To be ashamed that I used to look up to 'Supernanny'

I’ll get flamed for saying this.

My DD had immense tantrums. I contacted the school thinking she needed a SEND referral. I also watched Supernanny.

I followed her advice and DD vastly improved. She’s a teenager now, no problem getting her to school, friends, does her homework, exercises etc. She’s happy.

I was a mum to two young DCs around that time and I also followed some of her ‘advice’ - naughty step etc - and despaired at the kids.
I also know a lot more about childhood behaviours and my (now adult) children and wished I could’ve done things differently.
It’s shocking they made the kids misbehave more for the programme esp as it was the early days of ‘reality’. Now we’d be wiser.

I was once asked to appear in The Apprentice with my company for one of the tasks. We were approached by the BBC who had already chosen the venues the candidates were meant to be researching. We worked in corporate entertainment at one of the chosen venues and were contacted to see if we were available to offer a package in advance - which the candidates would then ‘research’ and discover having ‘researched’ and chosen their venue. I knew enough about TV to say no as they most certainly weren’t going to pick the good bits and show my company in a good light. And even with the tasks organised in advanced, the candidates manage to make a hash of things. It’s all for show.

Edited to say derail - sorry - but to agree with PP who say reality television is all staged.

I think the naughty corner/thinking step / time out is a dubious method. I raised my kids during the Supernanny heyday and some very controlling mothers I knew used that method in a way that was abusive as it was so over controlling

They are now.

To be fair to her, she put in the work and went back to school to properly study dog behavioural science and has changed her approach since. See her word below:

Many of my early training influences had a decidedly ‘pack theory’-type approach, so some of the earliest episodes were infused with more of that stuff than I am happy with today. And while I was never comfortable with what is now known as ‘traditional’ or compulsion-based training which relied on some level of pain, fear, or intimidation, I am very definitely a different dog trainer than I was back in those early days.

I'm genuinely curious, what does Victoria Stillwell regret? Her methods are based on positive reinforcement, rather than punishment, and so I thought that they seemed sound. Might be my ignorance though!

I thought she was ok, back in the day, didn't she just recommend basic techniques, very gentle discipline. To families that basically had none. What's wrong with that now?

I take what the TikToker is saying with a pinch of salt, how come they had SN involved in the first place if their kids were so good?

Ugh, that programme was so bloody mean!

I don’t think they were cruel, but often not necessarily effective. However, in some contexts, what is!?

And it is all well and good with the grumbles about ‘kids these days / ineffective parents’ but doesn’t this show that it’s not a new problem? Supernanny was twenty years ago!

It's was on at a time when TV loved that "experts give you a public telling off" vibe.

See also Trinny and Susanna and the dog women (Victoria, who has also since regretted her methods).

In truth, we now know how fake all TV is and was. So the subjects would have always been shown in the worst light, the 'cure' just mostly a manipulation of editing and the 'experts' just whoever could have blagged themselves the top spot in the show.

Many of her behaviour management techniques were really cruel as well.

I think most kids tend to play up more for their own parents to be honest. I can imagine the shock effect of someone else coming in and taking over would have most children complying.

I do think a lot of people forget that she offered an alternative method to smacking which was commonly used in the decades before the 2000s.

In fairness, kids who are acting out don’t tend to behave the same way in company, so it’s likely a way to ensure viewers see their behaviour on the level it would be behind closed doors.

Also 99% of the time the issue is the parents not the child.

In the episodes I watched she was kind and sensible, but when she put down a boundary she stuck to it. Which is what kids need.

She was also fully prepared to call out bad parent behaviour rather than being a wet lettuce too afraid to offend. There was an episode where she effectively proved to the parents that THEY were the problem, overreacting to their child’s fairly normal behaviour, and the entire episode was training THEM to behave better.

I don’t know what the producers told kids, but I don’t throw babies out with bathwater. Jo Frost is genuinely helpful for those who are struggling.

My kids find watching super nanny great fun, they love the naughty kids and parents and always appreciate my calm ways after an episode 🤣

She doesn’t have a speech impediment

Pair of fucking bullies those two

plus never liked supernanny either

Better that than being told you look like shit by Trinny and Susannah though

I still use this with my (adult) kids on the daily 😀

I still like her TBF
Not watched Supernanny in a long time so I’m sure some of her methods might seem a bit cringe now, but if more parents adopted a more disciplined approach than being complete wet wipes with their kids, there would probably be more disciplined kids in today’s society.
I seem to remember it was the parents that were the problem rather than the kids in most cases on Supernanny.

A friend of mine knew her very early on through journalism and apparently the producers interviewed a lot of nannies but settled on her as the rest were too gentle. That's what she said anyway.

@Celticliving i guess rightly or wrongly it was behaviours to showcase her methods being used ?