Why do so many women blame peri menopausal for their moods?

Seems to me, the more aware women are becoming of the affects of perimenopause and understanding why they are feeling and behaving differently, the more people are coming out to bash them for it.

Just another version of "women, know your place" 🙄

I totally agree

Who says we do blame our hormones all the time or blame every little transgression on feeling menopausal. I don't think I know anyone who does that all the time, and I work with a lot of perimenopausal and menopausal women.

You are implying exactly the same as misogynistic men do with your internalised misogynistic attitudes towards women.
Hormones, whether that is PMT or due to pregnancy or menopause do affect significantly impact some women.
You are implying that this somehow makes us less competent than men.
just because this hasn’t been your experience it doesn’t make it untrue.

Because women aren't allowed to be pissed off, frustrated, upset or, Heaven Forbid, angry

So, why don't we just own it instead of blaming our hormones all the time?
I get that the menopause affects everyone differently, but I feel that blaming every little transgression on feeling menopausal is doing women no favours. I feel we are shooting ourselves in the foot by doing this.

It's the same with people using the poor mental health card as a free ticket to behave badly.

It doesn't help those with genuine problems attributed to the menopause or mental health issues because everything is minimised.

but you obviously don't get it if you're saying you understand why women attribute their mood to that but then at the same time saying they shouldn't. Presumably they aren't just using it as an excuse, they believe their biological changes ARE the reason for their mood, so if that's what they think why are they not allowed to say it? If anything it's showing self-awareness.

even in the example you quoted, people wearing hats aren't really 'being a twat.' That's the whole point, it's something that wouldn't have even registered as being annoying with lots of people, possibly including the OP herself a few years ago, so it makes sense for lots of her to then think 'hmm why is something fairly innocuous annoying me so much?' and if there's no other obvious cause, it could very well be the case that the huge hormonal difference happening in my body IS the reason for my changed behaviour.

It's the same as any other reason for feeling stronger emotions than usual - crying easily because you're pregnant, snapping at people because you're having a tough time at work, struggling because of dementia. Presumably if those people weren't, for example, pregnant or didn't think pregnancy was affecting their emotions they wouldn't blame it on pregnancy! Those who don't feel being p-m affects their moods won't suggest it is, but those that do are allowed to!

Complete bollocks.

I think it does affect some people's mood but that plenty of others pretend to others or even themselves that it does, when really it doesn't. I could have predicted plenty in advance, based on personality when younger.

Peri menopause almost sent me over the edge. I felt suicidal at times. I had to phone the Samaritans it got that bad.

Well it’s just that sometimes I’m in the same room as someone I love very much, who is a nice and good person, but because we’re in the same room and I can hear them breathing, I have to leave before I want to start shouting or throwing things.

I never used to feel like that. Just feels like a bit of a coincidence that it started happening when I was 45, at the same time my joints started hurting, my eye sight fell off a cliff and my periods went haywire. Yeah….it’s perimenopause.

You’ll be happy to know though that I don’t behave badly (in public or private), and I avoid confrontation at all costs.

But yes, I experience flashes of irrational rage that are definitely caused by my changing hormones.

A classic ‘it didn’t impact me so everyone must be making it up’ thread!

Because I have turned into a right grumpy mare since peri menopause has started.
I feel like I have less patience for people who do things that I feel is stupid or just annoying
where as before I would let it go now it just annoys me.
A few of my friends are the same so we tend to blame most things now on Peri menopause

People are getting what you are saying. It’s just that what you are saying doesn’t make any sense!

Have some compassion for fucks sake! During peri I felt like aliens had taken over my body. Settled down after a year or so, but it was a horrible time. I know the difference between an off day and that period in my life.

My generation used to blame PMT, the following generations blame things like peri-menopause.

Thats life. 😉

Perhaps it's because we get to a certain point in our life managing just fine and then BAM! Might as well be having a second puberty.

I think I agree with the OP’s point that women are allowed to just be pissed off. They shouldn’t feel they have to have a hormonal justification.

But on the other hand it’s well known that perimenopause can have an effect on mood/tolerance/patience levels.

Empathy is not your strongest suit, OP.

Im on Day 14 of bleeding after taking HRT. The bleeding started after being on it for 13 weeks. I stopped taking HRT nine days after the bleeding started. Im much more irritated now than i was before taking it due to having heavy bleeding (not spotting as they like to claim) period pain, piles peeing every ten mins period shits All the things i had to go with my periods came back. I never had a sore fanjo before HRT but i do now thanks to all the bleeding. Ive been on the mini pill for three years. No periods for two years + My last heavy one must have been around 2018/19 Its affected my sex life (which wasnt a problem before) Took this to prevent possible future problems and in doing so ive created a problem in the present. Im 51 and possibly still in peri and mini pill possibly stopped my periods but i wish id never touched HRT and took the leftover pills to Boots yesterday to be destroyed.

Seriously? Just because something is a natural process, it doesn't mean it's good for you.

During perimenopause, hormones are in flux, constantly. For some, this will greatly affect their mental health and mood. Anxiety and depression is a common side effect of perimenopause to the degree that many GPs simply dole out anti-depressants rather than HRT.

Surely it's not hard to grasp that some women are more affected by their hormones than others. Just because you were fine! I suffered terribly through puberty and I'm suffering through peri menopause at an early age at the moment. I never use it as an excuse to be an arse to people of course, I don't even tell people. But I do get horrendous anxiety, rage and mood swings.

I don't agree with this. I'm quite a sociable person. But ,during bouts of depression would probably come across as 'rude' ,simply because I could barely function let alone have a conversation with anyone! My niece has autism and has been accused of being 'rude' because she simply cannot make eye contact, amongst other things.

I’m usually a very chilled person. Never one to rant & very placid.

Except when I used to have PMT (not every
month - the hormones would be horrific around every 3 months. Paranoia increases, sense and reason goes out the window. I have a bit of high maintenance husband we would only argue during these periods as I couldn’t take his crap and or reasoning. This PMT has been replaced with something else.

Now I’m 46 it’s hard - the emotions during this time horrible, I just want to be me not this monster who is short tempered and struggles with confidence and full of anxiety. And weight gain - I look in the mirror and don’t always recognise the person in front of me once always a size 8 now hitting 14 (and occasionally 16) while I stare at the salad in front of me.

Be glad you’re lucky it hasn’t affected you in this way but don’t make out it can’t be happening or it’s an excuse.

I'm 52 and undoubtedly in peri. I don't get have rages or emotional outbursts, but I did start getting fairly major anxiety. I started taking some supplements, which really helped. I think it's fine for me to attribute my increased anxiety to perimenopausal hormone changes, as that is the logical, most likely cause. I'd have been a bit taken aback if someone had said to me 'Why are you blaming your anxiety on perimenopause? It's a natural process, you know!'

Well in my case I can quite clearly see a change that can be attributed to peri hormones. At 42 my periods went haywire, I started getting really bad PMT (had never had it before) and became anxious and panicky.