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Original poster

How much money do you give for a wedding gift?

116 replies

geordiegreek · 22/09/2024 17:54

Hi I'm going to a wedding next month, it's a friend of mine, not best friend but a good friend I would say. She's been living with her husband to be for a number of years, already has kids, so I was just going to put some money in the card but I really have no idea how much to put 🙈 Aibu to ask what's the 'done thing'?

It's quite a fancy wedding at a posh kind of hall & im going with my 3 children if that makes any difference.

I do work although don't have loads of money to spare! But don't want to be seen as a cheapskate or anything. Just wondered what others do.

Any advice appreciated. Thank you :)

OP posts:
Birdingbear · 22/09/2024 18:44

£40-£50

ShillyShallySherbet · 22/09/2024 18:44

£50 is more than enough.

Turbo4 · 22/09/2024 18:43

I always give £50 unless a very close family member like a sibling where I would give more.

Can never get my head around ‘cover your plate’.

AzureSheep · 22/09/2024 18:41

I’m GOBSMACKED at people saying £100!

Id say £20-50 depending on your circumstances, especially if you’re forking out for hotel, transport, outfits for you and 3 kids.

If they have a gift list, I’d be more inclined to get something from that if it’s not crazy expensive.

bananaboats · 22/09/2024 18:38

£50-£100

Incakewetrust · 22/09/2024 18:38

If I'm not especially close to them, £50.
If they're a close friend or family member, £100.

mushypaperstraws · 22/09/2024 18:37

I try give enough to cover our meals, so they're not too out of pocket for inviting me

CarmelaBrunella · 22/09/2024 18:36

SpanThatWorld · 22/09/2024 18:35

Exactly.

When we got married, we invited the people we loved most to be with us.

We paid for a nice lunch.
They gave up their Saturday.

Show quote history

I agree 💯

SpanThatWorld · 22/09/2024 18:35

CarmelaBrunella · 22/09/2024 18:25

You're a guest. You don't have to "cover" anything.

Show quote history

Exactly.

When we got married, we invited the people we loved most to be with us.

We paid for a nice lunch.
They gave up their Saturday.

CarmelaBrunella · 22/09/2024 18:35

Rain11 · 22/09/2024 18:05

If you went out with your
3 kids and your partner to have dinner at a fancy place, you would end up paying far more than 100 quid. In my opinion it isn't enough, I would say at least 250.

You're not going out for dinner. You're guests at a wedding. They're hosting, they provide.
What you bring is a gift..

IKillHousePlants · 22/09/2024 18:33

£50 per adult so £100 a couple, but only if that is comfortably affordable, otherwise less.
You don't have to pay to cover the cost of inviting you, you are a guest, it's not supposed to be tit for tat.
If you can't afford it then give nothing but a nice message in a card. Assume you were invited because they want you, not a cash gift.

Holliiday · 22/09/2024 18:32

I think its regional. Never in my life heard of anyone putting £250 in a card for a friend's wedding, only close close family. But I think its common on MN.

SpanThatWorld · 22/09/2024 18:32

Rain11 · 22/09/2024 18:05

If you went out with your
3 kids and your partner to have dinner at a fancy place, you would end up paying far more than 100 quid. In my opinion it isn't enough, I would say at least 250.

If it were a fancy place of my own choosing to celebrate my own event, that would be relevant.

I cannot imagine giving a friend more than £50 and would be mortified if any friend spent more than that on my event.

CarmelaBrunella · 22/09/2024 18:25

Snowdrops17 · 22/09/2024 18:21

My rule of thumb is cover your plates so about 150

You're a guest. You don't have to "cover" anything.

Tereseta · 22/09/2024 18:24

We are going to my friends wedding next May and were thinking about this recently. My dd will be bridesmaid and we are paying for hotel and transport 4 hours away, I'm thinking 50 in our situation.

TheCentreCannotHold · 22/09/2024 18:23

There was a thread about this last week which had some lively discussion on it.

Snowdrops17 · 22/09/2024 18:21

My rule of thumb is cover your plates so about 150

Prinnny · 22/09/2024 18:20

£100 if just you £150+ for the whole family.

Cobblersorchard · 22/09/2024 18:19

We do £100 as a couple for friends, £150 for family.

When I was single I did £75/£100

Xmasbaby11 · 22/09/2024 18:19

£50-100 for the family.

toomuchfaff · 22/09/2024 18:18

£50-£100 depending on your own circumstances, also are you getting a hotel or anything? If not then probably £100

CobraChicken · 22/09/2024 18:17

£150-£200. (I'd have said £100 if you were going alone.)

Grrrrrrrrr8 · 22/09/2024 18:13

£50. And that was what most people gave at my wedding.

UpTheMagicFarawayTree · 22/09/2024 18:09

£50-75 depending on who they are to me.

CarmelaBrunella · 22/09/2024 18:08

£50.