abandon my walk with the dog and run back to the car. Got in the car and locked myself in and come back home.

OP posts:
QueenCamilla · 01/10/2024 13:47

@Loub1987
But OP is aware of social norms and decency and her dog and her are not part of wildlife? Or maybe...🤔

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:46

@Wtafdidido so sorry that happened to you & thank you.

OP posts:
Theseventhmagpie · 01/10/2024 13:46

You did the right thing. Trust your instincts.

Wtafdidido · 01/10/2024 13:43

Always trust your instincts. I always felt super uncomfortable around someone I worked with who everyone thought was the greatest guy on earth/salt of the earth type. From the moment I worked there I felt uncomfortable or distrustful - no reason just a gut feeling. Turned out I was right as working late one night six months later he insisted on walking me back to our on-site staff accommodation. I was on high alert but could not get away and yes he did sexually assault me but luckily for me despite it being late at night a site visitor came to my rescue. Only for that witness I dont think anyone would have believed me and I lost my job for reporting him to the police as I was tarnishing the company’s image. He was charged and it went to court and I heard several years later he was doing time for sexually abusing two young children. Always trust your instincts.

RedHelenB · 01/10/2024 13:42

InSpainTheRain · 01/10/2024 11:52

Always trust your gut in a situation like that. I would log it with 101 just in case there are other instances of this. I wouldn't be going back there on my own.

Log what? Nothing happened

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:41

@ilovesooty no was only there 5 minutes.

OP posts:
IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:41

@ItWasOnAStarryNight look the cemetary is massive, If the dog does his business it is away from people. I tend to park my car and walk the dog where no one is about.
My dog loves walking in the cemetary, as do I and my friend is visiting her sons grave tomorrow while we are there, so no shes not embarassed to be there either.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 01/10/2024 13:39

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 12:58

@Casuallydresseddeepinconversation also I was not staring at the man, I would glance then look away then look back.
He was the one staring intently, it was frightening.

You seem to have hung around a long time monitoring his behaviour whilst feeling threatened and frightened.

RedHelenB · 01/10/2024 13:39

You did the right thing in keaving as you felt uneasy but I feel that there are any number of reasons for him to be there, and only one of them is to cause you any harm. Try not to dwell on it.

RedRoss86 · 01/10/2024 13:37

Maybe he was a ghost.

ItWasOnAStarryNight · 01/10/2024 13:36

"My dogs mess is picked up everytime, he has never and would never wee up the gravestones."

Such a perceptive and thoughtful dog. I've never met a dog that knows what a gravestone is, never mind one with such high morals and standards. He would never piss on one. Amazing. Your dog must be so embarrassed to be walked there then. Your friend is probably pretty embarrassed too.

For the fiftieth time, it doesn't matter that you pick up his stinking shit. It does matter that you take him there to do the shit while people mourn their loved ones.

So entitled.

EI12 · 01/10/2024 13:36

Walking a dog in a cemetery? Respect for the dead? I understand if one takes a dog to the owner's grave, but walking a dog?

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:35

@halava thank you.

OP posts:
halava · 01/10/2024 13:34

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:32

@halava I don't need to muzzle the dog, I take it as a precaution.
I am going back to the cemetary tomorrow with a friend to feel safer.

That's what I meant, I did say to use it if you see anyone around, meaning dog might get frisky.

I think you were right to trust your instincts, I would have ran out of there with dust at my heels.

Move on now and either go back or don't. You cannot pre empt everything in life.

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:34

@LemonyFace no he wouldn't.

OP posts:
Tara336 · 01/10/2024 13:34

@oakleaffy I think he was stoned. There was nothing in his demeanour when he walked into the park that made me think he would approach me but something about him scared me. It put me off that park for a while and I did actually see him again a couple months later when I was with DD and he walked past me and clearly didn't even remember me. It has affected me though I don't feel as safe as I used too

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:32

@Loub1987 yes thats right (thanks)

OP posts:
IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:32

@halava I don't need to muzzle the dog, I take it as a precaution.
I am going back to the cemetary tomorrow with a friend to feel safer.

OP posts:
Loub1987 · 01/10/2024 13:31

2dogsandabudgie · 01/10/2024 13:11

Because dogs like to sniff, and if that's the only place that the OP walks her dog then it's going to be sniffing, weeing and pooing on people's graves or on the paths. It's boring for the dog doing the same walk every day and it's disrespectful to people visiting the graves of loved ones.

I don’t find it disrespectful at all. The OP has said her dog doesn’t do that firstly. Secondly, the whole cemetery likely has foxes, rats, rabbits etc running over it all night. Peeing everywhere and worse.

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:30

@BlueGrackle I have been walking in this cemetary for 7 months now, and others do. I have not once come across dog mess everyone appears to be very respectful.
Everyone keeps there dog on a lead.

OP posts:
halava · 01/10/2024 13:30

Much ado about nothing. You reported it, you left. There the story ends.

If you choose to go back that's on you, and muzzle the dog if you see anyone around, that's a responsible action.

LemonyFace · 01/10/2024 13:29

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:13

@ItWasOnAStarryNight I never said I was shiftly glancing at him.
Glancing yes.

I'm sure he would say the same about you 😏

oakleaffy · 01/10/2024 13:28

@Tara336 That's terrifying.

A lot of angry incels about.
I had to ask a man with a Weimaraner for help too - and the young male harasser sped off on an E- scooter.

IveGotToGoToMeDads · 01/10/2024 13:27

@Mamabobogo I was glancing at him,he was staring intently at me.

OP posts:
Mindymomo · 01/10/2024 13:27

I have a border collie and we often walk through our local Church graveyard, there is a little walk through copse that everyone is welcome including dogs and all sorts of wildlife including foxes and deer live there. I must admit I wouldn’t walk in there alone as we have a few people living in their cars outside the Church..