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Original poster

Would you take on c. 10K debt to have one chance of another child?

107 replies

ohcrapimuseless · 28/09/2024 19:58

Just it really.

Would you take on c. 10k to have the chance of having another child? (likelihood of one round working less than 20%, would need ICSI, multiple health / age risk factors associated with pregnancy loss / infertility / high risk pregnancy).

A friend told me they wanted to do 'everything they could' do assure themselves they had tried to have another baby hence doing rounds of IVF. But they are loaded / piles of inheritance / no mortgage so not needing to take on debt. It's made me feel like I'm not committed to giving my child a sibling and that I can't be sad because I'm not trying hard enough. I can't think straight on this and feel utterly overwhelmed.

YABU - I wouldn't take on that debt for less than 1/5 chance
YANBU - I would take on that debt for less than 1/5 chance

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 28/09/2024 20:07

No

wafflesmgee · 28/09/2024 20:06

It would depend on how/if/when I could repay that debt, as it would affect my current child if I couldn't repay it. If I could, over 10 years, and my current child was under 5 then yes, maybe
If I couldn't, or not within 20 years then no, because i would see that ten grand as better spent making a difference for my current child e.g. for a house deposit/wedding/university fees.

ReturnoftheBink · 28/09/2024 20:03

OrwellianTimes · 28/09/2024 20:01

No I wouldn’t take on £10k of debt for an 80% change of heartbreak.

I’d rather plough my love and attention and finances into the one beautiful kid. Having no sibling isn’t the end of the world.

Edited

This.

IVFmumoftwo · 28/09/2024 20:02

If it were me I would probably would but be very strict that it is only that one chance. You need to know when to draw the line. Obviously it is complicated by having another child and you feel guilty saving thousands which you could spend on your existing child but on the other hand you will be thinking what ifs a lot. It isn't an easy decision and some do have endless money.

CitrineRaindropPhoenix · 28/09/2024 20:02

I would be very nervous about it. It would depend on loads of things like age, current and future earnings, mortgage and how likely it is that it will be paid off by retirement, pension etc.

It isn't an easy question at all. Deciding to stop at 1 healthy much loved child and not taking on the physical and financial risk of ISCI is a decision nobody should criticise you for.

OrwellianTimes · 28/09/2024 20:01

No I wouldn’t take on £10k of debt for an 80% change of heartbreak.

I’d rather plough my love and attention and finances into the one beautiful kid. Having no sibling isn’t the end of the world.

rainingcats · 28/09/2024 20:01

If I had no children then I would spend that without a question.

If I had a child I just couldn’t. It is a lot of money for a fairly small chance of success.