AIBU to not want to call my daughter’s genitals her vagina?

We go by "private parts"
Good coverall for all the bits and pieces scientifically well move onto one day and universal for both sets of genitals. It is important that girls understand their anatomy but we'll get to that later primary.
Vagina isn't scientific imo because it's usually the outer parts being referred to.
Also wins the argument for "not naming them something silly in case of abuse situations" I've heard before - they're private and referring to them as that if raising anything to other adults is descriptive enough

So much hate for Fannys on this thread. I'll try and not take it personally 🙄😜

Actually yes there is in many child abuse cases. I watch a lot of true crime it has been mentioned on several. I do not know if we have any official stastutics but frankly even 1 is too many.

There was a case in Sweden a year or so ago where a man was initially found not guilty of raping a child because the girl could not accurately name her bits, and it therefore couldn't be determined if the perpetrator had touched her vulva or actually penetrated her vagina. The man has subsequently been found guilty on appeal, but there was a lot of outrage about it.

I think we said 'bits' but they also knew the correct words.

We say vagina (though I know it's a vulva realistically).
We try to use penis, sometimes willy comes out then I have to correct myself.

And yes, if I was to complain of soreness I'd say my vagina is sore today. What else would you say?

We just called them bits-boys bits and girls bits. They know the correct terminology should they need to use it, but bits has worked well for us.

If describing sore bits, it would be inside or outside bits or front or back bits!

So true, the boys are out there having a great time drawing pictures of penises all over their pencil cases and you've got grown women here who can't even say the right word because it's 'ugly'.

We used Twinkle for our girls but that was 20 years or so ago. I’m sure I’d get slated for it now.

I use the correct words and always have for DD15 as it's more about boundaries and safeguarding, although I used to say pits and bits when she was bathing or showering to encourage hygiene.

Vulva.

it’s not just a safeguarding thing and not just about the cps but abusers use words like lollipop for penis and cookie for vulva and then the abuse takes much longer to be uncovered.

it’s also a female sexuality and shame thing. How come males get penis or Willy and no shame or bother but girls don’t even get a universal name. It sets up feelings of shame about the whole area and that our bodies are shameful and not to be talked about.

minge

We used to say 'minnie'

'A child entering "girl front bottom naked" would get very different (not erotic) results to "girl vulva naked" or girl "girl vagina naked" so there is an argument for using emphemisms'

It's on a different topic but i couldn't help but smile at a memory this brought to mind of my then incredibly naive 8 YO son (AS) and his best friend who has joined chess club, trying to find out more detailed moves on line about, yes you guessed it Pawn, or as they thought, porn, moves. The sheer shock and horror as they came running from the computer was quite something.

Gross

Many of my patients get a bit embarrassed/squeamish if I start saying ‘vulva’ or ‘penis’ so I normally say something along the lines of “shall we pop you up on the couch and see what’s going on with your bits” as most people seem to feel more comfortable with that, for whatever reason.

You work with adults??

I've never heard it referred to as vulva by an adult or child in real life!

Who are you telling though?
Friends? Doctor? Someone is just as easily understood if they say vagina and then say internally or externally or inside/outside.
People are so disingenuous about this topic.

I agree we use Willy and MooMoo xx

You'd look like 100x more of a twat if she bellowed out something about her peach or her pie or her clamshell.

No way is that true!

I also think its important for children to have a 'discreet' way to refer to themselves if necessary. A whisper to a parent or trusted teacher about an awkward itch might be more appropriate than making a loud declaration in public about their vulva!

It really isn't an important distinction.
People manage perfectly well by just saying vagina and saying inside or outside. Everyone knows what it means.
It's not that it's hard to get it right, we just want to keep saying vagina.