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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not take full bereavement leave?

33 replies

MelMar1 · 29/09/2024 16:14

I’m a teacher and our school offers 5 days for a bereavement of a grandparent, which unfortunately has occurred for me. AIBU to think I should go back sooner than five days, because that is the maximum? Or is it acceptable to take what is offered? I hate this teacher guilt at a time when I’m already so upset.

OP posts:
noweddingnocry · 29/09/2024 16:31

Actual businesses offer 1-2 days -if you get offered 5 you are lucky .
Taxpayers are paying for it .

Ineffable23 · 29/09/2024 16:29

Do you need/want 3 now and 2 for the funeral (day before and day of?) to support your parents? I don't know if that's an option but that would probably be what I would do if I were you.

anicecuppateaa · 29/09/2024 16:29

Totally up to you. I didn’t take any when my grandma died earlier this year. I was offered 5 days when dd died a few years ago, thank goodness workplaces are more compassionate now.

Doggymummar · 29/09/2024 16:28

Depends how you feel. That's very generous.

Longtimemento · 29/09/2024 16:27

Utterly down to you,kind of depends on how you are feeling! My gp’ s were all expected deaths of very elderly people whereas for other people their gp’s were like a second set of parents.

Fifthtimelucky · 29/09/2024 16:20

I didn't have any bereavement leave when my grandparents died.

The first died when I was a a teenager (during the school holidays). I was working when the other three died and no doubt could have taken some time, but - much as I loved them (one in particular) they were all in their mid 90s and I didn't feel the need to take any time off except to attend their funerals.

Salmoney · 29/09/2024 16:19

Take it for sure, 100%.

mushpush · 29/09/2024 16:16

Take what you need!

It's a tough time, if your colleague was off for the same reason - you'd have nothing but sympathy. Screw the guilt, offer yourself the same kindness you'd show someone else going through the same situation.