Aibu to just want a home for me and my dc!?

OP my last tenant lied to the letting agent, stating she was single, no dependents. When I met her to give her the keys she actually had two children. Not a lot I could do to be honest! Could you do the same? X

Good luck OP. Just keep taking small steps in the right direction and things will fall into place eventually.

@allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld your low rent is more mind blowing to me than OP's! £1300 is pretty average around here too. It's grim.

@chubbycake would rather not say the specific area but its a city and the average is £1300 a month. wow that is high rent! I only charge 460 for 2 beds with double glazing, central heating, new kitchen and garden!! scotland!

I just wanted to say well done for getting out of the relationship OP.

I did find moving out of the city things were much easier housing wise, I know you don't want to do that. Really hope you find something soon.

Very well said

We stayed over our leave notice. Would husband brother let yous stay until yous find somewhere? If you prove you're looking elsewhere. 100% go to council and explain everything we even got extra points for the kids disability. We got the 1st house that became available

I'm so sorry you're going through this OP - it really is hellish and I've experienced facing homelessness this year too. I'm lucky in that it's just me and my cat, and I absolutely would want someone like yourself with children to be prioritised by official bodies for housing. I'm also lucky that I had a friend who could help me with a deposit and first month's rent whi I approached as an absolute last resort when it became clear the council would rather see me actually homeless than housed with their help.

Mine's a long story of demise over 2.5 years after being suddenly widowed, so I won't bang on about it specifically but while I knew housing was a growing issue, like many situations until I was in the thick of it I didn't realise just how bad things are.

I have always thought that the system is so backwards when it comes to housing, especially when councils are involved. Stable living conditions give people the bedrock on which to build their lives. It seems utterly bonkers to me that some people and their families in financial difficulty already are pushed out of their homes into temporary sub standard accommodation that costs the council's far more money than either helping with the finances to stay where they are or putting them into somewhere decent to start with. The cynic in me suspects that there are dodgy connections between temporary accommodation providers and those who manage funding for them.

The whole process is so demoralising and dehumanising and I can only imagine how much worse it is for people with additional needs and vulnerabilities.

It costs more money to deal with the effects of homelessness and it makes me so angry when people think it's "entitled" to want secure housing in the communities they work in and where their children are educated. People are complaining all the time about "lack of resilience" across various demographics - I bet if you scratch the surface of why poor mental health is becoming endemic you'd find alot has rootlessness and insecurity due to precarious housing situations as a big part of the back story.

I really hope you find somewhere soon and that any agencies involved actually help you. Sending much love.

Can you look at 1 bed properties, DC share bedroom & have a sofa bed for you in sitting room? Not ideal but housed is better than homeless and if you can reduce the cost maybe you can get somewhere. Also - £1,300 @ month would cost you £15,600 a year out of your post tax income, on rent alone. That barely leaves after you take into account utilities, insurances, council tax, food, clothing, transport to work & school.

I got a housing association property but I was homeless and living in a refuge with DS.

Sorry OP, I know it's hard.

I'll be honest, me too. We've lived in this area for a long time, kids are settled and happy, I've got friends here and the whole reason we moved here was for the schools. DD is due to go to secondary school next year and is worried sick about ending up at a different school to all her friends. But, same as you, I'm struggling to find/be accepted for a rental property that I can afford. The market is just ridiculous and rents are insanely high. Oh, and STBXH has just announced he'll be aiming to 'give' me as little as he can get away with in the divorce, so my hopes of being able to eventually get a mortgage are dwindling.

We live in a lovely area and were very comfortable on our two incomes, so it is upsetting to think about ending up in a council house in god knows where, relying on Universal Credit to make ends meet. So I totally get where you're coming from, it's scary. But try to think longer term. It would just be a stepping stone in the right direction, which is away from your ex and towards a safe and happy future. Good luck

I went through this exactly until 6 months ago. Finding a Council house/HA in my area is simply impossible. Eventually managed to find a private rental but had to use a guarantor. However it might have got worse by now. I agree with PP about contacting the council again with the police reports etc.

I rang Women's Aid initially for advice about how to leave, and they suggested I approach the council. I literally called the main customer services number and they did an initial assessment with me over the phone, then a Housing Officer got in touch and did a more detailed assessment. I had to give supporting information from Women's Aid, which was essentially just a letter from them saying that I'd been receiving support, and then things like proof of address, birth certificates for my children etc. My income wasn't assessed at any point.

Their one stipulation was that they won't rehouse me in the immediate area I currently live in for safety reasons, but I'd reached a point where leaving him and having a safe and affordable home for me and the kids was more of a priority than staying where I am, as much as I love it here. I seem to be between positions 2-4 for all of the houses I've bid on so far, it's been about 2/3 months.

Hope that helps. It sounds like you could really benefit from giving Women's Aid a call and contacting the council and having your banding reassessed.

@chubbycake
Let the council know about the police reports. You'll be given higher priority for DV. Definitely also contact women's aid for support.

If you’re on Facebook - have you asked in the local Community type pages for rentals available?

Hi OP. I'm in a similar boat and it's really shitty so you have my sympathies.

I just wanted to say though that I approached my local council with my situation (with evidence from Women's Aid that I was experiencing domestic abuse) and they gave me quite a high priority banding. I haven't had to move or make myself intentionally homeless or go into temporary accommodation or anything like that. I just explained that I would struggle to manage the rent for our current home by myself after getting STBXH to leave. I'm still waiting for a property, and in the meantime just about managing to pay the rent here by myself.

Just thought I'd share in case it's any help to you to know that social housing could be a viable option after all.

@chubbycake what area are you in and how much is the average rent for a two bedroomed flat?