To think MIL is being unreasonable and there's nothing wrong with hand-me-downs?

From about 2 mths old my son was a full size bigger than his twin sister and she wore hand me down clothes for the first couple of years of her life, only really finishing because he was so hard on his clothes that they were only fit for the bin when he had finished with them.

Same here!

I'm excited to start putting DS in the lovely mustard yellow winter coat DD looked so cute in.

I bought a gender neutral sleep suit in newborn size and it was the first thing both my children (a son and then a daughter) wore. I treasure the photos of them wearing it.

The only downside is I can never get rid of it but I'll only be able to pass it down to one of them.

Most of my daughter's clothes are at least third hand my best friend buys for her daughter off vinted so at least second hand then my daughter ends up with it prefer I pass it on again.
I say it balances out my throw away nappies 😆
I think you should get most of their clothes off vinted and perhaps make a point of both getting a nice new coat etc.

I was lucky because DD has always been petite, and has always loved getting her BFF's outgrown clothes!

I also bought the occasional new item once she was old enough to have an opinion about what she wanted, so she could have a say. But she loved her BFF's mum's taste in clothes (far better than mine, apparently 😂)

Recently a close colleague's daughter went to uni and had a big wardrobe clear out, and gave me a huge bag of hardly worn clothes.

DD and BFF (now late teens) had a lovely time trying them on, and were very happy to get several new outfits each.

Once DS2 is old enough to notice let him occasionally choose a t-shirt or similar. But otherwise hand me downs make sense financially and environmentally

She's being ridiculous. At that age kids don't care. You buy him new stuff sometimes and making clothes last longer is a good thing. She'd be horrified by me and my brothers as my boys grow out of clothes it goes down to nephew number one then when he out grows to nephew number two - obviously anything torn, stained not fit for purpose is got rid of.

If MIL wants to spend her money on new clothes for youngest she can knock herself out but I wouldn't be happy with her trying to dictate how I spent my money.

My youngest can't wait to get hold of his older brothers coat in a year or 2! And loves wearing things he remembers brother wearing. Eldest had a lot of hand me downs from friends or cousins which then went on to youngest. Both get new things occasionally, and clothes get handed onto friends with younger ones. Love seeing clothes have lives elsewhere!

Round here the clothes just seem to circulate. It is madness to buy everything new, from both an environmental and financial point of view.

DS had a coat 4th hand. It went on to at least three other boys. Nothing wrong with that at all.

I read something the other day which said the planet has enough clothes for the next half century. We do not need to produce any more.

If they genuinely think you're being fair to DS2, tell them they can feel free to fund DS2's new wardrobe. If not, then they need to keep their opinions to themselves.

I have done this with my 2 sons who are 3 years apart. Anything not fit to be kept was binned. I kept shoes/trainers if still life in them. Came in handy if they needed a spare pair for pe.

as they got older there would be some items that the younger one didn’t like which was fine.

we did buy trainers new but sports direct so not expensive. As younger son got older he has more expensive shoes than his brother go mainly as he has had a lot of ah d me downs and never complains. He liked it as it meant a trip to the loft to “shop” and avoided actually going shopping!

once younger son grow out we have given to family or friends.

my daughters clothes go to my sil for my nieces who in turn passes them on after.

my daughter has got clothes from family/friends when she was younger and loved looking through the bags!

i would be happy if someone wanted to give me a bag of clothes too!

Your in laws are so behind the times. In the last week I have bought new jackets for my nephews (different families, parents know I am doing it and are happy as I'm not giving them plastic tat!) anyway in both coats there are sewn in labels with lines for three names to be put in. So they are clearly being produced with the intention of being handed on to at least two more children after the initial recipient. I remember from my school days gaberdine macs that were double breastfed with buttons and holes on both sides so could be worn by both boys and girls. They were usually navy blue or grey so again very clearly unisex. Your in laws clearly just want yo waste money and resources.

Everyone I know has done this OP. What is your MIL's problem?
Best to try and detach from the comments

I passed everything down through 3 kids and my youngest is a girl after 2 boys lol She loved getting (in particular) tshirt and pjs that were Star Wars themed from her brothers.

I'd make the most of it while your younger son isn't bothered by what he wears!

I agree with you 100%! MIL seems to be neither "old-fashioned thrifty" nor "environmentally conscious young".

I would suggest to her: well, how about we clothe DS1 and you clothe DS2? Except that, as you say, there is just no need at all to buy anything new to a three-year-old, who will not remember what he was wearing anyway.

No ptesents/outings?! Even weirder that she's got a derogatory opinion on hand me down clothes, then!

What's it to do with her? She don't like it, she can buy new stuff for the youngest. I'm all about second hand clothes, having slimmed out of my entire wardrobe. Couldn't care less about new stuff. At his age, ds2 has no idea.

Yanbu. Some of my second childa favourite stuff is stuff her bigger sibling has outgrown. She doesn't care whether it's new or previously been worn. She couldn't even tell. The other good thing is they have different tastes so she tends to like the things my eldest didn't like and hardly wore.

Your MIL is bonkers. My DS is an only but lived in hand me downs from a friend and my sister in law. Even now at 18 he still gets stuff from my friends DS!

I then passed stuff down to another friend and it then went onto her sister. Some of our stuff has been through 7 boys and still been ok to give to charity when the smallest one grew out of it!

Nicely worn stuff is more comfortable than new stuff. I don't get much to hand down between my 2 as older one has probably destroyed stuff before outgrowing. I have higher standards for passing on than allowing continued use

Have they literally nothing going on in their own lives? How can they remember who's wearing what and why would they give a 💩 🙄

We are similar with our two (4 & 2), our 2 year old will wear hand me downs that aren't stained or worn out. We could afford to buy new but we don't because its a massive waste and bad for the environment. The only thing we don't hand down are shoes. I also make a point to buy a couple new pieces for our 2 year old (a couple nice shirts, etc), and they will each get a new outfit for the holidays as well as a new pair of pjs + a new outfit as a Christmas gift (we give each child a new toy, something they need, something to wear and something to read each Christmas).

Nothing wrong with hand me downs and if your PIL have issue they can buy your little one a few new pieces.