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Original poster

Baby shower guests

92 replies

dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:17

My sisters planning my baby shower and has asked me who I'd like to invite.

My fiancés friend has had a girlfriend now for almost a year. I've met her a handful of times and not the biggest fan. Every time I've seen her she's never asked how I am, and I always find it difficult to make conversation with her. I feel a bit pressured to invite her as my best friend invited the friends girlfriend to hers.

What would you do?

OP posts:
Sunshineandpool · 24/09/2024 06:29

Lanzarotelady · 24/09/2024 06:25

Yes it is about gifts, no matter how you dress it up, its about gifts.

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It's not just about gifts that is a very small part of it. But I loved buying gifts for my close friends for their babyshowers. Because they're my friends and I like them! I would have bought them a gift if there was a baby shower or not.

Gimmeabreak2025 · 24/09/2024 06:28

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And you are so classy…. 🙄

Sunshineandpool · 24/09/2024 06:26

Mumsnet is full of killjoys so just ignore the boring naysayers.

A baby shower is a pretty intimate celebration. So I only invited my closest friends/family. I'd not invite her and if anything was said just say you were keeping it small.

Lanzarotelady · 24/09/2024 06:25

dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:34

It's not about gifts to me, it's about spending time with all my loved ones to celebrate baby and having a nice time Smile

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Yes it is about gifts, no matter how you dress it up, its about gifts.

PortiasBiscuit · 24/09/2024 06:24

Oh God, you’ve just reminded me that my niece is pregnant (again) … so another excruciatingly awful baby shower.

Lanzarotelady · 24/09/2024 06:19

dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:34

It's not about gifts to me, it's about spending time with all my loved ones to celebrate baby and having a nice time Smile

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No it isn't, its tacky and grabby, look at me I am pregnant.

Just say no, I don't want one, problem solved.

NQOCDarling · 24/09/2024 04:23

PolePrince55 · 23/09/2024 23:28

I won't be having a baby shower or gender reveal. 🤮🤮🤮

Thank you on behalf of all like-minded people!

NQOCDarling · 24/09/2024 04:22

dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:17

My sisters planning my baby shower and has asked me who I'd like to invite.

My fiancés friend has had a girlfriend now for almost a year. I've met her a handful of times and not the biggest fan. Every time I've seen her she's never asked how I am, and I always find it difficult to make conversation with her. I feel a bit pressured to invite her as my best friend invited the friends girlfriend to hers.

What would you do?

Don't have the baby shower. Then you don't need to worry.
They are a naff American import anyway

Daschund · 24/09/2024 04:20

I thought they were supposed to be a surprise? If so its easy to get away with not inviting her.

spackleplumb · 24/09/2024 00:51

I never had one but I have been to lots and they're lovely celebrations. As you've said OP they're usually more about being showered with love and happiness of a new baby on the way, even if the name originally was about being showered with gifts. I wouldn't invite her if you aren't friends with her yourself. And I wouldn't feel guilty for that. This is your experience and your joy so share it only with the ones who matter most to you. Congratulations Flowers

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 24/09/2024 00:43

KitsyWitsy · 23/09/2024 23:32

I think baby showers are lovely. Nice to make a fuss of a mum to be. I hope you enjoy it OP.

I agree x

RosaStar · 24/09/2024 00:08

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Not what she asked. Your comment was tacky ‘I’m so superior for not having one’. Loser

FeedingThem · 24/09/2024 00:06

Don't invite her. It's weird to think you need to invite the partner of anyone your partner is friends with. Your best friends relationship is separate to the situation.

Screamingabdabz · 23/09/2024 23:51

Are they actually still a thing?

cheeeesey · 23/09/2024 23:49

"It's not about gifts to me, it's about spending time with all my loved ones to celebrate baby and having a nice time"

Right. Apart from the "shower" bit which means everyone feels obliged to bring gifts even if you claim not to want them.

PinkyFlamingo · 23/09/2024 23:46

You say you feel pressured to invite her, who is doing that?

DillDanding · 23/09/2024 23:40

Don’t invite her. The vast majority of people loathe baby showers, so she’d more than likely be happy to be excluded.

Babycatsmummy · 23/09/2024 23:36

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My partner organised a surprise baby shower for me, helped by my best friend and it was lovely. Definitely not "tacky" at all being surrounded by friends and family celebrating my first baby was a sentimental experience

Lazzylegs · 23/09/2024 23:35

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Or the ones saying don't have a baby shower they are tacky. As if that's what the OP asked. So no mine isn't a dickhead response at all, I wouldn't answer a completely different question to what the OP asked because I'm not a dickhead.

NewName24 · 23/09/2024 23:35

Pandasnacks · 23/09/2024 23:21

I don't get it, what does your best friend inviting the guys girlfriend to her house, have to do with the guest list for the baby shower your sister is organising for you? She's not a friend, and most people don't like baby showers anyway so just don't invite her.

This (whatever the detail of the sister / friend).

Whatever you are hosting, you invite people you like and are close to. It is irrelevant who has been invited to a completely separate 'do' by someone else.

Original poster
dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:35

KitsyWitsy · 23/09/2024 23:32

I think baby showers are lovely. Nice to make a fuss of a mum to be. I hope you enjoy it OP.

Thank you. First baby so I am looking forward 🥰

OP posts:
Normandy144 · 23/09/2024 23:34

Don't invite her. Just keep it to close friends and family and keep it intimate.

Original poster
dec20 · 23/09/2024 23:34

cheeeesey · 23/09/2024 23:33

Why would you invite her to shower you with gifts when you don't even like her? Confused

It's not about gifts to me, it's about spending time with all my loved ones to celebrate baby and having a nice time Smile

OP posts:
cheeeesey · 23/09/2024 23:33

Why would you invite her to shower you with gifts when you don't even like her? Confused

PolePrince55 · 23/09/2024 23:32

@dec20
What would make you feel worse, inviting her or not inviting her!
It's your baby shower, I'm done with people pleasing. Don't get you anywhere & is not appreciated.
Just do what makes you happy x

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