What is a reasonable consequence for this behaviour?

Cold weather doesn't cause illness - viruses do.

A consequence would have been getting cold from not wearing her coat.

She's just little and tired & cranky from school.

Punishing her after the fact would be ridiculous.

Being cold for a short period doesn't make you ill. You get ill, mostly, from infections. From contact with other people. Being chilly on the way home won't make her sick.

I would take something small away, so a teddy (not her favourite) or pudding. Explain that you won't have that again, and then, if she tries it again, you can remind her that she lost something last time and will lose it again if she continues.

Ffs sorry...
Have a chat about what big feelings she must have been experiencing to have got so upset and think about how else you could all manage that.

She doesn't need a consequence she's learning how to regulate and manage being upset/sad/hot/tired and expressing that through her behaviour.

Nowhere, nowhere has the OP said she wants to "punish" her DD 🙄 she asked for suggestions for the "reasonable consequences" for DD's behaviour.

Personally I think her own suggestion that DD says sorry to her dad for shouting and screaming is perfectly fine.

Another one for pick your battles.

Nothing bad is going to happen if DD doesn't wear their jumper or coat. And your DP probably would have found that part-way home, DD would have realised she was cold and put it on.

Also, don't forget that outbursts are normal after school for many children. It's called 'restraint collapse' and is the result of being on their best behaviour all day.

This. If she's calm have a chat about what big feelings she m

It’s relevant because, sometimes, children like to know exactly what arrangements are made. If she was expecting mum and dad arrived, she might have been surprised/confused/upset.

There’s also no need to be so rude.

Consequences are natural results, eg you don’t wear your coat, you’re cold.

When you say “she needs a consequence” you mean that she needs a punishment but you’re using the word consequence to make it sound as though it isn’t one.

Yeah, you can be sure.

You would withhold affection - way to go with screwing up a child and making them fee guilty for having emotions.

yes she reacted badly, yes talking to her and getting her to understand why she shouldn’t and why it happened is important

punishing and withholding affection isn’t going to get her emotional responses under control is it

Are you ok? I am seriously worried about people like you.

Sure

Right, let's assume the OP and her husband are normal people, not criminals.

Wtf is wrong with telling a 5 year old that she has to do as her parents tell her???

It cannot be a controversial approach, surely?

I work with small children and in 25 years I have never seen any child that age laugh at another child or friend when they have tantrums. They are usually concerned and wants to know why xx is sad or upset!

I'd be trying to ask her why she didn't want to jacket on and trying to chat to her about it.

But she said no? No is a full sentence, or is that just on MN.

Yeah, the it's important you do as daddy tells you as he is the grown up is a winner to teach children. 😂

I'd be trying to ask her why she didn't want to jacket on and trying to chat to her about it.
Some kids find the school day hard going and when they get out they need to decompress. Further demands on them might break the camel's back as such.
My son didn't wear a coat for 2 solid years no matter what the weather. He's still very inflexible about it. He does run very hot and would be pumping sweat at a walking pace when I would not be sweating at all.
Part of it is also autonomy and wanting to make decisions for themselves.
I'd be more focused on why she wouldn't do it rather than punishment.

kids are perfectly capable of knowing if they are hot or cold. let them decide. what do you care if they have their jacket on?

No consequence (punishment) needed. Just a brief chat about expected behaviour. Then draw a line under it. She's probably exhausted after being in school for 6 weeks. TBH I wouldn't have insisted she wear a jacket. Let her put the jacket on when she feels cold.

Checking you know that kids don’t get sick from being cold…

I think at that age the consequences needs to happen then and there, not afterwards as they won't link the behaviour to the consequence otherwise.

In the this case, the punishment/consequence was that dad put her jacket on her anyway even though she didn't want to so I consider that done and dusted now.

I personally would have just let her go without and the consequences would have been that she potentially got cold and then put the jacket on. Personally putting a coat on isn't something I want to battle about unless its extremely cold so would have just left it off and opted for the natural consequence.

That’ll sort her out 😂

This with bells on! Unless it’s pissing it down or below 0, the coat fight is not the hill to die on. Likewise unless she intentionally hits/kicks you regularly in anger, a short (2 sentence) conversation when she’s calmed down is fine. It’s also now way too far in the past in her brain for a consequence to be meaningful.

No consequence needed IMO.

Next time, just let her get cold and then she will ask for the coat. Or not, and she'll be cold. It won't do her any lasting damage!