To think my life is too grown up for my age?

It’s swings and round abouts.

You’re getting your head down now and saving so life can be a little easier/living in a better place etc sooner and then when you reach those goals you’ll be more comfortable to be able to have more “fun”

where as your friend is doing the “fun” things now and now concentrating so much on upgrading her living conditions etc and therefore won’t reach those goals as soon as you.

it’s all about balance and thinking about what’s important to you.

24?

Deeply boring to me at that age. I travelled the world, had fun, had a variety of great jobs, lived in great places in London. My 20s in London were incredible.

But you have settled down and good for you. Not for me. Everyone is different.

It just depends which way round you want to do things. DH and I worked our backsides off and worked, worked and worked. Had two children by 28 and bought our property at 25. We are now 38 and 39, morgage free and visit the world with our children. Whilst my brother who is 3 years younger, did it the other way round, but is now 35 and just had his second child. I will be child free sooner, but who knows what the future holds.

I would say you're ahead of the game. If I were your friend, I'd be worried that I was behind it.

Getting started on the important things while you're in your 20s is a good way to go.

There's a hugely wide range of what's 'normal' in your mid 20's.

Living at home is normal. Having a mortgage is normal. Some people are planning weddings and/or babies. Others are clubbing and/or travelling at every opportunity. Some are still studying or thinking about what careers they might want, others are becoming well established in their chosen field.

There's no right or wrong, that's the beauty of it! As long as you are happy with your choices, don't worry about what anyone else is doing.

It sounds more like you don't have a good work/life balance.
Maybe you want to think of moving to a cheaper area so that you can free up some cash and time for now of the things you'd like to do now.

It’s not about the age you are. Yes, I spent my 20s out on the lash, flat sharing, partying and not really thinking about the future. When I settled down though it was because I met someone I wanted to stay with and build a family with, not because I’d hit 30. I’m in my mid 50s now and plenty of my friends from back then still live that life. I dip in and out with them but couldn’t do it all the time, I’d be knackered!

Everyone is different there is no rule that says at a certain age you have to behave a certain way. What matters is what feels right for the individual.
You sound as though you think you are missing out though. You should think about what is important to you and why you are not content

It all depends on what makes you happy. I spent my 20s living in London, working and playing hard. It was the 90s so the club scene was amazing, and we volunteered at festivals so got free tickets. I met my husband and we were able to rent a gorgeous little flat, and we kept on partying until we decided to have a baby in our thirties. We would be better off financially if we had bought our flat for 60k ( now worth ten times that), but I am glad I didn’t as I have such brilliant memories, and if we had bought then we would probably have lost any gains in the Irish recession when house prices halved, as we moved there after London. The secret is to do what you want to do, not what you think you should be doing. If you feel your life needs shaking up, just do it! You only get one shot at life, I’m glad I didn’t waste it.

It's impossible to know what you'll regret when you're fifty/sixty/seventy ....

But it doesn't sound much fun to me. And you'll never know if this boyfriend will be with you for life. If he ups and leaves (or you do) when you're 45, will you wish you'd had more fun when you were young and energetic?

I don't think it's a matter of age.
I'm 45 and I'm very sociable and need to see friends / go to parties / very often. Clubbing maybe once a month.
All my friends are the same. Middle-aged, urban, childfree, some disposable income, probably pathologically immature but who cares.

Anyway, if you're happy that way, that's all that matters.

Sounds like my twenties, but I know adulthood is postponed longer now. Agree with others, living a life consistent with your wants and needs and values, that has meaning and purpose and a balance of 'kicks' and contentment, along with coping resiliently with the usual struggles and suffering that life brings, is the stuff of living well. Don't compare, do plan.

Worked in international development and circuses and am reasonably certain I lived in a wooden hut in a circus at that age - we’re all different !

Depends very much what you want, I was the same as you but yearned for the other life, but was stuck in a dead end relationship and had slipped into a dynamic I didn't want yet. Left at 30 and lived it then 🫣🤣

Everyone's lives are different op! I wasn't a clubber whatsoever at uni and I was happily married with a baby on the way by aged 24. Do what makes you happy.

As long as you are happy that’s all that matter.

I’m early 30s, mortgage, 2 kids, full time job etc. I still have friends with no kids, renting a falling to bits flat and spending all their money going to creamfields.

Theres no rights or wrongs in life, just what makes you happy.

When I was your age I was engaged, saving for my wedding and a house. The idea of going raving filled me with dread, I wouldn’t have been happy living that lifestyle but of course it’s great fun for other people.

When I was just a kid I was basically raising my younger sister. I got her up, dressed, fed and to school in the morning, the whole lot. Parents were alcohol/ mentally ill. I left home at sixteen and had to fend for myself. That was having to be too adult for my age.
What you’re talking about is more life style than life stage. You’re an adult, you can live your life how you want to. You sound like you’re very sensible and making good life choices.

Well I was pregnant at 24 and will now spend the rest of my twenties looking after a young child/children. So you could say I'm "too grown up" as well, but this is the life I want. I tried the partying/travelling life at university. It wasn't really for me and I wasn't interested in continuing it all throughout my twenties as I was already bored of it. I've always wanted to be a mum and I'm much happier now. Everyone wants different things.

Any life style is fine at any age if you’re happy. If not then change things.

Are you happy? Comparison is the thief of joy. If you are happy in your relationship, job, life etc then that's all that matters.

If I could go back in time I’d want to do what you’re doing. You can go to festivals and whatever at any age but building a strong foundation for a secure future would be my priority. It’s all down to whether you’re happy or not with your life.

You shouldn’t compare yourself to anyone else.

If you are happy with it, then it’s fine.

We all have different lifestyles and there is no right way to enjoy it.

I work FT, am a single parent and studying so I do tend to go home after work and do chores, studying, relaxing and sleeping.
But I feel my life is moving very fast and I’m not experiencing as much of life than I can be and I don’t want to regret it in a few years time.

So I make sure I stay up later on the weekends and socialise in some way.
Twice a week I now do a club.
And once a month I am going to do something I wouldn’t normally (nothing huge just going to a museum or different area etc).

I love being at home though and I pay my rent so I’m going to enjoy it.

I think sometimes you do have to schedule/push yourself into doing things, as it’s very easy to get into the trap of not doing much.

I think its down to personality rather than age. I had a mortgage, was engaged and got pregnant at 24. With hindsight I wish I'd waited until 30 to have DC but I wouldn't have been out every night, I'm too introverted and need time to recoup from socialising.

You do you OP. If you’re happy generally and you are excited about the things you’re saving for (genuinely excited for yourself- not doing it because your partner wants you to!) then great. I think your work ethic and attitude towards saving while still having some fun sounds great and will set you up nicely for the future.

The only red flag here is that you are asking the question. If you long to be more carefree then do it. Do you feel that your partner stifles you at all? That’s what you need to be really honest about yourself with. You might have set up a home together but you haven’t got married, had kids or bought a house together. Break ups happen all the time and are hurtful and horrible to go through but if a relationship isn’t right then they need to happen.

You’re front loading. Working long hours and saving now so you can promote in your jobs and buy as soon as possible. It’s a typical early 20s decision for people in a settled relationship, I did the same.
My single friends travelled more then, I travel more now.
The question to ask is are you happy? Did you feel you weee missing out before you started to compare? If not, stop worrying.