I hate how I've let myself go

Buy yourself some sugar free sweets (Wethers or M&S do good ones) and keep a few handy. It won’t work if you’re starving but sometimes it helps when you crave a flavour or something in your mouth.
After food clean your teeth so you won’t feel
like eating more - it won’t taste as good and it’s a faff to reclean them twice.
Have peppermint tea after meals -
aids digestion and is strangely filling. Also no energy rise and crash like coffee.

I was exactly like u then mu son started going school so I got time to concentrate on myself but my first goal is losing weight as I k know I will never feel good until I'm slimmer , I shaved my legs today which is a plus ! 😂

To lose weight you don't need to exercise, you don't need to spend money at all.

Download a free app like MyFitnessPal, figure out your calorie goal to lose weight at a reasonable pace (1lb a week is fine) and stick to it, eating your normal foods but less of them.

You'll have the weight off in no time and feel so much better about yourself when you can look in the mirror and like what you see, plus seeing a mum that cares for her appearance and isn't unhealthily large is a good example to set for your kids. You don't want them growing up thinking being overweight is normal and inevitable.

Yes life is exhausting, but thankfully losing weight doesn't have to be. Don't buy into the nonsense about needing groups or hours per week or fancy food or pills. If you start tomorrow you'll be a pound lighter this time next week and you'll see the difference within a few weeks. You can do this, millions of other people do, you're not special! In the nicest way possible :)

2 litres is perfect. Nothing dramatic will happen today! But you are on your way to refreshing your whole digestive and waste system, rehydrating and flushing out water retention which isn’t weight lost in the true sense of fat loss, but still loses inches and makes you feel less bloated and lethargic.

How goes it op? About 1500 yet?

Just had my third pint. Is 2 litres Actually enough to make a difference?

I know how hard it is to feel like you have no time for yourself and the hit it can take on your confidence. This is easy for me, an Internet stranger to say, but you are being so so hard on yourself. You’re busy and spend all day putting other people’s needs first, but it won’t be this hard forever. For now, focus on the basics. Try to sleep as much as you can, get some walks, drink enough water and protect your mental health as much as you can. As others have said here, it’s the small things that can start to turn it around for you and it starts with showing yourself some kindness x

You’ve identified very low motivation levels are the main problem. So you have two choices. Either you accept that your unwillingness to make any changes means things won’t change, and learn to accept how you look and feel now.

Or you force yourself. Huge effort, no excuses for a few weeks, which should be enough to start to make the habits stick. Have a habit tick-sheet: water, steps, exercise twice a week.

Have you tried weight training? Main draw might be that between sets you can spend a minute or two on your phone!

Are you wrangling kids while your DH is playing Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen every evening? If that’s all he has time to do at night, he needs to start doing much quicker dinners, so he can watch the kids while you go for a walk, or do a load of laundry while it’s cooking. Standing at the cooker with a podcast on is a luxury.

I think the best thing you can do is find the type of exercise that you really enjoy so it doesn't feel like another chore. When you find the right thing, it will help you relax and give you a buzz like chocolate does. But I appreciate that time is an obstacle currently. But every little movement you do is worthwhile, I don't think it's true that just going to the gym once a week would be pointless. It would be valuable even in that it would be something you're doing just for you. And also really beneficial physically. I'd cut out alcohol and try decaf tea in the evening if you're not already to try to improve your sleep. Twinings English Breakfast decaf is great! You will get back to yourself. It's so hard having little ones.

You should see my ankles and lower legs once I started drinking far more water - honestly thought I had a muscle wasting illness

Joining in the challenge! Downed my first pint before lunch. Now sipping my second with lunch

Yes life gets complicated op and you are not the only person who lets it get ahead of them. It sounds as though you prioritise your Dc and lots of people I see put on weight from that route. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.

With the pasta dishes, if you try having one of your glasses of water just beforehand, you might find you eat a smaller portion. Though if you don’t, I guess it might just stretch your stomach which isn’t really what you are aiming for! Do other posters have experience with the drink before a meal approach?

Well done @rustyspoon45, you are taking the first steps. I am also trying to drink 2 litres of water today and am on about 750 ml so far. I've got a half day off work today as have a function this afternoon/evening, so I'm going to try and get a litre done before I go, and another litre while I'm out.

My next step is to have some yoghurt and fruit for breakfast/in the morning instead of a pastry and a sausage roll. I had chocolate cereal and a yoghurt this morning, so will be starting this change from tomorrow. Then next week I'll think of another small change to introduce.

We can do this!

Great news! You are well on the way to a target by this evening op!

What activities is your older kid doing that he can't manage the little one by himself? My youngest was always eg on poolside with a sticker book or waiting outside of some class or other with me while the oldest did the activity and DP was in work.

You’re doing one small thing, that equals a step in the right direction. 😇

Can you get out for a big walk with your little one? Walking can make weight loss so much easier aswell as being really beneficial for overall health.

Well here’s a willpower moment: between now and about 1 pm I’d try sipping your second 500mls. You want to finish your final intake around 7 pm so you aren’t up peeing in the night! 💦 But by 7pm you can oat yourself on the back that you’ve taken a first step.

That's should have said slimming world not *teaching you about nutrition

With diet and exercise you have to build it into your life.
So the small changes that people are suggesting are good.
The thing is with slimming world...most people just put it back on once they stop. The way it's structured etc calling things syns etc aren't tracing your about nutrition.
Loosing weight doesn't just happen, it takes hard work.
You seem to be in a cycle of not fuelling yourself properly, which can affect everything! Then you crash and feel tired.

Me and my husband meal plan for the week (we do sometimes go off plan) but it's easier to do that and for calorie intake etc.
It needs to be a family way of eating and not just you.

I struggle with my weight and it's a battle to keep my BMI under 29/30. Ideally I need it under 25 but it's so hard.

With exercise you have to plan...and just do it. Even if you can't be bothered. You need to find something that you don't hate (I can't say enjoy as I do hate it at the time but feel better after).

My husband exercises early morning (gets up 5:15am)
I work 13 hour shifts
I exercise either evenings and since my little girl started school I sometimes do morning after school run.

Once it becomes normal and part of everyday life it does become easier.
But it's still a struggle with weight. I think for me it will always be..

I could manage it maybe once a week but what's the point? That won't make any difference to anything.

Change this, once a week is better than not going at all, it's all about making the effort. This once a week may just be that, but by making the effort with that, you're heading in the right direction, even if it's just a little at a time. Viewing it the way you describe makes it sound like you have just given up instead of grabbing that time and doing something with it for yourself and making the most of what little time you have.
It would make a difference, it's the difference between doing something positive, even if it's very small rather than just not bothering. Personally, I think it comes down to the right attitude and motivation. You could have all the time in the world but without the right attitude and motivation, it still wouldn't happen and you'd still feel like crap.

I agree. You need to talk to this man about a more equal distribution of the domestic/childcare load.

Men don't seem to have much problem carving out time for themselves. Don't be a martyr!