MIL and her emotional support dog

Why is it petty for her not to want a dog in her house when she is allergic to dogs?
edit: just saw your latest comment. So you can say no to a dog because of its behaviour, but op can’t say no because the dog will give her a physical reaction that could severely impact her health? What a silly hypocrite!

The mil is at fault. The op is allergic to dogs! Insisting on taking your dog to someone’s house when they are allergic is extremely cunty. It’s very simple to see who is at fault for sure in this situation.

Being allergic to dogs , I antihistamines doing absolutely nothing to help, I completely understand OP. I'm so glad your husband is on your side.

Therapy dogs are sonethkng different. They are usually dogs who go into schools, care homes etc for therapeutic benefit.

Assistance dogs are guide dogs, hearing dogs and dogs trained to mitigate other disabilities.

Emotional Support Dogs have no legal status in the U.K. they are pets.

In public places, they do not have to be allowed in private homes.

People are having to say allergies even if they do not have one, due to not wanting to be in a dog workplace or have it come to their house. That’s a shame as allergies are a serious matter. It should be default not to ask or bring them places. It is awkward to say no to friends or family without a valid ‘reason’. When the reason actually is, it’s a smelly/ratty/annoying animal and all they do when it’s there is talk about it or comment on what it is doing.

So does she never go out without the dog? What kind of life does she have if she can’t go to coffee or to a restaurant or shopping where dogs are not allowed? She is being grossly unreasonable and you are absolutely right, you are Lord of your own Manor and absolutely within your rights to refuse entry to a dog that exacerbates your allergies and creates mess! Good for you for cancelling the Christmas get-together

with allergies this should never even be a question.

Therapy dogs are - and hearing and guide dogs.

ESAs are just pets and are only trained to the extent that a pet would be.

Even if the OP wasn't allergic and just didn't want the dog in her house because she doesn't like dogs, that would still be her prerogative and she'd be in the right to say no to the dog!

Pets are the personal choice of the people who buy them - no one else has to accommodate them or even tolerate them in their own homes. If a person doesn't want a stinky, moulting, yappy pooch in their house,then fair enough. The only person who should inconvenienced by a pet, is the person who owns it!

Dogs are not children - there's no entitlement to bring them into restaurants and shops or into other peoples houses (not even sure about kids in that last context tbh 😉).

Firstly, antihistamines are not a golden bullet. Even the mega strong prescribed ones don’t work for me around long-haired cats and I am ILL if I’m in the same house as one. That alone is enough reason for the op to not allow the dog in her home. Secondly, dogs are not children. They are not entitled to go everywhere just because the owner says so and certainly not into someone else’s home! Thirdly, she’s not stopping her son from seeing his mother at all or her grandkids from seeing their grandmother.Indeed, she wasn’t stopping her mil from coming into the home, only the dog. MIL needs to accept that the dog is not in fact an extra appendage. This is ALL on the incredibly selfish, entitled mil. It’s just an added bonus for the op that she was sick of being expected to host Christmas for everyone every other year and now doesn’t have to!

Antihistamines aren't a magic bullet. Last time I visited a family member who had a cat I took an Antihistamine before arrival but still broke out in hives and sneezed so much that I pulled muscles in my chest meaning I couldn't lie down comfortably for weeks after.

As have I, yet I don’t see how OP hates her MIL because she rightly doesn’t want the thing she is highly allergic to in her home nor wants to tolerate a person who wants to knowingly put her life at risk and override what is allowed in her home.

MIL can leave the dog at home and chooses not to. OP didn’t choose to be severely allergic to dogs and cannot have a dog in her home or go to MIL’s home where the dog is.

MIL doesn’t like OP because if she did, she wouldn’t be trying to bring her dog in the first place and telling her to just take antihistamine. Even if you don’t like someone, a decent, sane, person wouldn’t try to hurt them on purpose which is what MIL was doing by trying to undermine OP and her son by bringing the dog to their home.

You'll often find me on here sticking up for MILs.

Bringing or wanting to bring a known allergen to an allergic person's house and not taking no for an answer is justifiable reason to dislike someone.

Expecting to inherit from her son over his wife doesn't imply she's an otherwise reasonable MIL either.

@phoenixrosehere Because I’ve read the whole thread. 🤷🏼‍♀️ OP hates MIL. The end. If the dog died, OP would still be looking for ways to hate the MIL.

Support dogs should be trained but no amount of training will stop OPs allergies.

@Gymnopedie You are comparing a dog who bites (and occasionally pisses on beds) to a dog who doesn’t seem to do those things? Unless there’s a massive backstory. Gosh antihistamines! It’s one day!!!!! Had a rescue kitty and took one every, single, god damn day! 💪🏼MIL will be dead one day, along with her dog. There’s NO way DH would stop me having DM to our home.

I have an 8 year old, so yeah bitey bastard can’t come here.

It’s a MIL and Dog bashing post. You’ll be a MIL one day OP. 😕🤣That’s all I’m going to say, I hope you’re treated with a little less contempt - well actually I don’t lol.

I thought all these support dogs were trained? Obviously not.

If not, then, no don’t let it in your home. I wouldn’t want some smelly, out of control dog in my home either. 🤷‍♀️

@RickyGervaislovesdogs

Hypocrite much? You won't have your MIL's dog in your house because he bites, but an OP with a severe allergy is in the wrong?

And good for you for seeing your MIL still. OP might see hers if MIL and dog didn't always come as a package deal wherever they were.

So you want to punish OP by hoping she spends Christmas on her own while her DH proves that his priority is his mum?

My mil hated ddogs and we had one. Caught her in several occasions locking the poor thing outside.. Wish we had locked that old bat out....

Are you for real?

It's petty for someone with both a dog allergy and phobia to not want someone to bring a dog into their home?

Well done OP, your MIL sounds like a nasty, self-centered arsehole.

OP is not stopping her husband or her kids going to see his mother. She has literally said that they can contact MIL and vice versa and she is not going to be involved either way.

You and other posters sure are going out of their way to ignore OP’s severe dog allergy.

Please tell us he declined?!?

You have allergies so of course YANBU to not want a dog round. The only thing you shouldn’t of done was tell everyone in the group chat it’s cancelled you should of got your DH to let them know just to prove he won’t override you and bow down to his mum