To think people shouldn't have sex with people unless you would both be happy and able to raise children together?

There is no contraceptive they can take yet.

@Abbylikeswine "

"No one has "Anne had an abortion. Great!"."

I have said the equivalent of "Anne has had an abortion-thank f for that!"

And an abortion is not always a "very sad thing."

So are you saying OP that the only sex you've had in life is TTC sex? Or are you a virgin?

Why don't men take more contraception??

Neither "forced births" or abortions are pleasant things to think about are they.

No one has "Anne had an abortion. Great!".

They are both very sad things.

It's sad that all of these awful, sad riaky things happen to women.

Men have not much reproductive risk at all from sex. Another unfairness

I think the casual way some people bring children into the world is far more unspeakable tbh

One of my friends who was using Contraception, got pregnant not long ago.

Thet have never said that Contraception 100% prevents pregnancy

I completely agree, as if taking an innocent life is the easiest thing in the world.

Agree. Reproductive slavery is unspeakably vile.

Also, I slept with my bf at 17. He'd have made a good Dad, his parents definitely would have made him step up, and I loved him. So if you'd said "do you love him enough that in the worse case scenario (pregnancy with abortion unavailable) you could raise a child together? I'd have said yes.

But I may also have said yes with a guy who appeared that good, but only because he'd never been married with kids before, only because I'd never seen his temper before, only because we'd never been trapped in a sleepless hell of newborn babies, only because we'd never tried raising a medically complex child together.

Of course the threat of having to be with someone forever if I had sex with them would have put me off some guys but it wouldn't have put my sister off her physically abusive husband, because he wasn't then. He was the perfect guy!!

Do you want people locked into relationships forever because they can't be seen to be wrong?

And people have had sex with inappropriate people for as long as we've been people. And no doubt before that.

Of course I don’t WANT an abortion. I am extremely responsible with my contraception in the hope I never have to. But I think having a child I don’t want is WAY worse and I am fairly depressed that you think it’s better to bring an unwanted child into the world who I have tried my very hardest to avoid and be a shit parent than to have a very early abortion. I am glad I don’t live in 1930 so that my only option to have sex is not linked to having to marry a man and that I cannot live the life I want.

Sex is not just for procreation you know?

So should people who don't want kids never have sex?

Marvellous things called contraception are available.

@Alectoishome "Something about the casual references to abortions (plural!) turns my stomach. Just another form of contraption. Because casual sex without responsibility is fun.
Genuinely revolted"

Personally, I am genuinely revolted at the idea of forced birth.

Something about the casual references to abortions (plural!) turns my stomach. Just another form of contraption. Because casual sex without responsibility is fun.
Genuinely revolted.

Using contraception correctly can still fail as can the morning after pill

What is the driver in your opinion? Teenage hormones are all over the place, can be going wild. Sex drives are high at this age for evolutionary reasons.

That sounds like an attempt to control other people’s lives. How would that even happen? Some people have a stronger sex drive than others. Eg teenagers, who have sex at 14 (which is too young) and those, who don’t start until well in their 20s.

@Allfur "Yet even in those circumstances, oh patronising one, it can still fail"

Not sure what your point is.

I will tell my daughter that the most important decision she will ever make is the father of her children.
I'll also tell both my children that sexual attraction and intimacy is essential for a happy fulfilling long term relationship.
A life with crap sex or no attraction isn't something I'd want for either of my kids.

Yet even in those circumstances, oh patronising one, it can still fail

But it’s not is it? We carefully use contraception. If it was to fail abortion is available and we are ok with it. So therefore my risk of having a baby is zero. Yes if you use the withdrawal method and don’t feel you could have an abortion, it is a risk. But that isn’t true for most who absolutely don’t want children.

Just reading the thread about the mother's of disabled children they have really struggled to cope with and no mention of fathers

They chose to have children though. Obviously it’s not right that the father hadn’t stepped up. But the mother chose to have a child and whatever that brings with it. She could equally have chosen to have sex and not have a child. Women don’t have to be prepared to have a child with every man they shag - they have a choice.