To not be there when my dog is put to sleep?

Don't do this. The animal hearing your voice is the sort of thing that will have it looking round for the person it associates with the voice. They don't understand how phones work and that the person is not in the room.

We had to have our dog PTS 2yrs ago.

I couldn't be with him as I had covid.

Still can't shake the feeling that I let him down in his last moments.

I would not want to be there, even if I was taken the pet to the vet myself. I would just say goodbye and give the pet to the vet.

Agree. It's about them, not you.

I couldn't be there for my cat (lived 12 hours away) so I rang the vets and said goodbye to her over the phone. Could that be arranged? I flew down for a rabbit (one hour flight) but just missed her. I'd have felt very guilty not trying, though.

I did not want my elderly cat to see a stranger in her last moment of life, so I was there. I wrapped her in a towel and held her while she got the injection and went to sleep forever. It sill makes me teary thinking about it...

But if you already have a family member there you don't need to be there. Also the dog might get agitated with several people in the room so it might be a better option as well from that point of view.

Animals do not look around for their owners. Anthropomorphic bullshit to make people who are losing their pets feel guilty as well as grieving their loss. Stop perpetuating that myth.

The decision to remain with a pet while they are euthanased is a deeply personal one and what is right for one person will not be the same for another. I will always be there for my pets. My H cannot bring himself to do it, because he has a very visual long term memory and would be stuck with that video replaying in his mind for the rest of his life. It does not mean he loves them less than me.

I feel people who have been through this experience understand and know, what it’s like, how their dog is, before they’re put to sleep.
A dog does have awareness, l held my little dog when she was put to sleep, wrapped in her favourite blanket, l kept her close to my chest, continually spoke to her.When my mums dog was put to sleep(both dogs were elderly, mine 19 yrs old mums 17 yrs old) l supported my mum, she was very upset so l stayed with her dog.
Going throughout this, l feel it’s so important the dog is with someone, who he/she has a close bond with.I needed to be there, not just for my dog and mums, but also to say goodbye, make sure they went with dignity, that the last face they saw is the person that they loved.

I think you should go and say good bye to her. Spend time with her for her last couple of days.

The fact that you would even use the word "killing" here suggests that there is something very wrong

I echo the words above. I think you may regret not being there.

I really hope thats sarcasm

You may feel regret afterwards it if you don’t go. It isn’t necessary for everyone to the there for your dog’s final moment, in fact the vet would probably prefer it is just one person. But could you go to support your parents? Sorry for your loss 💐

Of course you should go. It’s about them not you

Eight hour round trip for you, parents will be with her - you don’t need to go. If its a gradual decline, she’s not suffering, you could have a last visit and enjoy one another’s company for the weekend if you want to.

Ideally, the animal should, imo, have a loved one with them. My heart still aches at the memory of having to hand over a v dearly loved dog to the vet during the first lock down. As long as she has one of her people, it does not have to be you.

This bit makes me think you should be there her. She loves you and you would bring her comfort and joy at the end, which will make you feel good about the last part of her life.

But of course if you can’t be there, you simply can’t be there, and there’s no guilt or shame in that.

I'd go.

But you have to do what is right for you.

Go. Spend a few days with your dog and take a lot of photos and videos. Fill her last days with happiness and make good memories for yourself. I think you’ll regret it if you don’t see her again.

For me I had to see my dog one last time. She lived with my parents. I got her during high school but moved away for university. My parents’ house was her home so she stayed there. She loved them and they loved her. When the time came we were one day away from driving to them for her to be PTS when my dad rang to say that she’d died. I wish we’d gone the previous week. As soon as we could we got in the car and drove the 5 hours to get there that day. Being able to see her, touch her and be there for her burial helped to give me closure. It’s been 16 years but even now I’m tearing up.

You have to be there for the dog won’t she be looking for you ?

Im not a “crazy dog person” . Although I do have dogs . You have to put your emotions to the side and it will be very hard but you have to be there for the dog who is yours and you are hers.

Im sorry for you OP but also your poor dog.

🩷

If you don't go OP will you wish you had in future?

@DinosaurMunch Anyone who has had a close relationship with a dog will know that for many dogs proximity to their owner is incredibly important so I can totally imagine that dogs, separated from their owners will look for them. There is a connection.

In this OPs case the dog isn't constantly with her so I don't think that applies.

I'd go - it would be worth the travelling for me to be able to think that I might have made her last day one of 'Oh, great, my Salair is here'.

This is not true it's just a load of anthropomorphic rubbish made up.for clicks. Dogs don't have that level of awareness. Lots of vets dislike going to the vets which is a different issue. They certainly don't know they are being put to sleep. It's a quick and painless process.

Dogs will pick up on all the emotion and stress portrayed by their owners. A few tears is fine but sometimes people get completely hysterical which is definitely not helpful in a peaceful passing.