To offer this man no explanation

If you are worried to tell him it’s over before it ever really started for some reason (crazy stalker vibes etc) I’d go for “Who is this? Why are you messaging my wife?” He will run for the hills.

It doesn’t matter what he thinks - why do you care?

Reply “yeah you’re right I have been slow to reply. I think it’s because I don’t see this going anywhere. Thanks for the chat, let’s leave it there.”

During a brief period on a dating site, if I told a man I wasn't interested he generally started insulting me. This happened half a dozen times.

So my advice is to say, thanks for the messages, but I am not interested in meeting up anymore, best of luck (or similar) and then block him.

You're making this so weird. Just tell him you're not interested already and move on with your life.

Reply ....

We're not compatible. I hope you find what you're looking for.

Block.

Sounds like he did want to meet up though? The OP just refuses to do anything on a weekday evening.

Just tell him you're no longer interested. That's all. Any explanation you give him will encourage him to argue/wheedle/offer to "fix the problem" but you're way past that and know you're done, so don't waste your time.

You don't "owe" him anything, and obviously the normal caveats about breaking up in person didn't apply since it's a purely virtual connection, but it would be both polite and efficient to break it off cleanly. Then if he continues to contact you, feel free to block him without further discussion.

This.

It’s one of two reasons - Either they want an ego boost because they’re married or have commitment issues but still want to know that other people find them attractive and engaging, or secondly, they’re lonely but have issues with self esteem and think that if they meet someone in real life they would be put off for whatever reason, so they use texting as a way to build human connection without the pressure of actually meeting and then freak at the suggestion. I think deep down people want to date and find love but can’t bring themselves to sometimes.

Look, do what you want OP. You will anyway. As others have said, I’d send a quick message saying you’re not feeling it, best of luck and then move on.

I’d find it irritating, I would just sent a brief but polite text telling him that you’ve lost interest, you don’t see this going anywhere and you wish him all the best. Done!

It sounds like he’s texting multiple women, possibly dating some of them too, and is just keeping you on the backburner for when it suits him.

I find it really creepy when men you’ve met online ask you for additional photos. I mean what do they need more photos of you for? 👀

It’s not in your best interests to leave him hanging as he will either keep annoying you with texts or turn nasty.

I had to send a similar text to this guy I’d met online about 8 months earlier. We were speaking for a few weeks last year then it fizzled out and he randomly messaged me this summer. Started talking again and then after about a week I could see it was going nowhere again - the most he had done was mention talking about going for a “friendly coffee” but no firm plans. And when pushed he couldn’t define what a “friendly coffee” was, super unclear if it was a date or not 🤔so I felt he was probably a serial dater who tried to collect “female friends” rather than out of a serious intention to find a life partner. I just said his intentions were unclear, I was no longer interested and wished him all the best.

I did block him after that text because there was nothing left to say and unfortunately some men can be aggressive when turned down. Although I doubt he’s lost any sleep over it!

I don’t think you need to agonise over this. Just say you don’t think it’s working out, all the best and block him.

Just message him and say - I'm sure you're a lovely guy but I'm not feeling it, all the best.

End.

‘Hi Bob
I really don’t think this is going anywhere. Best of luck with your search’

Copy and paste

Ghosting is mean

Why on earth don’t you just do the grown up, courteous thing and say something like “it’s been fun chatting, but I don’t think i’m going to take this any further. Wish you luck for the future!”

Never mind him, do it for YOU, for your own personal growth. If you can’t communicate or make an effort, you won’t ever find what you’re looking for in a relationship.

He sounds annoying but I can't believe so many people are advocating blocking him for that. What's wrong with just dropping him a quick message to explain and then simply ignoring any further messages? Blocking feels so OTT and childish/cowardly in a situation like this when people can simply communicate.

Block then.

A lot of married men do it

Then literally just walk away from this situation. Block, move on.

‘Oh really that’s a shame, mine have also been slow because of work and I’m about to get even busier so don’t hold your breath on the speed thing. In fact I think call it a day really. Hardly got time to butter an egg between you and me. Ta-ra’

I read once that if you want a man to be interested, ignore him.

And it works. Sadly. The minute they think you are chasing they are not interested, but when they have to chase you it becomes a game they want to play.

"Its been nice talking to you but I am seeing someone now and think that continuing to message wouldnt be fair on him. Take care" Ok so its a lie but so what?

If the communication is not there now...

You seem to be cutting your nose off to spite your face. You don't want his messages anymore yet you won't deal with it like an adult and either let him know (most decent option) or just block him. Instead you're allowing the messaging to continue and take up headspace. So not sure what you want anyone to say?