To think MIL is being unreasonable and there's nothing wrong with hand-me-downs?

Crazy!!! Kids clothes are grown out of in no time, they're getting more expensive and it's really wasteful to only wear them once! I get all of ds clothes second hand and then just buy the odd bit if I want him to have something "good" or if I've not been able to find something specific second hand. It also means I don't stress about him getting dirty or getting paint etc on his clothes when he's playing or at nursery because they aren't brand new.

This.

I an fine financially but buy my clothing from Vinted & charity shops for environmental reasons. Tell her you are trying to save what is left of the planet.

I'm due my 2nd daughter in a few weeks. I intend to reuse everything. Doesn't mean she won't get some new stuff, but mostly hand me downs. We buy most of our stuff from charity shops or vinted anyway. Fast fashion and child slavery in fashion is no joke!

This is nothing new. I wore my sister’s hand me downs growing up and I am 63. It did get boring when Gran bought two identical dresses in slightly too big sizes for sis & me. Sis wore hers for 2 years - I had the same outfit for 4.
It stops soon enough as kids catch each other up, or one stops growing. But makes total sense otherwise .

That’s really curious. Is she on a really low amount of income or something?

You could buy vinted for the oldest too. Then, as their tastes change, don't keep older child's clothes- resell and buy second hand for second child.

Lots of ways to do it. I try to avoid buying new.

I was the youngest. I certainly inherited some clothes from my sister but I did get some new stuff too. My older sister sometimes got stuff from our older cousin so it wasn't just me. I think that if the clothes are in a decent state and not miles too big then just carry on as you are.

Completely unreasonable. Attitudes like hers are one of the reasons the planets in the mess it is.

What sort of upbringing did your mil have. My mum grew up very very poor during the 40s. I mean hungry, city centre slum poor. Everything she had was a hand me down, even underwear.
She was very funny about me having it. When I was born mum and dad were living in a bed sit she was 29 so not star struck teenagers but dad's business wasn't great neither had much education and dad had a life limiting health condition. He told me after she died that when I was born his brought home some second hand clothes (he was a green grocer) that his customers gave him, she burst out crying as she didn't want me to experience the shame she did in wearing hand me downs.

Your inlaws are what is wrong with society. "New" doesn't have to be brand new.

Your 3 year old won't even remember it belonged to his older sibling, and even if he does when he's younger, he won't care. I have 5 years between my boys, DS2 is 8, and I just give him a box of "new" clothes and tell him they belonged to DS1. He loves it! Picks the ones he likes then I give the rest to charity, and if he needs a few more things I buy him a second hand bundle on vinted or eBay.

Society needs to move away from the idea that fashion should be disposable!

Yanbu as long as the things are good condition and there's no second hand shoes.

My kids LOVED hand me downs. It was actually bizarre, they treated them like gifts - you've given me your old pyjamas, THANK YOU. Anyone can have shop bought clothes but something that someone else loved first - much better. 😃

YANBU at all. My eldest wore hand me downs where available, my youngest wears his brothers stuff when appropriate - even now they're tweens.

I do buy some stuff just for the youngest obviously, since things wear out, he's an entirely different shape, and has completely different tastes to his older brother - but for stuff that passes down OK (coats, some joggers an t-shirts etc) why on earth would I buy new when there's perfectly fine used.

youngest doesn't care, as long as I don't make him go shopping TBH.

MIL is BU, I have 2 DDs and saved everything too. Youngest is 9 now so does get to choose some new stuff, but at 3 I definitely wouldn't have bought her new stuff unless she needed it.
I also bought a lot of stuff second hand for eldest DD too

Gosh she sounds like a snob. My kids liked wearing other peoples hand me downs and got quite excited if a lucky dip bag of clothes arrived for them. They could recount who gave what and friends LOVED seeing people wearing their kids old clothes. We pass small stuff on too. Environmental and cost effective.

YANBU...My son had his sister's old rompers, even her pink ones. I also deliberately bought matching dungarees in neutral colours so they could match as babies and then, when he was bigger, he got her old dungarees sets.

When he overtook her in size, she got his hand me downs such as t shirts, joggers, coats, wellies etc. They're teens now and she still gets some of his hand me downs but now it's the branded stuff. She's currently wearing his year 7 school shirts and jumpers.

They both get new stuff but it's ridiculous to spend money when you don't have to.

Stupid woman. DD lives almost entirely in DS's hand me downs. I rarely buy new for either kids.

My DM always insists on buying new stuff for my younger DD (as well as elder DD) as she always felt she was treated second best to her sisters and doesn't want DD to feel like that. But that's her money.

DDs frequently swap clothes now they are similar sizes! Its gets handed down to a cousin after them

Is your MIL a youngest sibling/cousin? I completely understand the logic of sharing clothes, but I'm the youngest and I remember disliking that my clothes weren't really me, and were worn out so I felt scruffy.
I would probably reuse some clothes but I would always make sure they were in near perfect condition and get every child some new clothes that were picked with them in mind.

The price of baby and kids clothes atm is crazy, I don't blame you for doing this. What's the point of wasting money on clothes they wear for a few months especially winter coats.
YADNBU

DS and DD are 2 years apart, and we do hand me downs! Joggers, tops, trainers, pjs, wellies etc. DD gets some dresses and other things that are new (or new to her). She loves mining his drawers for new clothes, sometimes before he's ready to pass them on!

They're being absolutely ridiculous, it would be environmentally hideous not to reuse stuff! Sure, maybe as the little one gets older it might be nice to treat him to the odd Brand New Nice Thing of his own. My kid just inherited a lovely and originally expensive coat that went from one friend's daughter, to another friend's 3 daughters in succession, to mine! We are both delighted with it.

I’ve got a 2 year age gap. Kept most things from DS. DD doesn’t care that she’s wearing dinosaurs. She still gets new stuff