My mum has bought DD a dress knowing we won’t like it.

@MissScarletInTheBallroom I think the OP has used the example picture from Etsy or wherever, not the actual one with her DD's name on. In any case it's all separates, someone may well buy the skirt / socks / headband from the charity shop if that's their taste. The vest can go under other stuff at this time of year and through winter.

My DS has a vest that's a souvenir from Croatia (and says as much on it). We've never been there. It was 50p in the charity shop and my DH thought it was cute so DS wears it. He's a tiny baby, he couldn't care less and neither could we.

Your problem here is that you’re allowing her to keep going with the disrespectful behaviour by actually putting the kids in the clothes you don’t like, and she knows you don’t like them.

“she will ask over and over if they've worn them or expects to see them wearing them” - you need to say no it’s not my taste so I prefer not to put them in that outfit. Certainly don’t put them in the clothes when you know you’ll be seeing her as that just validates her choice.

she said she saw a "lovely" outfit for the baby I'm currently pregnant with. I said I don't like it. She said she was buying it anyway. - then your response should be “that’s up to you but I won’t be putting her in that dress so you will be wasting your money.”

Make her see that she can’t force you, don’t be a pushover.

I have twin girls and people go crazy with the pink and frilly, especially matching.

It all goes straight to charity.

Why do you think the charity shop won't shift it? Lily is a really, really common name - I'm sure someone will spot it and buy it. And if not, well, it's hardly any different to all the other toddler stuff that ends up in landfill.

Because girls aren’t dolls to dress up just to please Grandma.

Yes but then the charity shop are going to have the problem of shifting it, and they're no more likely to find someone who wants it. Ultimately it's destined for landfill.

It's not even a dress though.
It's a bodysuit - which I expect will get worn several times as babies go through like 3 a day.
A headband (my daughter would have pulled it off in seconds), socks - I mean they're socks and a frilly skirt.
The baby herself will probably decide if she likes the skirt (pulling it off or crying).
Such a load of fuss about nothing.

Because it's a truly horrible dress I guess. But then I think she sounds just stick the thing on fire a photo and move on.

Hideous, but why not stick her in it for a few photos. It's just a dress albeit not a very nice one.

So glad I’ve got a boy!

I was taught to change the way I react to things rather than try to change others (all in relation to my mum riding roughshod over me years ago and me getting upset about it).

My reaction would be... "oh how cute, she will look lovely. Photo photo... oh no, she's pooed in it, what a shame I'll need to change her". Off it goes! Everyone happy.

Do people really not care how wasteful it is to spend their own good money, and the earth's dwindling resources, on something that will be worn grudgingly for 2 minutes? Does that really give you pleasure?? If you think a dress is cute, but you know the only person with a child the right age to wear it would hate it, why not just admire it on the rack for a few seconds and then go about your day? I really just don't get it.

And then it's not just the one photo... it then takes up space in your (very limited) drawer space, making you feel guilty until you eventually cart a massive bin bag of clothes to the charity shop (because people like this never just do it the once, it's every other bloody week a new useless item you have no need for, that you specifically told them you don't want). It's not about you, it's not being thoughtful and generous, it's purely about their consumeristic desire to BUY BUY BUY OOOH SHINY PRETTY BUY BUY BUY. If you're so obsessed with buying things for the sake of it, just get a doll and buy it some clothes and clutter up your own house.

Jesus that’s so tacky. Why are people defending it?!

Well, it can just be stuck in the bag for charity then.

Pretend you love it, spoil her fun. Do a photoshoot.

I can’t understand why she needs you to collect it from her either? Can she not just give it to you when she sees you as a present?

(Have already replied saying YANBU for other reasons)

Oh dear. Awful dress. I agree that you should take a photograph of her in it and send it to her granny. No harm in that. When your daughter is 2 or 3 and starts to have - ya know - opinions, will you let her wear something like that if she likes it, or do you have to approve?

I remember DP's mum bought my eldest a little pair of camouflage style trousers when he was about 18 months. I hated them, but I put them on him to visit her. And he absolutely loved them FFS🤣 Couldn't prise them off him. They were practically in shreds by the time he grew out of them.

No, it's not, but the chances of finding someone who has a baby named Lily who is about to turn one and wants to take this outfit off her hands are quite low.

It’s awful and I wouldn’t be putting it on my daughter.

I’m not making it into a big deal, just pointing out what a ridiculous statement it was that the parent's opinion on what their baby wears is no more important than that of an internet stranger. Clearly you can’t see that so I’ll disengage now.

It's so cute!

Well, yes, as in it doesn't really matter what anyone thinks of it. It's just a dress, it's not like she's been given a Nazi uniform or a copy of Mein Kampf.

It's not hard to take a few photos of the baby wearing it and donate it. It really doesn't have to be the big deal you're making it into.

I would say thank you mum, but I dont mean to be rude/ungrateful but I dont really like the style of it

I would be annoyed if my mum did that knowing it wasn't to my taste, very annoyed.
I dont really like the dress btw