Would you become pregnant at 47 if....

If I felt like this then I absolutely would.

The question of "am I too old?" has come up on MN for many many years. You will get some people who wouldn't dream of having a baby over the age of 29 and others who have happily given birth in their late forties.
It's a huge decision and the only person who can weigh it up is yourself. Asking strangers on the internet is just going to leave you in a further state of indecision.

All the best in whatever you decide x

Thing is, you don't get your state pension until 67 so the reality is that, health permitting, we will all have to work until that age anyway!

It doesn't end either when they're 18. Uni is another rollercoaster of emotions, setbacks, successes, relationships good and bad, and expense. Even after uni. many young people are back living at home. I've had one living with us 2.5 years while saving to buy a house. Another one went away for 4 years, came back for 2 years, and has gone again. Youngest is living at home part-way through uni. I honestly didn't think the level of practical commitment and support would go on for so long!

@Noangelbuthavingfun I really feel for you. I had fertility issues for years, followed by 2 DC in my mid 30s, miscarriages, then DC3 when I was 40. It's not what I had planned but hey, life got in the way.

I don't honestly think I'd have had a baby at 48. I'm in my early 60s and couldn't contemplate having a teenager. Maybe people adapt; I suppose they do if the situation is a reality.

IVF has such a small chance of success too, and if you did conceive, what is the likelihood of miscarriage? Disappointed and devastation all over again, and still no baby. I'm not sure it's a good idea to put yourself through that. I really feel for you though - I know what that sense of longing is like.

By 48, I was post-menopausal anyway, done and dusted!

47 seems old to have a baby. Certainly wouldn’t want a pregnancy with a donated egg. Perhaps consider fostering or adoption.

Personally, no. I don't think celebrities are a good example of anything to do with parenting - what you see is never the reality of it. I would spend some money on counselling instead. It sounds as if you need some help to mourn the life you didn't have so you can appreciate your current circumstances.

I had older parents - my dad was 50 when I was born - and he was wonderful but it definitely made my life harder and I missed out on loads when I was a child. My DC have had a totally different experience of childhood and it made me realise all that I missed.

This is my view as well. It’s different if it‘s a happy accident but I would never choose to do it intentionally

Hi OP, as much as I feel for your desperation to have a second child, I really think that 47 is too old . I have friends who had donor eggs/IVF at 48; their children are beautiful but like all young children, require lots of attention and care. They will be in their 60s when the kids are teenagers; I'm not sure that's fair on anyone, despite how active and 'youthful' people are. That always seems to be the counter 'argument'.
You seem to desperately want another to fulfil a need in yourself which isn't healthy.
Please focus on what you have, I agree that counselling might help. Take care

Good God no. Hopefully my trusty Mirena will stop any scares

There's literally loads of 70 year olds out there who don't need care!

I do know of someone in her mid 40s who used a donor egg with partner sperm, for her first and only baby. It’s worked very well for her. Child now maybe 4.

Baby at 45 (donor egg/sperm). Would have loved another if I'd had the money for more treatment.
If that's what you want and are prepared for it not to work then go for it.
Good luck!

I think most people yearn for another child. I know we made a decision to stop at 2 but boy do I yearn for another. But economically, my age and fairness to my other children it wouldn’t be the right thing to do.
I actually personally think donor eggs and IVf is very selfish if your own body has told you that you are too old. Natural pregnancy would tell you your body is still fertile.

lots of things for you to consider if you could get pregnant naturally.
-how fit are you?
-could you handle a difficult baby and intense sleepless nights?
-how financially stable? Can you afford a lot more help than first time around?
-how the other child will feel (now and in the future ie would you be able to be a hands on grandparent potentially (if you wanted to be) if you were still raising younger child.
-what provision could you make if something happened to you.

ultimately only you can decide if it will work for you. If you genuinely feel you can do it then I don’t think people telling you no is likely to sway you.

I had a baby at 47 (we both were) ….. my youngest at that point was 13.

Baby is now a healthy, bright and intelligent 6 year old. It’s not a breeze but it’s not particularly hard either.

Good luck to you whatever you decide x

No. All the famous people having these babies at 47 make it look so easy but the average woman I really don't think this is a good idea. They have so much more support /money etc.

The point is it’s more likely to happen the older you get. It’s awful when someone young or younger than average dies, especially when they have children. But it’s also untypical. If you heard someone died at 65/70 you’d think that was very sad and still quite young, but not shocking depending on the illness. But leaving a 15/20 year old behind when most people’s children would be well into adulthood by that age is a different perspective, and should be absolutely considered even if ultimately you’d chose to take the risk. My father was in his 40s when I was born and still going (wasting oxygen) to this day, so obviously it’s not an absolute. But definitely a serious consideration.

No. If this is something you wanted then you should have done it sooner. Why didn't you? I think you should be grateful for the child you have and accept that the child bearing part of your life is over and move on.

Absolutely not. There's a reason that our eggs have a sell by date.

What does your partner say? Do they agree to their sperm fertilising some unknown's eggs? How would you feel with a child who isn't yours but is your partner's.

I disagree one of my very young parents died (not going into detail as it is outing)- younger than yours, you can drop dead any moment...life is not guaranteed - get on with it and live it.

No

No - what a nightmare. Can't imagine looking after a baby at 47 (I'm 50), let alone being pregnant. But you do you - put your body through the hell that will be IVF etc to make this happen if that's what you need. Maybe explore empty nest syndrome with a therapist quickly and first

If we all worried about not being around for children, many people would never have children as life does not come with guarantees as you point out. She should not let that impact her decision.

Of course it should impact your decision somewhat, being much older than typical to have a baby that needs raising until they’re at least 18. I had my last child at 34, something I did and do worry about knowing my own mum died at 58 from an illness. One that incapacitated her for 8 years before she actually passed away. It’s very easy to say ‘oh well it can happy anyone, don’t let that worry you too much’. As parents we should worry what’s realistically on the clock for us, because leaving young children (my youngest sibling was a teenager) is a shit show.

Not sure. Would have to be in that position.

No

Yes my post here was aimed at the op - trying to encourage her, to not give a rats arse about what people on here think. But yes she did ask for opinions..

As you say you can lose a parent at age.. as my previous post on here said I had VERY young parents and one of them didn't make it to 60, so my children have grown up without knowing one of their grandparents - so age of your parents is not a guarantee they will see your major life events.

If we all worried about not being around for children, many people would never have children as life does not come with guarantees as you point out. She should not let that impact her decision.

good luck xxx