My DS accidentally hurt his friend

As far as the other kid and their parent go - leave well alone.

Your kid - small chat about how bad he felt connect that to ''and this is why play fighting is a poor choice of game to play."

Then move on.

Don't approach the mum, especially as she doesn't seem to be particularly friendly. To be honest, for all school issues with other kids, leave it to the school.

These things happen at school a lot, it could have been your son that was hurt when they were play fighting. Speak to your son about being careful and then forget about it.

I'm going through this at the moment, if it's a parent I already know, I have said I'm sorry this happened and we've had a chat with dc about this. If its a parent I don't know, I leave it, but am prepared to say the same if they approach me. Our teacher said there's no need for me to do this, it's dealt with in school.
I wouldn't do the letter or picture thing as your re hashing this with your son, who would of moved on from the incident. Maybe on route to school talk about what type of day he's going to have and what that looks like, e.g a good day with kind hands and listening ears.
I get the anxiety though!

The note / picture is a nice idea but I’d only do this if your son feels bad wants to make more amends. Little kids do things like this ALL the time, you need not anguish yourself. Also I wouldn’t assume mums lack of play date follow up is anything to do with you, she might just be busy/forgeful/not super focused on kids play dates. I wouldn’t bring it up again, but I’d just assume neutrality rather than infer some like/dislike. Most people are busy with own lives to think much of other parents they don’t really know.

Just leave it, school have sorted it and it was an accident.

Going to get teacher assistance for his hurt friend and one verbal apology is entirely sufficient for a small red mark caused during mutual play fighting. Praise your son for being honest and telling the teacher, and calmly discourage more playfighting because it's too easy to accidentally hurt someone. Then leave it.

It's understandable to be anxious about other parents judging or such but all of this talk of approaching the mom yourself or having your DS make a card or picture or gift or apologize again is just centering the adults feelings instead of the children's best interests. Blowing this out of proportion isn't fair to your DS - it's one way children develop excess anxiety about making mistakes or upsetting people, and it will only discourage him from owning up to things in the future.

Seriously, leave it. The school have dealt with it.

You are making more out of this than it is. You are taking a very minor incident where both kids were play fighting and turning in to some big thing.

If you make your child write notes and draw pictures, it is going to give the other mum ammunition to dislike you more because it will make her think this is some sort of big assault on her child by yours.

She doesn't like you, deal with it. Don't go creeping to her trying to make her like you. It won't work and very well could make it worse. She could veto her child from being friends with yours at all.

Oh wow i wouldn't think anything of it. At that age a little boy who was my daughters best friend for years almost fractured her wrist by accident. She knew he didn't mean it.
Another boy actually fractured her wrist years later and again, DD knew he didn't mean to do it. One boy was Aspergers like my daughter and the other one she said she though he has ADHD and tried his best to appologise.LOL she was cranky at that one for a moment as it was painful on contrete push.. but got over it and they all get on. I hold nothing against the kids or parents.

It would be bad to get him to do a picture or whatever, because grovelling tends to make people like you less, rather than more.

It's perfectly normal for children to have accidents, they're 5, they're learning.

Focus on other mums who you have a good rapport with and perhaps arrange other play dates. You can't be everyone's cup of tea, try not to worry about this particular mum. Sounds like a her problem, don't waste another moment worrying about her.

Don’t do that. Overkill.

listen to everyone else. It was handled at school. Have a follow up chat with him about play fighting, and then let it go. Anything else is making him act on your insecurities. That is wrong. He and his mate probably didn’t skip a beat with the incident and it’s long forgotten. You making a thing out of it will make things worse for both boys.

Don’t do anything, certainly don’t approach the parent, either directly or through making your child write a note.

If the parent approaches you, tell them the school has dealt with the incident and direct them to speak to school. If they approach your child, tell the school.

It's play fighting, it's what boys do...my cousin threw me through a glass cocktail cabinet. Which I reminded him of in my best man's speech!

Don't worry about it, the boys would have forgotten about it by tomorrow and be fighting again

This is just the first of lots of playground accidents and friend issues. Seriously, stop dwelliing on it and don't make your child dwell on it. It was an accident and one that the school managed. He's already apologised. The picture and yet another apology are not needed and might be used against you or him.

I'm a retired teacher. This is just very minor playground incident, and you need to learn to chill. .

I wouldn't get your son to write a note unless he's the one that's suggested it. It feels like he's being encouraged to dwell on something that was an innocent accident. He's done the right thing by letting the teacher know and apologising at the time, it sounds like he's a considerate little boy.

I would do nothing - sounds like they were both play fighting. So it could have been your Ds that got hurt

I think you are massively overthinking - school deal with in school issues .

I suspect how you feel this mum feels about buy and your Ds is the influencing your response.

let the boys been school friends

Really, don't do this. I'm sure the teacher would have asked your son to apologise already. You are making far too much of this. You seem overly concerned about this mother disapproving of you.

It might thaw out the mum I mean

If it makes OP feel better and it's a little kind gesture why are you pleading with her not too? I might thaw out the mum a little

Please just leave it. The school have dealt with it. Your DC has took ownership.

Nothing else to do/say.

That's what I'd do.. it costs nothing
Maybe the mum might lighten up a bit and get you talking?

Picture, little card, a small note it's fine! Whatever you think is best or can get your lad to do. Don't stress too much x

I assume your son has already apologised and said sorry. I think a note and picture are overkill, and if the mother doesn’t like you already you are handing her something to possibly use against you. “ I can see @PGBland s hand all over this pathetic note and picture. I suppose she thinks that makes it ok that her child has hurt another child , just as long as they sorry…….”

it has been dealt with by the school. If she does approach you remind her of that and tell her that your child did apologise for something that was accidental.