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Original poster

School bus driver refused to drop my daughter home

492 replies

Theherringbones · 26/09/2024 21:09

My year 9 daughter gets the school bus service home from school everyday. Its a private service for her school only and It’s about a 50 minute journey.

Tonight there is an unusual amount of traffic on the roads. The driver refused to drop my daughter at her (home) stop as it would take him too long to get there. He said he would drop her somewhere 15 minutes away and she would have to have someone pick her up. She was in tears in the phone to me. The usual 50 minute trip took him about 80 minutes.

The bus stop she was dropped at is a clear run to our home as it’s the back roads and there was no traffic on them. I know that it would have taken him an extra 15 minutes to drop her home, but it is his job!

I was stuck in the middle of the traffic in the opposite direction, trying to collect my other child and had to make all sorts of crazy arrangements with friends to get to her. Luckily I made it just in time.

I had words with him and he was completely rude, ignorant, aggressive and arrogant about it. He refused to give me his name and said it would have take him too long to take her home (it would have been an extra time for him) and there wasn’t another option.

How can a private bus service that is the only reason she can attend this school, refuse to drop her home? Am I being unreasonable or should he have dropped her home, no matter what?!

OP posts:
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7
Coruscations · 26/09/2024 22:40

redskydarknight · 26/09/2024 21:54

He didn't leave her in the middle of nowhere - he warned DD that he couldn't take her to her destination, asked her to call someone to pick her up and handed her over to OP. There was no leaving her anywhere.

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He didn't know there was necessarily going to be someone available to pick her up. OP says she made it just in time - does that mean he was about to disappear?

ATenShun · 26/09/2024 22:37

noworklifebalance · 26/09/2024 22:32

I am not sure how any of those points are relevant?
The child was on a school bus and was dropped off, without prior arrangement, a significant distance from home in the dark without a concrete plan on how she would reach home.

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As I said before, you will likely find the school bus has a specified route which does not actually include where the driver was picking up and dropping off from.

A now deceased friend ran a company running school buses to the outlying rural villages. By rights the children were expected to get to eg the local village as it was within reasonable walking distance. As an obligement he would run them to their homes. This is what it sounds more like here.

What may happen if the OP starts making too much noise, is that all the local kids will be expected to get lifted and dropped at one location. These are not actual taxies.

Coruscations · 26/09/2024 22:37

Tryingtokeepgoing · 26/09/2024 21:50

I imagine there’s a real chance a bus driver on a school,bus run can go over hours, as that won’t be the only driving they do in a day. They are possibly doing a morning run and then daytime work on other routes / services, or doing those in the day and then the home time run in the evening. By the end of the day the cumulative effect of delays could easily take someone over 10 hours. But I agree, there ought to be a contingency plan.

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If they are so close to the limit on their hours for the last run of the day that an extra 15 minutes will take them over, then they shouldn't be doing the run.

Original poster
Theherringbones · 26/09/2024 22:37

I’ll answer a few more questions:

I just checked and the walk from where he dropped her off to home is 2 hours and 12 minutes. There are no pavements and it’s through a wooded area with roads that have a 60 mph speed limit. So there is no way she could be expected to walk home.

Its an independent school

I pay for the bus service. Her stop is specified.

She is under care of the SEN Dept at school but undiagnosed as of yet.

I told my daughter on the phone that I most likely couldn’t be where he was dropping her off in time as I was in standstill traffic and had been for hours already and at the time had no idea when I would make it back and he needed to take her home.

The driver wouldn't speak to me on the phone.

I asked her to wait with friends for me if I didn’t make it in time.

The school phone lines were closed.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 26/09/2024 22:36

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

She isn't 9.

redskydarknight · 26/09/2024 22:36

MSLRT · 26/09/2024 22:30

And if she was abducted during the time she was alone that would be okay would it?

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She wasn't alone at any point

NewSchoolYearRevamp · 26/09/2024 22:34

armadillio · 26/09/2024 22:26

OP, you seem to be being purposely vague. From what I gather

  • your child is 14
  • there were other children on the bus
  • your child does not have diagnosed SEN

Why can’t you pick up and drop off your own child?

Are you paying for this bus service?

Edited

I don’t think she has been vague.

Op has said she pays for this service. It’s irrelevant why she can’t pick up and drop off her child as people are often in that situation. She mentions other children in a post.

Also why does a diagnosis matter? Any child could feel uncomfortable about this situation. A child with suspected SEN may find it more disturbing.

2k2j · 26/09/2024 22:33

ATenShun · 26/09/2024 22:25

There are thousands of 13 year olds walking home or taking public transport every day quite safely.

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Yes, on routes that they know.

Sharkless · 26/09/2024 22:33

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

Demonhunter · 26/09/2024 22:32

If it was a 15 min walk I'd say that was fair enough, but a 15 minute drive can be quite a distance walking wise, when you think how far you can drive in 15 mins. I do sometimes think people who drive everywhere can forget that. I think a grown adult would be quite miffed about it never mind a 13 yr old! It definitely deserves to be looked into.

LilBowWow · 26/09/2024 22:32

Everyone here would be up in arms if it happened to their kid. They’d be up in arms if their own bus took a detour then refused to take them where they were supposed to end up. It’s the MN way to try twist things so the Op is at fault and it’s fucking strange.

noworklifebalance · 26/09/2024 22:32

armadillio · 26/09/2024 22:26

OP, you seem to be being purposely vague. From what I gather

  • your child is 14
  • there were other children on the bus
  • your child does not have diagnosed SEN

Why can’t you pick up and drop off your own child?

