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Original poster

Baby fell off the couch while husband was "watching" him

106 replies

Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:17

So earlier today I was in the kitchen, DH in the living room with our 6 month old baby on the couch while he was changing his nappy, he is too busy watching the football and the next thing I shouted him just as the baby was falling off the couch, unfortunately he hit the hard floor and started to cry. Luckily he is ok now and iv been keeping my eye on him ever since so signs of anything serious but I'm so angry at him. I have told him again and again you can't take your eyes off him now that he is rolling, like a nagging wife but for very good reason and now it's happened as he never listens to me.
This is my 3rd baby so I would say I'm an experienced parent whereas this is his first baby, so he has taken a bit of guidance from me and I thought he was doing ok until today.
The problem is I'm meant to be going to Barcelona on Wednesday for a couple of days for a hen do and he is in charge of the 3 children and now after today my gut reaction is to not go as he cannot be trusted, what would you do?

OP posts:
PlayDadiFreyr · 22/09/2024 20:49

I was both watching and reacting to my son falling off a chair today. I caught him, but he twisted so that his head bumped the floor nonetheless.

Cheeky little beggar loved it, but point being, it's easy to get wrong!

Funnily enough, my husband was very premature, and he hates how anxious his mum is around babies. She's constantly taking him away from perfectly safe activities. Please try and relax a little, play is so important for babies.

GoldenNuggets08 · 22/09/2024 20:49

I remember when my little one fell off the bed, I was distraught. I would hate to think my OH thought less of me as a parent and that I couldn't br trusted as a result of it. His reaction sounds like he won't let it happen again!

PresidentBarklett · 22/09/2024 20:35

CucumberBagel · 22/09/2024 20:32

Give over. Oooh, football is so exciting and tense that I can't focus on more important things than overpaid grown men running after a ball! Grow up.

Show quote history

You know, it's conceivable that sometimes, just sometimes, people might find things interesting that you don't. And that doesn't make these things worthless. Strange that, as an adult, you don't seem to understand that.

KezzaMucklowe · 22/09/2024 20:34

Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:33

@KezzaMucklowe it was actually the game before the city game, that he claimed he wasn't that bothered about watching so

Nooooo, Grin idiot.

KezzaMucklowe · 22/09/2024 20:34

My dts were prem too - similar sounding gestation.
I get it I really do. However we all make mistakes and it literally sometimes only takes 1 second.
It sounds like he is really upset.
In my experience there's lots of anxiety in the 1st year after having a premature baby. It's such a traumatic experience.
I think you should go away and enjoy your holiday.

Original poster
Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:33

@KezzaMucklowe it was actually the game before the city game, that he claimed he wasn't that bothered about watching so

OP posts:
CucumberBagel · 22/09/2024 20:32

KezzaMucklowe · 22/09/2024 20:26

Was it the City Arsenal game ?
Tbh I could done similar it was a tense game.
I think you should react how you'd want him to if you had been the one who had let the baby fall on your watch.
Let's face it something like this will happen to all parents at some point.

Give over. Oooh, football is so exciting and tense that I can't focus on more important things than overpaid grown men running after a ball! Grow up.

sunshineandshowers40 · 22/09/2024 20:32

Accidents happen. One of mine fell off the bed on my watch- I was very upset, DH didn't blame me or get cross. DC1 was fine and never fell again.

Maria1979 · 22/09/2024 20:31

Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:25

I'm not saying he is a bad dad, he is very hands on and does his fair share but I have warned him time and time again when I have seen him with the baby on the couch to be careful as he can roll now and he responds, I know, well clearly he doesn't because he was too busy watching the football and he fell.
The baby was screaming, I was crying which prompted the others to come running in the room, it was all a very frantic 5 mins before we all settled down, but I'm still angry at him and how am I meant to go away now for a few days as I feel like I will be on pins the whole time

Make him change nappies on the floor with carpet + blanket obviously. Atleast baby is safe..

