Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think a three year old can’t do this?

232 replies

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 16:40

Ds finishes preschool at 3. I don’t get home until 4.

DH thinks ds can just watch tv and entertain himself (dh wfh Fridays) I think he’s too young, what do others think?

OP posts:
ButterAsADip · 27/09/2024 20:28

If DH is there to put the telly on and change the channel every so often and sit next to DD and provide her with snacks then yes that’s perfectly doable for an hour in our house. DH WFH all over the place with various children on him and chores to do (but he’s mainly just on the phone not typing or anything).

(I’ve said this before on MN and been told DH will imminently get the sack but it’s worked perfectly fine for years and everyone is always saying hi to everyone else’s kids on Teams 🤷🏻‍♀️)

oustedbymymate · 27/09/2024 20:25

So can't he just work a little longer as presumably he's taking time out to do the school run?

Beautifulweeds · 27/09/2024 20:23

No effing way, eyes on them all the time! X

Beezknees · 27/09/2024 20:23

Depends on the child as others have said but I really don't think wfh with a 3 year old is good.

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 20:23

He nips out to get him from preschool and then comes home but that doesn’t take long.

OP posts:
oustedbymymate · 27/09/2024 20:20

How is DS getting home from preschool? If DH brining him can't he just make up the time after you get back and start working again at 4?

Kendodd · 27/09/2024 20:19

I think most three year old will be very tired after a full day at preschool and would sit quietly on the couch and watch TV or fall asleep.

florasl · 27/09/2024 20:17

DD1 would happily sit and watch a whole movie with a bit of colouring to do at 3. No chance for DD2.

crostini · 27/09/2024 20:14

Loads of three year old would do this. Obviously your husband should be near by and able to attend to him if needed though.

But you know your child best and wether he'd be engrossed enough to be chilled out or wether he'd be causing mayhem.

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 20:14

Avocadono · 27/09/2024 19:59

Neither of mine has ever been tired out by nursery or Reception in the way people on MN describe but equally (and I'm not trying to sound smug, I just don't know how else to say it) we've always had high expectations and don't let them run around/climb/jump inside in the same way many of our friends let their children. We expect them to entertain themselves quietly at times. Some of this has been made easier by their personalities but we've also put a lot of work into it.

He often will entertain himself, sometimes better than my friends kids but he doesn’t seem awfully good at playing - he just empties toys everywhere and I’ve tried a few ways of addressing it and never got very far. I’ve had to accept it’s ’him.’ But it does make a messy house if he’s left to his own devices entirely. He’s not too bad of someone’s around, that’s what I’ve found anyway. I don’t mean he’s running round screaming, he doesn’t do that, not often anyway!

OP posts:
FestiveNearly · 27/09/2024 20:13

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 19:28

Does no one else have a child who gets more energetic the more they do? Just wondering as it seems most children are so exhausted they’ve no energy at all after preschool but mines most hyper then!

Yep, I have one of those.

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 20:12

AutumnTimeForCosy24 · 27/09/2024 20:04

@shakemyheadatyou

How many times have you tried this?

what are your other options?

what's the house like when DH WFH without DS there?

im not convince the hour with DS amusing himself is the main issue here!

I think it’s just the general stress for me, as I have to

do his breakfast
make his lunch
pack bags with waterproofs etc

then come home and do dinner, the house is a tip, ds is in a daft mood as he’s been ignored and have I mentioned the house is a tip?!

OP posts:
shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 20:10

NatalieH2220 · 27/09/2024 19:58

My 3yo wouldn't have the attention span to sit and watch tv for that long so no. He'd then cause chaos instead.

I’m so relieved you said this, I was starting to stress ds was really behind! He isn’t into Disney films or anything like that yet.

OP posts:
Wonderlust233 · 27/09/2024 20:08

If DH can be in the same room as the 3yo then yes definitely. A bit of snack time, bit of telly and a bit of toys.

Wonderlust233 · 27/09/2024 20:08

DS1 would have easily done this age 2.5 if I am honest. He probably would have put the toys away and gotten himself a drink. He might have even emptied the dishwasher.

DS2 though... No chance. Not even age 5.

SunQueen24 · 27/09/2024 20:07

My second born (who is 3 now). Yes absolutely.

My first born. Not a hope in hell.

Baddaybigcloud · 27/09/2024 20:05

If he’s exhausted from a week at preschool and your husband can fix him a snack and sit next to him on the sofa with his laptop think it’ll mostly be fine?? Who doesn’t need a chill on a Friday afternoon!

AutumnTimeForCosy24 · 27/09/2024 20:04

@shakemyheadatyou

How many times have you tried this?

what are your other options?

what's the house like when DH WFH without DS there?

im not convince the hour with DS amusing himself is the main issue here!

Kittybluecat · 27/09/2024 20:03

For 1 hour? Once per week? Yes possibly mine would be able to do this. Try it.

Ozanj · 27/09/2024 20:01

DS could do this for 30-40mins from 2. TV on. We turned the wine fridge into his snack / milk fridge & he was fully potty trained so accidents weren’t an issue. But if your DH is wfh then why can’t he just work from downstairs for an hour or take his lunchbreak then?

Avocadono · 27/09/2024 19:59

shakemyheadatyou · 27/09/2024 19:28

Does no one else have a child who gets more energetic the more they do? Just wondering as it seems most children are so exhausted they’ve no energy at all after preschool but mines most hyper then!

Neither of mine has ever been tired out by nursery or Reception in the way people on MN describe but equally (and I'm not trying to sound smug, I just don't know how else to say it) we've always had high expectations and don't let them run around/climb/jump inside in the same way many of our friends let their children. We expect them to entertain themselves quietly at times. Some of this has been made easier by their personalities but we've also put a lot of work into it.

Completelyjo · 27/09/2024 19:58

My 3 year old could 100% sit with a snack and some toys or a bit of tv for an hour with DH working at the table, particularly after a busy day at nursery!

NatalieH2220 · 27/09/2024 19:58

My 3yo wouldn't have the attention span to sit and watch tv for that long so no. He'd then cause chaos instead.

PosiePetal · 27/09/2024 19:58

If your dh is in the same room as him, yes you ds could probably have a snack and watch TV for an hour.

MargaretThursday · 27/09/2024 19:57

Depends on the 3yo.

Dd1 would have been happy at the table colouring at that age for an hour. Give her a packet of raisins as well and she'd have been in heaven.
DD2 would have needed full on attention and if you'd turned your back for 5 seconds she'd have found her way into a full paint pot/sharp kitchen knives/the totally childproof lock on the cupboard/something else <take your pick>
Ds would not have wanted TV, but if you'd found him one of his favourite videos, either the one about Concorde Crash or the Bismark History Channel one, he'd have been silent and still for an hour. Yes, he had unusual tastes. He was explained one of them to me the other day - he's 17 now and still has similar tastes.

He did once want me desperately to come and take notes for a "craft activity" video he'd seen advertised. I came to find him about to start "how to make a nuclear submarine". He assured me that it was a small one, only 10m and he was sure the neighbours wouldn't mind.