Are you paying for this bus service?

Edited

I am not sure how any of those points are relevant?
The child was on a school bus and was dropped off, without prior arrangement, a significant distance from home in the dark without a concrete plan on how she would reach home.

Coruscations · 26/09/2024 22:31

jigglywigglyhungryhippo · 26/09/2024 21:21

If she was the only one- then YANBU

YABU If he had other kids- then I think what he did was sensible; he asked her to ring you. I don't get why your daughter would be in tears though unless she has anxiety/etc. He has to get all the kids home, and if he had to do a 15 min diversion for every child, he'd be working over his hours due to the traffic.

It can't be a diversion, though, can it? It must be his normal route.

MSLRT · 26/09/2024 22:30

jigglywigglyhungryhippo · 26/09/2024 21:21

If she was the only one- then YANBU

YABU If he had other kids- then I think what he did was sensible; he asked her to ring you. I don't get why your daughter would be in tears though unless she has anxiety/etc. He has to get all the kids home, and if he had to do a 15 min diversion for every child, he'd be working over his hours due to the traffic.

And if she was abducted during the time she was alone that would be okay would it?

Coruscations · 26/09/2024 22:30

Winteriscominginfast · 26/09/2024 21:16

He will be limited to the amount of hours he can drive in a day, and he may have been near his limit. That said he should have stayed with your daughter until she was collected.

If he was that close to his hours limit, the company should have sent another driver.

HotPotato123 · 26/09/2024 22:30

You are absolutely not being unreasonable, this is not ok.

ThisBlueCrab · 26/09/2024 22:28

This absolutely needs to be raised with the school. This is a massive breach of safeguarding protocols for any school.

You are absolutely right to be fuming.

To those talking drivers hours, no company leased out to schools will cut their drivers hours that close.

Ineffable23 · 26/09/2024 22:27

redskydarknight · 26/09/2024 21:52

Now OP has clarified this is a "late" bus and not an after school bus, it does sound like the bus driver was out of driving hours for the day. Not sure what else he could have done? He told DD to contact an adult to pick her up and an adult arrived in time, so DD was not left on her own in a strange place.

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But if that's the case the right thing to do would be to drop the child off and then stop driving and wait to be picked up and driven back to the depot yourself by another driver if that's such a reasonable thing to do. And if that's not a reasonable thing to do, why is it reasonable to cut the route short and leave a child in a random location when it isn't reasonable for the driver to be stuck in a random location?

Also the bus company should be arranging their driver's hours so that a minor (30 minute) delay doesn't cause them to run out of hours.

You don't see random buses stopping all over the country because the drivers ran out of hours because the bus companies plan the routes so that that doesn't happen.

KrisAkabusi · 26/09/2024 22:27

2k2j · 26/09/2024 22:22

Our country is such a joke. A parent can't go into their kids' school without a member of staff with them in case they are a paedo/predator of some kind. And yet it's OK to dump this kid on a random street - where she's probably lost, scared etc and there are any number of randoms on the streets. Shit behaviour from the driver and he knows it.

But he didn't do that. He handed her over to her mother.

noworklifebalance · 26/09/2024 22:26

Zanatdy · 26/09/2024 22:20

She’s year 9 not age 9. Unless i’m missing something is it that unreasonable in a situation like this she walks 15 mins? Presume she has a key

15min drive - you can cover quite some distance in 15minutes. My daughter would not be able to walk a 15 minute drive. Some roads may not be suitable for pedestrians and even more dangerous in the dark and rain

armadillio · 26/09/2024 22:26

OP, you seem to be being purposely vague. From what I gather

  • your child is 14
  • there were other children on the bus
  • your child does not have diagnosed SEN

Why can’t you pick up and drop off your own child?

Are you paying for this bus service?

redskydarknight · 26/09/2024 22:26

Differentstarts · 26/09/2024 22:19

But nobody has said he was over hours that's something you've created in your own head. Bus drivers take people to France and beyond yet you think he's run out of hours doing the school run. If say he had run out of hours that is not the passengers problem and he needs to ring his boss and arrange another driver

Show quote history

Actually I was going by what OP said the bus driver told her, not making something up. I suspect they could have sent a replacement but in the traffic as described, that could well have taken a long time and I think having any remaining children picked up by parents, rather than waiting about, was a much more preferable solution.

ATenShun · 26/09/2024 22:25

2k2j · 26/09/2024 22:22

Our country is such a joke. A parent can't go into their kids' school without a member of staff with them in case they are a paedo/predator of some kind. And yet it's OK to dump this kid on a random street - where she's probably lost, scared etc and there are any number of randoms on the streets. Shit behaviour from the driver and he knows it.

There are thousands of 13 year olds walking home or taking public transport every day quite safely.

NewSchoolYearRevamp · 26/09/2024 22:24

I think this was unacceptable of the driver. The fact he wouldn’t give his name makes me feel he knew that too. My DD is a similar age, no sen but has had mild anxiety at times. She would definitely have been upset and anxious about this situation.

Differentstarts · 26/09/2024 22:22

Zanatdy · 26/09/2024 22:20

She’s year 9 not age 9. Unless i’m missing something is it that unreasonable in a situation like this she walks 15 mins? Presume she has a key

15 minute drive not walk and what if she doesn't know the area she was dropped of at. I wouldn't be happy if I'd paid for a taxi and they dropped me 15 minutes drive from home it's a paid service