AgileGreenSeal · 22/09/2024 20:31

He probably can’t be trusted.
Most men can’t.

Original poster
Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:29

@narns I think I am a little anxious, you would think him being my 3rd I would be more chilled out but this little one was premature and he could of died and he was really small when he was born and in my mind fragile, I do worry about him more than the others with his feeding and how he will develop as although he is 6 months, he has an adjusted age of just over 4 months.

OP posts:
PresidentBarklett · 22/09/2024 20:29

Look, its shit. Obviously you didn't want this to happen and nor did he. But I think you're bring unfair.

It's very easy to hear someone saying 'the baby can roll off the couch' buy until you've actually seen it it's impossible to know just how quickly it can happen. You just kinda think 'oh I'll catch him'. Now he knows he won't always catch him.

Go on your trip. It's doubtful that it would happen again. Don't allow your husband making a mistake that most parents have made at some point lead you to lose your trust in him as an adult and a father, as that can only lead to further pain and conflict down the line.

Treetertop · 22/09/2024 20:29

Change him on the floor from now on.

Stinksmum · 22/09/2024 20:29

It happened to me and I was so upset. But unfortunately I had no one to blame because my Husband was at work and I was supposed to be watching her.

Artesia · 22/09/2024 20:29

Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:27

@llamali he was really upset and started to cry that he hurt his son and he only has himself to blame and that I was right he was too busy watching the football. He has spent the rest of the day playing and cuddling him.

That tells you all you need to know. He's a decent person who made a mistake. Imagine if it was the other way round and, as a result of one mistake, your DH wouldn't trust you to take care of the kids on your own.

llamali · 22/09/2024 20:29

Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:27

@llamali he was really upset and started to cry that he hurt his son and he only has himself to blame and that I was right he was too busy watching the football. He has spent the rest of the day playing and cuddling him.

I'd be inclined to believe he won't be doing that again then

SunsetSkylane · 22/09/2024 20:27

Happened to both my kids, mistakes happen sometimes.

Original poster
Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:27

@llamali he was really upset and started to cry that he hurt his son and he only has himself to blame and that I was right he was too busy watching the football. He has spent the rest of the day playing and cuddling him.

OP posts:
llamali · 22/09/2024 20:27

How has your anxiety been generally since the birth? Is it possible it's a combination of him not being attentive enough and your anxiety catastrophising?

KezzaMucklowe · 22/09/2024 20:26

Was it the City Arsenal game ?
Tbh I could done similar it was a tense game.
I think you should react how you'd want him to if you had been the one who had let the baby fall on your watch.
Let's face it something like this will happen to all parents at some point.

BirthdayRainbow · 22/09/2024 20:25

It was a totally avoidable pain to your baby so no wonder you're pissed off. It's no accident when anyone with half a brain knows what could happen.

Go on the trip but I'd be telling him again to focus on the baby, not the football and to make sure he doesn't let him get hurt again.

Original poster
Lorddenning1 · 22/09/2024 20:25

I'm not saying he is a bad dad, he is very hands on and does his fair share but I have warned him time and time again when I have seen him with the baby on the couch to be careful as he can roll now and he responds, I know, well clearly he doesn't because he was too busy watching the football and he fell.
The baby was screaming, I was crying which prompted the others to come running in the room, it was all a very frantic 5 mins before we all settled down, but I'm still angry at him and how am I meant to go away now for a few days as I feel like I will be on pins the whole time

OP posts:
SurpriseTwinPregnancy · 22/09/2024 20:24

I feel this is a rite of passage when you are a new parent, OP. Has something similar not happened to you before?

Singleandproud · 22/09/2024 20:24

Being left alone for a few days is exactly what he needs. At the minute he has you for back up to step in, chances are when baby's safety is down to him alone he'll step up.

ExquisiteEmelda · 22/09/2024 20:23

Could be a blessing in disguise, my guess is he’ll watch the kids more carefully when you’re away now.

(My DD rolled off the bed around the same age, whoops).