Having I fucked up the sex talk?

I had that Usborne book - it was bizarre! I remember a line about the woman knowing she was pregnant because her womb had 'kept its special lining'.

So many outdated views on here.

For years the advice and thinking has been to have open, honest, factual conversations and answer questions using accurate terms as soon as children start asking questions.

Your answer was completely age appropriate OP. Please ignore posters saying that your child may tell others at school. They will be telling them accurate and correct information if they do!

Also by being factual and avoiding euphemisms and answering in a straightforward manner, they are much more likely to come to you as teenagers with issues that require a parent’s guidance.

Much better than them being misinformed, or feeling embarrassed to talk to you about sex, relationships etc.

By avoiding and delaying these topics, children may feel judged or embarrassed or feel these topics are taboo. In which case people are setting themselves up for children who do not come to them when they need support and advice later on.

Don't be daft.

My mother was a dog breeder and, when I asked how babies were made, she said it was just the same as with the dogs. I'd been present at many puppy births, and had often seen dogs mate. In case anyone doesn't know, the male dog's penis has bulb-like structures which swell after the initial humping, and cause the penis to be stuck inside the vagina to ensure good transfer of semen. This is called being "tied" and the dogs stand stuck together back-to-back like that for a good while. At primary school I had an enthralled group keen to hear how babies are really made. I explained confidently that, after the first part of sex, the couple are then tied together for a while and can't come apart even if they want to.

Up in arms about what exactly, though ?

Now the OP has answered these questions factually, it can lead onto other conversations about consent, contraception, respect, periods, etc, etc. in an age appropriate way. It can only be a good thing.

You told them the facts in an age appropriate way. Definitely the right way to do it. We need to normalise this stuff so it's not taboo or secretive.

You did the right thing. I am 69 (horrors!) and my mother never really explained anything, including periods. I had to rely on my older sister (7 years older), so I got a shock aged 13! Children need to know about bodily functions of all kinds in an age appropriate way. Thank god things have moved on.
‘special cuddles’ is a bit weird!

You did the right thing OP. An open, honest and age appropriate explanation. My useless DH led DD to believe that we had found her in a cabbage patch after being dropped off by a stork.. 🤦‍♀️

Just did. That is a great poem. Spot on. Thank you

When my 4 year asked if eggs came out of a chicken's bum my DH told her they have a vent an 'egg hatch'. Fast forward a few weeks and she asked a very pregnant lady in her playground 'how her baby was coming out' the flustered lady said, 'she wasn't sure yet'. My daughter told 'It's not your bum, my Daddy said you have an egg hatch'. Awkward queue for the ice creams that day.

I was given this book in the 70s at around age 5. It's very clear on what actually happens and OP it's a great age to tell them. As you've found they'll just be very matter of fact about it and take it all in their stride.

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/404921375247?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=5m5vfw8sscq&sssrc=4429486&ssuid=YWJXhRePQOu&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY

Any time any of my kids have asked me anything about human reproduction I've answered them in simple medically accurate terms. So they knew about the penis going in the vagina as soon as they asked about that which may have even been earlier than 6yo.
Kids are still innocent.. you don't rob them of innocence by giving them accurate info about their bodies. You just don't allow them to live in fear and confusion and with a sense of lingering shame. It also protects them from sexual exploitation if they actually understand what that is, and they have the confidence abd knowledge to talk about these things.
I firmly believe that if a kid asks you something you should answer as honestly as you can. I think it's confusing and stressful for them if you don't. You might think you are protecting them but in reality it becomes more scary and confusing in their mind. Because if they've asked you these questions they were already thinking about this. So consider what you are teaching them by refusing to answer or seeming disgusted or shocked.. or acting all hush hush. What does that convey about their body and their relationship to you?
I want my kids to be able to trust me enough to be able to come to me with any question or problem they might have.
I also want them to feel confident and in control of their own bodies.

I fully support a factual approach. If they are old enough to ask the question then they are old enough for the answer (in general) is my stance. I now have a 15, 13, 10 year old who are very open and will not be embarrassed to ask questions or have open discussions about relationships, bodies, sex etc

The word seed could help them to understand it more easily. Most kids would know that things can grow from seeds.

I can imagine! At least he, like a whole generation of American kids, didn’t learn what it was from the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal. I was eleven and at first I thought oral sex was just talking about sex.

Yeah, that’s what we did. We told our then-three-year-old that a mother has an egg cell and a father has a sperm cell and they put them together to make a baby. About a year later, she wanted to know how the egg and sperm cells got together, so we said the father puts his private parts into the mother’s private parts, and then the sperm cell comes out and goes to the egg cell.

My parents read Mummy Laid an Egg to me. I was too busy being fascinated by all of the doodles showing ways mummies and daddies could fit together (in the air suspended by balloons, I think was one of them?!) to be traumatised by the truth.

You did exactly the right thing, Op.

Told DD the same. She thought it was hilarious though and told daddy the really funny joke I’d told her when he got in from work 🙄

I do. Please do explain the ill effects on boys of getting the reproductive talk wrong

DH said I should have said that people have a special cuddle.

Oh God, I don’t think I could say that and still respect myself.

The Body Book by Claire Rayner worked for us, DD (a scientist now, 20 years later) spotted it aged 5 in a bookshop. Covers everything about bodies in a sensible way that doesn't cause nightmares.

The mistake your DH is making is in assuming that in telling your children the biological facts, they will view that information through an adults lense.

They will have no sense of the ‘adult’ nature of sex. All they have heard is a factual description that to a make a baby. ‘this goes there’. And that will be that!

I had a similar conversation with my children…they asked, I explained and then they moved onto something else.

When they are older and the hormones kick in, our conversation will turn to the other aspects of sex for enjoyment in a loving relationship… with a big focus on the need for consent and use of contraception!! For now, they asked, I answered and it’s not been mentioned again!!

Do you have a DS? Getting the reproduction discussion wrong with a boy doesn't have minimal ill effects.

Literally that - minimal ill effects of telling a boy that babies are delivered by Amazon but getting the reproduction discussion wrong with a girl and not understating why she is asking could be catastrophic from a safeguarding point of view.

Do you have a DD?

When I was 7 I asked my mum where babies come from and she said it’s when a man and woman love each other it happens. Well I loved Gary who was in 2nd year juniors, and I got very worried I was pregnant!

Nothing wrong with what you told them OP.